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modern family video essay

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A Decade Later: What Did Modern Family Teach Us?

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Table of Contents Show

Phil & claire, jay & gloria, mitchell & cameron, watch your wording, jay vs mitchell, love/hate sisterhood, entrusting modern family values  , entrusting legacy, farewell to modern family.

The mockumentary sitcom Modern Family has finally concluded its ten-year run on ABC with eleven seasons and 250 episodes. With the end of Modern Family, it marks the end of an era for millions of families. The show became popular for its portrayal of realistic and relatable family dynamics. It is through this that viewers were able to connect with the characters and taught us several lessons while having us laugh along the way. In light of this, let’s take a look at what the show has taught us throughout its run.  

How To Be A Parent In Your Modern Family

Being a parent is one of the most challenging things that people can go through. There is no solid methodology to follow other than trying your best and learning from any mistakes. Many books, television shows, and public speakers have all given their take on how to become the perfect parent. Modern Family explores this dynamic by exploring different parenting styles in an ever-changing society.

“Every new generation thinks they have cracked the code on child rearing.”- Claire Dunphy Claire Dunphy

In the show’s exploration of being a parent in the modern era, all three families adopted a good cop/bad cop parenting style. Mitch, Claire, and Jay representing the controlling and attentive parents (bad cops). Cam, Phil, and Gloria represent lenient and permissive parents (good cops). Despite all three families sharing a similar parenting style, they accustom it to their situation and their children’s needs.   

The Dunphy’s serve as an example of a traditional nuclear family. They also follow the dysfunctional family trope usually seen on sitcoms, with Phil serving as the ‘fun parent’ and Claire as the ‘helicopter mom’. They tried switching roles in the episode “Good Cop, Bad Dog,” but realized they cannot handle each other’s roles. This is because Phil wishes to recreate his fun childhood with his kids and Claire wants to ensure her kids won’t make the same mistakes as she did. This tells any prospective parents that they do not need to change who they are. As long as you and your partner agree to have the best interests for your children. 

Phil and Claire Dunphy from Modern Family.

While Phil and Claire’s parenting dynamic represents a traditional style of parenting. It is one that teaches their kids how to act socially while being able to follow through with their responsibilities. Even though they have to face the challenges of parenting in the era of social media. They eventually incorporate the ever-developing modern tech into their daily lives and match it to their parenting style. In addition to following their dysfunctional habits, the show challenges and reinvents their tropes. For example, despite Phil’s goofy and lenient parenting style, he will assert discipline when it is absolutely necessary.

This sets him apart from the Homer Simpson trope because he will say what is necessary when his kids are spiraling down the wrong path. When Haley has to attend a disciplinary committee in order to stay in college, Phil scolds her about her nonchalant attitude towards the severity of the situation. She immediately got her act together and took responsibility for her actions. This tells the viewers that it is necessary to act outside your comfort zone for the sake of your children’s future.

The Pritchett/ Delgado family serves as an example of a non-traditional step-family. Gloria and Manny represented a single-parent family until Jay married Gloria and shared responsibility as one of Manny’s legal guardian. As the number of divorces increases every year, this family dynamic explores the challenges and benefits behind a step-family. One of the reasons, Jay and Gloria’s marriage works is because they both fulfilled something the other wants. It was eventually revealed that Gloria divorced her husband due to his irresponsibility. Meanwhile, Jay divorced his wife because of genuine differences. It is through Jay’s maturity and Gloria’s genuine feeling/s that they are the reasons why their marriage works.

Jay and Gloria from Modern Family.

Gloria’s parenting style is giving constant positive reinforcement to Manny, telling him that he is perfect in everything he does. This kind of parenting style leads me to believe that Manny will be filled with self-confidence. However, this backfires and Manny is identified as a ‘Momma’s Boy.’ Jay, on the other hand always pushes Manny to act his age and to be more assertive like a man. This parenting style is more in line with what Jay learned from his father, who treated him similarly during his childhood.

Jay and Gloria’s parenting represents two sides of very extreme ideologies between smothering and calloused parenting. They continually debate that their method is the best way to raise Manny. What they soon realize is that the best method of raising Manny is the combination of both styles. That way, he will be able to venture any challenges he wants like a man. If he fails, he knows that his parents will always be there for him, encouraging him to try again. Informing the viewers that there is no one true method of raising a kid, but combining different parenting styles.

The Pritchett-Tucker family serves as another form of a non-traditional family dynamic, a homosexual family household. They represent a family that goes against the traditional nuclear family trope. In the show, however, they reinvent the status quo of what it means to be a modern family.

The challenges of parenting are just the same no matter where you are on the spectrum. While there are numerous arguments facing the LGBT community about same-sex parenting, the series represents them as normal and loving as any heterosexual parent. Acknowledging how their lifestyle is different compared to traditional heterosexual households, they educate any cultural and societal differences to their adopted daughter, Lily so that she doesn’t feel left out or displaced in any way.

Mitchell and Cameron from Modern Family.

When it comes to their parenting styles, Mitchell takes after his father’s parenting by serving as the traditional role of the calloused parent trying to teach self-sufficiency. In comparison, Cam takes a permissive style where he coddles Lily and is very responsive to her needs and wishes. This resulted in Cam staying at home more often and taking on the role of a stay-at-home dad. However, later seasons changed this dynamic when Mitchell quit his job and the two became dual-income households.

They eventually share responsibilities in raising their daughter. The two frequently try out multiple different trending parenting techniques to raise Lily. This comes in the shapes of child leashes, positive reinforcement of the word ‘adoption’, and creating personalized children’s books. This shows the viewers that there is no methodical way to raise a child, but by spending the time and effort to research new methods defines what good parents people you can potentially be.

Anyone Can Be Your Modern Family

Modern Family showcases its diverse cast and unifies them as a loving family. It tells the viewers that anybody can be your family no matter what kind of background you come from. As long as you keep an open mind and be loving and accepting.

“Family is family. Whether it’s the one you start out with… the one you end up with… or the family you gain along the way.” – Gloria Pritchett Gloria Pritchett

Jay and Gloria’s relationship can be easily judged as an old man and a gold digger scenario. While the show addresses this issue, it discredits this stereotypical image by showing the genuine relationship between Jay and Gloria. Claire was especially guilty of this, because she thought that Gloria was a gold digger for the first season.

Claire judging Gloria

When Claire and Gloria confront this issue, she comes to terms with it after finding out how Gloria makes her father happy. Despite their age difference, Jay and Gloria are passionately crazy about each other and prove everyone wrong. This tells the viewer that genuine feelings for one another is what creates a family, no matter how old you are.

At the beginning of the series, Jay adjusts to raising Manny as his step-son. At the same time, Manny tries to determine whether Jay is different from the other guys that her mother used to date. In addition, Jay’s attempt to get along with Manny presents the struggles of bonding between a step-father and a step-son.

Manny, Jay, and Gloria all trying something new.

Despite their differences in each other’s hobbies and interests, Manny realizes how much Jay cares for him when Jay calls him ‘his kid.’ After hearing this, Manny accepts Jay as a father figure and someone who is good enough for his mother. He always depends on Jay for fatherly advice on whatever social problems he faces. This father/son relationship tells the viewer that anybody can be your family, as long as there is mutual love and respect for each other.

Being adopted from Vietnam by two gay men, Lily always knew she was different from her parents and other families. Her curiosity about her non-traditional household comes up a lot in the early seasons. Mitch and Cam try their best to answer any questions that she has and several moments throughout the show highlight her feeling of being too different from her family.

Mitch, Cam, and Lilly from Modern Family.

One of the topics that was discussed was when she called herself gay in the early seasons. However, this was soon revealed to be a simple misunderstanding, because she mistook being gay as an ethnicity. Realizing that she doesn’t have a traditional ethnic connection to her fathers, she announced that she is gay so she would have more things in common with her fathers. In later seasons, however, Lily becomes more understanding of her upbringing and embraces that she is different from her fathers. At the end of the day, she knows that family is not restricted by blood, but family is the people who love and support you.

The show follows a narrative formula for when each character gets into comedic scenarios, mainly due to their misunderstanding and their wording. They show the viewers the importance of watching their wording because it can easily be taken out of context and bring some awkward social situations. Some like:

  • “If you ain’t white, you ain’t right!”- Phil Dunphy
  • “I think we would all be better off if people would go back where they came from”- Cameron Tucker
  • “What could be more natural than your mother’s tongue in your ear?”- Gloria Pritchett
  • “I love film-making and I love love. I guess you could say I enjoy making love on film and I love doing it by myself.”- Phil Dunphy
  • “Luke, grab that little hoe.”- Claire Dunphy
  • “On my lower back, I will put the words “Go Deep.”- Phil Dunphy

A Modern Family Always Comes First

In the series premiere, the viewers are introduced to all three families and see what kind of people they are. Everyone in the main cast is uniquely different from each other and they all have differing opinions. Despite their differences, the audience quickly learns that everyone in the main cast will put family above all else.

One of the longest narratives that the show was portraying was Jay and Mitchell’s straining relationship. Jay has always expressed his discomfort at having a gay son and everything that comes along with it. When gay marriage was legalized, Jay expresses that he has done his best to be supportive of him, but in the season five episode, “Message Received,” Jay admits that he doesn’t understand gay marriage and argues that Mitchell doesn’t try enough to make Jay comfortable with his marriage by saying:

“Why do you get to be you, but I don’t get to be me. I didn’t choose to be uncomfortable. I was born this way”. Jay Pritchett

After hearing this, Mitchell uninvited his father to his wedding and wanted him out of his life for being unable to accept him for who he is. However, after a series of unfortunate events on the day of their wedding, Jay sees that they are struggling to keep everything together.

Jay and Mitchell trying to spend some alone time.

Despite his personal views of gay marriage and Mitchell’s homosexuality, Jay can’t stand seeing his son miserable on what is supposed to be the happiest day of his life. He sets aside his views and accepts Mitchell and Cameron for who they are and gives them the best wedding ever by booking it at his favorite country club. Proud of Mitchell for finding his partner for life, he walks him down the aisle to showcase his acceptance. 

Haley and Alex’s relationship portrays a very relatable experience of a sibling rivalry. The two bickered, fought, and always got back at each other every chance they could. This was due to their personalities and values being opposite to each other. As Haley prioritized social relationships, Alex, on the other hand, focused more on academics. It was only until later seasons that they became more supportive of each other.

Haley and Alex bonding after nearly getting into a car accident.

They value each other’s advice and moral support for personal issues that other members of the family can’t understand. While Haley is aware of her ditzy, air-headed nature, it makes her feel like a family failure. Meanwhile, Alex understands her inability to make friends and struggles with loneliness. This is where the two sisters set aside their petty arguments and help each other where the other fails. Haley advises Alex with her social life to have friends and boyfriends. Alex encourages Haley to realize her true potential and breaks out of her self-conscious image. Despite all of their petty arguments, the two can always depend on each other when they need it the most.    

Entrust The New Generation 

Throughout the show’s goofy and situational comedy, it sprinkles in sweet wholesome moments that make us want to tell our family how much we care about them. The most consistent episodes of the series that draw out these emotions are the ones where the themes of death and legacy are brought up. These episodes portray a touching narrative of entrusting future generations to hold up their legacy and values. It taught us what kind of qualities we want to pass down and entrust to the future generations of our family.    

Alex has always been the ‘smart one’ in the entire family and has always striven to be the best at everything she sets her mind out to. However, when Alex gets accepted into Cal Tech, she worries that she is going to be the dumbest one there and fail miserably. Jay truthfully tells her that it’s going to be extremely challenging, but encourages her to keep going.

Jay entrusting Alex to watch over the family.

In addition to his advice, Jay also shows her the family endlessly bickering and fighting amongst each other. He tells her that the family needs a leader and entrusts her to keep the family in check and together once he is gone. Acknowledging that Alex is capable enough to handle whatever challenges come her way, whether it is school or family. Jay passing down the title of the family patriarch to Alex when he passes symbolizes that he sees a lot of potential in Alex.

“The family needs a leader and I can’t do it forever. You can handle it.” – Jay Pritchett Jay Pritchett

Alex striving in her academics provides her family with an objective source of knowledge to their problems. Through her competency, she is able to protect the family from their own misunderstandings. Jay sees this and trusts her to keep the family from dwindling apart from petty arguments. It is a role that protects the loving family relationship that they all have with each other and it is something Jay wants to be maintained as long as possible, because not every family has the same loving dynamic as they do.  

Phil and his father Frank have always shown their ideal father/son relationship in the show. It portrays a fun and goofy relationship that viewers can immediately tell where Phil has gotten his lovable optimism from. Phil always calls Frank the best father he could ever have, and he tries to be the best fun-dad for his kids like Frank has been for him. However, there were several moments throughout the show where Phil felt like he had let his father down.

Phil cutting Frank's hair.

One of these moments is when Phil felt guilty about not inheriting the family supermarket. Frank assures Phil he has inherited the family business of being a fun, cool dad. Inheriting the optimistic, goofy qualities that Phil always loved during his childhood was the best thing he ever could have proudly inherited from his father. This meant that he was officially like his father in the fun dad department and it also meant he could pass down the same lovable qualities and memories to his children. It tells us that passing down those fun experiences and lovable qualities about our parents are the best way to remember them. 

The entire family taking a selfie one last time.

Modern Family has dominated as the go-to television sitcom for a decade, and it has taught all of its viewers about the importance of family and never giving up on them. The last season of the series reminds everyone about how the show is concluding and wraps up any remaining story arcs. While fans all over are saddened to see the series end, the important thing to remember is this:

“Life is full of change. Some big, some small. You can fight it or you can try to make the best of it. And that’s all a lot easier if you’ve got people who love you, helping you face whatever life throws at you.” – Jay Pritchett Jay Pritchett
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Modern Family reinforces the very stereotypes it hopes to challenge

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There was a time, not even all that long ago, when Modern Family had something to say. When the show first hit the air, it felt fresh, a change of pace from the typical sitcom fare. Debuting in 2009, it immediately stood out, competing as it did with the charming but under-watched The Middle , too far out there Community , and more cruelty-mistaken-as-irreverence sludge from the mind of Seth MacFarlane in the form of The Cleveland Show . Modern Family found the middle ground, for better and worse, that those shows didn’t, at once feeling like a typical sitcom but with two twists: the voices being given to LGBT characters, and the documentary style of filmmaking.

Now, there’s no need to paint Modern Family as some bastion of progressive beliefs on TV. It’s still a sitcom, which means its sharp edges have been sanded down to make the show more palatable for a broader audience. But the show also found its grace in not allowing its modern family to be continually linked to “issue” episodes. Instead, this was a sitcom that said life’s problems were universal, as much as they can be when your family is living the privileged lives they do in Modern Family . Over time though, that kind of storytelling, which often ignores real issues facing blended families or the LGBT community, which privileges the universal experience rather than the personal, ends up feeling empty. What’s worse though is that when Modern Family isn’t working overtime to sidestep any real issues facing its characters, it’s actively leaning into stereotypes in order to create conflict.

Last week’s episode failed miserably when it decided to pull out every Latin-American stereotype you can imagine, but this week’s installment, “A Stereotypical Day”—being in on the “joke” isn’t a good look either, Modern Family —is perhaps even more misguided. The various subplots begin harmlessly enough, with the Dunphy kids reminiscing about their summer vacations—Hayley is apparently over Andy, and Alex is failing to come back from a bad case of Mono—and Phil getting stuck in a pantry during an open house, which is perfect occasion for some of Ty Burrell’s great physical comedy and sense of timing. Then, things take a turn for the worse, as “A Stereotypical Day” shifts gears, unsuccessfully musing on issues facing the transgender community, PTSD, and race relations in America.

To be fair, Modern Family isn’t exactly looking to say anything insightful about those topics, so to hold it to some sort of political standard would be foolish. But at the same time, there’s a certain amount of responsibility that comes with trotting out hot-button topics that have a meaningful place in the cultural conversation. It’s too easy for a sitcome, or any show really, to use those topics for empty or even harmful laughs, meaning that to shrug off Modern Family’ s nonchalant approach to these stories with “well, it’s just a sitcom,” isn’t exactly fair. The show is responsible for its message, especially when it purports to be so inclusive and progressive .

So, as great as it is that “A Stereotypical Day” features a young transgender actor, it doesn’t make up for the fact that the episode itself is littered with stereotypes. This isn’t satire, nor is it the show pointing out the ignorance of some of its characters. Rather, it’s the show leaning into tired depictions of race and gender for laughs. But, like last week’s disaster in Mexico, it’s hard to find the punchline. Take Jay’s main storyline this week. On the same day that he’s having security cameras installed outside his home, a black family is moving in across the road. That sends Jay into a panic, as he doesn’t want his new neighbors to think he’s some crazy, old racist. Or, as Jay puts it to a confused (and exceedingly patient) Gloria, “you’ll never understand the stereotypes old white men face.”

As the storyline progresses and intertwines with Cam and Mitchell’s worry that Lily isn’t treating her new transgender friend Tom with respect and an open mind, there’s the potential for some intriguing nuance. There are moments where the characters actually reckon with their own prejudices and the lies that we tell ourselves about our own enlightened behavior. It’s there in the moment when Cam and Mitchell wonder if they’re more like Jay than they want to admit, and in Jay’s insight that sometimes it takes time for people to adjust to new truths. Those are interesting, complex character moments that dig a little deeper into who these people are and how they understand themselves.

Those moments never last though, and it isn’t long before “A Stereotypical Day” is back to treating important issues as fodder for jokes. There’s the running gag of Phil suffering from “PTSD” after he was locked in the pantry, even going so far as to treat Alex like a therapy dog. In a week where You’re The Worst showed off just how to tackle PTSD in a serious but still touching and funny manner, Modern Family’ s approach feels particularly hollow. But the problem with the episode isn’t just that it’s not as scathing as the material necessitates, but rather that the storylines themselves do nothing to actually subvert or overcome the stereotypes being peddled. In essence, “A Stereotypical Day” carries itself like a bit of satire that exposes the flaws in painting anyone with too broad a brushstroke, and yet it ends up enforcing the exact stereotypes it hopes to challenge.

Stray observations

  • Jay’s storyline leads to a “payoff” that involves him confusing his neighbor saying “by the way” with the pronunciation of “a beautiful African name.” Just, no, Modern Family .
  • Manny, going through some weird communism phase in order to impress a girl: “I see, fill my mouth with bougie opiates so I can’t speak for the people.” Cam: “That was a lot.”
  • “How do you ask a human not to go again?”
  • “Why do you look so satisfied? Did you just listen to an NPR story that proved you right about something?” Again, there are hints of the show dealing with self-perception when it comes to social issues, but it never goes beyond barely scratching the surface.
  • “It was actually illegal to run for Mayor without a moustache until 1980. Then again from ‘82 to ‘85.”
  • Cast & crew
  • User reviews
  • Episode aired Nov 2, 2011

Leslie Mann and Eric Stonestreet in Modern Family (2009)

Phil tries to build a treehouse, Haley struggles with writing a college admissions essay, Cameron hits on a single woman to win a bet with Mitchell, and Jay doesn't want to go out salsa danc... Read all Phil tries to build a treehouse, Haley struggles with writing a college admissions essay, Cameron hits on a single woman to win a bet with Mitchell, and Jay doesn't want to go out salsa dancing with Gloria and another couple. Phil tries to build a treehouse, Haley struggles with writing a college admissions essay, Cameron hits on a single woman to win a bet with Mitchell, and Jay doesn't want to go out salsa dancing with Gloria and another couple.

  • Jason Winer
  • Christopher Lloyd
  • Steven Levitan
  • Ed O'Neill
  • Sofía Vergara
  • Julie Bowen
  • 1 User review
  • 6 Critic reviews

Leslie Mann and Eric Stonestreet in Modern Family (2009)

  • Jay Pritchett

Sofía Vergara

  • Gloria Delgado-Pritchett

Julie Bowen

  • Claire Dunphy

Ty Burrell

  • Phil Dunphy

Jesse Tyler Ferguson

  • Mitchell Pritchett

Eric Stonestreet

  • Cameron Tucker

Sarah Hyland

  • Haley Dunphy

Nolan Gould

  • Luke Dunphy

Rico Rodriguez

  • Manny Delgado

Leslie Mann

  • All cast & crew
  • Production, box office & more at IMDbPro

Did you know

  • Trivia Eric Stonestreet (Cam) is straight in real life, meaning that in this episode he is a straight man pretending to be a gay man pretending to be a straight man.
  • Goofs When Jay, Gloria, Shorty and Darlene are eating dinner, Jay keeps taking bites off his fork and continuing to chew, even though there's no food on it.

Manny Delgado : [When teaching Jay how to salsa dance] Okay, stop marching. You're dancing, not invading Poland.

  • Connections Featured in The 64th Primetime Emmy Awards (2012)
  • Soundtracks Modern Family (uncredited) Composed and Performed by Gabriel Mann

User reviews 1

  • November 2, 2011 (United States)
  • United States
  • Levitan / Lloyd
  • 20th Century Fox Television
  • See more company credits at IMDbPro

Technical specs

  • Runtime 22 minutes
  • Dolby Digital

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Published: Jan 31, 2024

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Table of contents

Overview of modern family, challenging traditional stereotypes, examining family dynamics and relationships, addressing societal issues and taboos, breaking gender norms and roles, subverting cultural and racial stereotypes, representing diverse family structures, highlighting the importance of communication and emotional connection, tackling social issues through humor and wit, promoting acceptance and inclusivity.

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Modern Family recap: Season 8, Episode 4

Phil befriends a local weatherman (Nathan Fillion), and Manny crafts a personal video for his college application

Phil and Manny were the stars of this episode. Phil’s character worked like a well-oiled machine, incorporating a little of everything he does best. We got the comic relief of his effeminate and blundering personality, and the sweetness of his earnest side.

Phil is taking his real estate wisdom to TV for a real estate segment on the local news. He tries to do his own makeup, but ends up looking like a woman (Haley: “Is this how we find out you’re transitioning?”). Luckily, one of Haley’s many talents is makeup, and she goes with him as his makeup artist. At the station, they meet vain, smooth-talking weatherman Rainer Shine (the delightful Nathan Fillion). Phil is in awe of him and wants to be his best friend. And, even though Rainer seems like a stereotypical Cool Guy, he seems to get along with Phil, too. By the way, Phil looked in the wrong cameras during his entire segment.

Unfortunately Rainer compromises their budding friendship by kissing Haley. Phil tells him off, but immediately regrets it, and Haley encourages Phil to go to him. They’re enacting the full plot of a romcom, and it’s great. For Phil’s grand romantic gesture, he shows up to Rainer’s live broadcast in the middle of a heavy storm to apologize. Rainer forgives him, and they can now continue their beautiful friendship.

Meanwhile, it’s time for Manny to apply for college, and he wants to go to Juilliard for playwriting. Buckle your seat belts, readers: Here comes a Modern Family Hamilton reference. Manny records a Hamilton parody video as part of his application, complete with rewritten lyrics to “Alexander Hamilton.” But apparently he didn’t check to see if this idea was taken before shooting the whole thing. To his dismay, the internet is full of Hamilton parodies created for college applications. He has to come up with another video fast.

Jay has the idea to highlight Manny’s diversity by taking him to a bad neighborhood to film a video about his experience as a child of immigrants. This is bending the truth though: the Delgado-Pritchett clan is upper middle class and lives in a nice neighborhood. As Manny points out, he has a calligraphy tutor. Manny isn’t comfortable lying to Juilliard, so he goes back to square one. What happens next is a classic heartwarming Modern Family moment. Manny makes a video about being inspired by his parents: an immigrant mother who spent years raising him on her own, and a father who started his own business. It’s sweet, and luckily for Manny, it’s also college admissions catnip. It was a sweet ending to Manny’s story line for this episode, if a little too abrupt. If Luke took a page out of Manny’s book and wrote his college essay about his diverse family, maybe he would have a prayer of getting into a decent college?

Gloria’s story line was a big miss in this episode. Since Joe needs help pronouncing his Rs, she takes him to a speech therapist, who takes it upon herself to help Gloria with her sometimes indecipherable Columbian accent. The joke here is that Gloria speaks in a weirdly stilted American accent for the rest of the episode.

Speaking of horrible people, Lily is merciless in this episode. She’s determined to get rid of their football player houseguest Dwight, so she plants a liquor bottle under his bed. Mitch and Cam enlist their stripper friend to wear his cop costume to the house and pretend to arrest Dwight, hoping that Lily will feel bad and confess. But she doesn’t break! She’s absolutely remorseless. She’s like Mitch, but worse.

Odds and Ends:

Episode Grade: C+

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Check Out Alex Dunphy's Full College Essay from Latest MODERN FAMILY Episode

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ABC recently aired an unconventional episode of their hit show MODERN FAMILY, which took place entirely on Claire Dunphy's computer. The episode also featured Alex's interesting college entry essay. Check it out below!

Nietzsche believed that most culture exists purely to distract us from the truth. If he is to be believed, then the context of our experience matters little when compared to the content of our experience. For this reason, I believe Yale will provide the best possible opportunities to expand as a scholar, pupil and person. No institution, however dedicated and prestigious, can instill a desire for betterment where none exists and I know you're not reading this, mom. If allowed to join the student body, I will diligently strive to make the most of every advantage, both in school and beyond campus. This is not to say that I lack hobbies. In addition to graduating in the top two-percent of my class, I have also participated in many extracurricular activities. I followed my love of the cello to join a quartet three years ago. My interest in renewable energy drove me to enter the Annual Pasadena Robotics Competition in 2010, build my own small robot, and compete as that year's youngest female one-person team. In addition, I have co-captained numerous Mathlete and Mock Trial teams, and spent my free periods as a teachers' assistant. If admitted, I am certain my varied interests will find a prosperous foothold at Yale, whether through my fellow students or honored professors.

About MODERN FAMILY

Phil Dunphy is a loving husband/devoted dad who dreams big while making the most out of the little things in life. Claire is his grounded, responsible, regimented (but in a good way) wife. These two are the perfect mix when it comes to raising their three way-different kids. Haley is the independent, eye-rolling teen. Middle sister Alex is wise beyond her years. Little brother Luke, well, isn't. At least, that's what he'd like you to think.

Claire's gruff, no-nonsense dad, Jay Pritchett, married a much younger Colombian beauty named Gloria. Her passion for life has rubbed off on her young son Manny, who marches to the beat of his own drum, usually in a burgundy dinner jacket. Jay has done the parent thing with his two adult kids and is currently enjoying Round 2 as dad to Manny. Round 3 is just around the corner now that Gloria has announced there's a new baby headed their way!

Jay's lawyer son, Mitchell, embraced a major life change when he and his carefree, TROPHY WIFE partner, Cameron, adopted their super-cute Vietnamese baby, Lily. They're learning all the parenting ropes as they go. Attempts to adopt another child haven't panned out. Fortunately, they have the loving support of their extended, eclectic, funny family to keeping them going strong.

As we already mentioned, MODERN FAMILY has won a bunch of Emmy Awards, including Outstanding Comedy Series three years in a row. We're sure the accolades will keep rolling in as the family continues to change, grow and always keep us laughing.

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Today's "Modern Family": A Textual Analysis of Gender in the Domestic Sitcom

Type of degree.

Communication and Journalism

This thesis utilizes a textual analysis with an emphasis on gender to analyze the Emmy award-winning sitcom, Modern Family. The program’s overwhelming popularity among television audiences and media critics alike gives reason for scholarly attention. This study answers the question, in what ways does the sitcom, Modern Family, communicate our culture’s dominant ideology about family. The textual analysis revealed that regardless of the illusion of modernity, each of the families within the domestic sitcom supported the traditional, nuclear family.

http://hdl.handle.net/10415/2757

The New York Times

Motherlode | “modern family” is us, “modern family” is us.

Members of the cast of “Modern Family.”

Television cameras are often mirrors, reflecting back the message of the times. In an article in the Styles section this weekend, my colleague Bruce Feiler looks at the hit show “Modern Family” through that lens, asking “what does ‘Modern Family’ say about modern families?”

The version of ourselves we see in this particular mirror is an eclectic one, he writes, built as it is “around a new fangled family tree. Patriarch Jay 
Pritchett, his Colombian trophy wife, Gloria, and her son, Manny. Jay’s grown son Mitchell, his partner, Cam, and their adopted Vietnamese daughter. And Jay’s high-strung daughter, Claire, her goofball husband, Phil, and their three suburban kids.”

This fictional modern family looks inward, more than outward, Feiler writes. Back in the ’70s, the hottest shows — “All in the Family,” “Maude,” “The Jeffersons” — tackled subjects like rape, abortion, infidelity and racism, while today’s most popular TV family, is “tapping into a different, more self-regarding anxiety: less focused on how families interact with the outside world; more centered on how they function internally.”

In an essay in The New York Times Magazine a few weeks ago, Judy Warner reached much the same conclusion about real families, writing that mothers in particular are far more focused on home than on marching to change the world. She used increased interest in introspective activities like yoga to make her case, while Feiler turns to popular culture to illustrate his. On “Modern Family” as in modern families, he writes “the roiling topics of politics and religion are kept off the Thanksgiving table. The simmering topics of sexuality, technology and dysfunction are kept on. The goal is not to heal the world; it’s to heal thyself. Specifically, to preserve the ideal of the family.”

You rejected Warner’s argument in the comments on Motherlode, somewhat offended by the suggestion of insularity. Do you find Feiler’s example more compelling? Do you recognize your own family in the Pritchetts and the Tuckers?

What's Next

Modern Family Analysis

The popularity of family TV shows has been prevalent for decades, and regardless of whether audiences have been aware of it or not, they have always presented a message via the depiction of the so-called regular family. With shows such as  Brady Bunch  and  Leave it to Beaver,  as well as  The Simpsons  and  Modern Family,  society has evolved from depicting the nuclear, functional family that is often patriarchial as the ideal to heavily promoting the acceptance of the existence of no ideal. Instead, family TV shows depict, more often than not in a funny light, the everyday challenges of a family in the 21 st  century. The societal perception of the family has drastically changed since family TV shows first to gain popularity, and they will continue to undergo changes as their prevalence continues. However, as family depictions in the media continue to change, the quintessential family is starting to get eroded out of focus, with the acceptance of every form of the family becoming increasingly prevalent.

Modern Family  offers a portrayal of the life of a 21 st -century family, and it features a mother comparing herself to her stepmother, which is similar to how mothers in society normally compare how they raise their children with how other women do the same. The shows centers around a blended family, whose type has become increasingly common in today’s society. The teen girls present in  Modern Family  are representations of society’s perception of beauty and intelligence, and more significantly, the rarity of them mixing. Sexy, loud stereotypes regarding women of Latina descent are reinforced in  Modern Family  as has been the norm in the majority of current TV shows, which is unfortunate. Lastly, relationships pertaining to the LGBTQ community have continued to gain acceptance, with more and more people embracing them. The analysis of the portrayals detailed above in  Modern Family  can help provide an understanding of the 21 st -century society that they exist within and the interactions they have as they go about their lives.

Many consider  Modern Family  to be one of, if not the most influential family TV show in recent history, with the show offering a portrayal of a dysfunctional family living in the 21 st  century (Smith-Driggs, 2017). ABC’s website details the show as revolving around the Pritchett-Dunphy-Tucker clan, which is a large family that is wonderfully blended. The three families mentioned above offer the audience a true and often comical perception into the sometimes twisted, sometimes warm, reflection of the 21 st -century family (Smith-Driggs, 2017). The TV show depicts the new versions of the family in a comical light, and society is gradually becoming an actual reflection of  Modern Family,  with more and more families in this day and age straying moving away from the ideal perception of a family and adopting a more dysfunctional model.

Modern Family  hails from an extended line of well-received family TV shows, all offering a depiction of a typical family within society at the time of airing (Smith-Driggs, 2017). For example,  Leave it to Beaver  was set in the 1950s and featured the portrayal of a functional, Caucasian, middle-class family. The shows that were set in the era in question were, more often than not, concerned with depicting the conventional patriarchy and the nuclear family unit and it involved the reinforcement of gender norms such as girls always having to look pretty, fooling around being in the nature of boys, and mothers doing all the housework while fathers earn money. Changes in culture and families resulted in a change in TV shows too, and that became evident when the national divorce rate increased in the 1960s, creating increasingly separated families (Smith-Driggs, 2017). Thus,  The Brady Bunch  emerged, with each episode of the show’s five seasons portraying a different situation in the family unit, but the show touched upon limited matters that can be deemed socially controversial.

During the same era,  The Cosby Show  emerged, and it offered a look into a functional family of African-American descent, with the show also offering a look at how similar a Black family was to a white family (Smith-Driggs, 2017). Doing so was meaningful, given that it was a fact that that the majority of audiences found it hard to understand at the time.  Roseanne  offered the first depiction of a family that can be perceived as realistic in the late 1980s and early 1990s. The show featured both parents working away from home, with the lead characters also being overweight, and also featuring a household that was female-dominated, as well as gay characters (Smith-Driggs, 2017). Ever since the emergence of  Roseanne,  there has been an increased encouragement for acceptance of every family form within the media, more so with regards to LGBTQ relationships.

All the shows detailed above have contributed to the prevalence of  Modern Family,  and similar to the other family TV shows, it is riddled with subtle messages pertaining to the acceptance of every type of family relationship, regardless of how different it is from the accepted norms (Smith-Driggs, 2017).  Modern Family  focuses on the stereotypes centered around blended families, the LGBTQ community, Latina women, and motherhood. Claire Dunphy is depicted as a woman with a loving spouse, two daughters, one of whom dresses well, while the other is an unattractive genius and a son who is portrayed as a typical teenage boy with a knack for having fun and messing around (Smith-Driggs, 2017). While Claire might be perceived to have it all, she, unfortunately, has a habit of comparing herself to her stepmother Gloria, and that makes her view herself as a frantic mother who is always rushing around to help her offspring with something.

Claire’s perception of Gloria is that of a beautiful and composed mother, and while the former does not resent the latter, the comparisons of her shortcomings to Gloria’s success slightly strain their relationship (Smith-Driggs, 2017). Such a relationship can be equated to mothers in the 21 st  century comparing themselves to other mothers, especially those with a heavy online presence. These mothers often present their best selves online as they go about promoting commodities and offering motherhood tips. While the mention of a mother blogger can be perceived as an extreme example of mothers making comparisons between themselves and others, the majority of mothers find it relatable feeling less capable than other mothers. Therefore, with family TV shows striving to ensure that family depictions are relatable to the audience, Claire and Gloria’s relationship is given much emphasis (Smith-Driggs, 2017).

Modern Family’s  other relatable premise is its depiction of a stepfamily, with the show featuring Claire’s father divorcing a woman called Dede and marrying Gloria. Jay and Gloria’s blended family can be perceived as a representation of increasing norms pertaining to stepfamilies in today’s society (Smith-Driggs, 2017). Research by the United States Census Bureau revealed that 1300 new stepfamilies are being created on a daily basis, with more than half of families in the U.S. being re-coupled or remarried, and one out of two marriages concluding in divorce.  Modern Family  offers one of the several modern depictions of blended families, with increasing divorce rates contributing towards the increased acceptance and expectations of such families.

The majority of TV shows and films are known to offer depictions of the stereotypical ditz, gorgeous shopper, and the intelligent, but unattractive tomboy.  Modern Family  is no different as the stereotypes in question are reinforced by Claire’s daughters Alex and Haley, with the former playing the tomboy and the latter the ditz (Smith-Driggs, 2017). The majority of family shows depict such a sibling setup because the tomboys are meant to watch their older sisters’ behaviors and actions while frowning upon them, and attempting everything they can to make sure that they do not turn out the same. Thus, the tomboys can be perceived as a representation of the opposite side of the so-called feminine spectrum (Smith-Driggs, 2017). The depiction of such stereotypes offers a glimpse into society, given that it is the belief of many that a woman who is both intelligent and beautiful is next to impossible to find.

Of all the statements made by the show, the biggest statement that  Modern Family  can be perceived to make is via the show’s depiction of gay marriage (Rosen, 2020). Jay’s only son ad Claire’s brother, Mitchell, is a spouse to another man called Cam, and the two have adopted a baby girl named Lily. Over the last two decades, the media’s perception of gay relationships has been unnatural and uncomfortable. However, such relationships have continued to become the norm, with many people embracing such life partnerships. The depiction of LGBTQ relationships in the media continues pushing for equality, while also promoting the acceptance of every type of sexual orientation (Rosen, 2020). In  Modern Family,  Jay was initially portrayed as resentful of the fact that his son, Mitchel, was a member of the LGBTQ community, he eventually grew to embrace it (Rosen, 2020). The father-son situation detailed above mirrors society, given that while society once resented people with different sexual orientations, it has gradually learned to be accepting of those differences, while also embracing them.

However, while  Modern Family  might be looking to lessen the multiple stereotypes pertaining to the typical family, the show heavily reinforces one significant stereotype, that of Latina women (Rosen, 2020). Research has revealed that some of the most significant stereotypes about women of Latina descent include the fact that they enjoy showing cleavage, they have high-pitched voices that are loud and obnoxious, they all speak with accents, they are immigrants, they are staunch Catholics, they have long, wavy hair and that they hail from dangerous origins. The only Latina woman in  Modern Family  is Gloria and she reinforces every one of the stereotypes detailed above. One of the show’s episodes features Gloria’s mother and sister visiting for the christening of Gloria’s baby, and it is an episode that features increased reinforcement of the stereotype in question (Rosen, 2020). Unfortunately, Gloria’s stereotypical portrayal is just one of many in family TV shows pertaining to the depiction of Latina women. Statistics have shown that the Hispanic population within the United States, which is more than 17% of the nation’s population, yearns for TV shows that depict their culture in a realistic manner, and not stereotypically.

While the various families depicted in  Modern Family  have their differences, they all share a commonality amongst themselves, which is that every one of the parents is seriously dedicated to their children (Rosen, 2020). The show portrays how family always comes first, and that it ultimately brings them together. Therefore,  Modern Family  begs the question: does the “family comes first” motto fall in line with what society perceives as normal or does it contradict it? However, there is no denying that the TV show teaches the message of acceptance to all who watch it has contributed significantly to the typical family being perceived in more than one mold (Smith-Driggs, 2017). A mother and father with two offspring are no longer viewed as the classic family and expectations of it have diminished. Instead, biracial families, single-parent households, divorced parents, LGBTQ families and many more are all being perceived as normal families. While it has been more recently seen in regards to the LGBTQ community, the continued acceptance in question will continue to become prevalent to various households and all people.  Modern Family  has both contributed to and hindered the aforementioned growth (Smith-Driggs, 2017). The show’s presentation of every form of family, which includes families that make mistakes, are plagued with problems, and still, love each other, is enough for it to be regarded as one of the most influential family TV shows of the 21 st  century.

Modern Family  details the daily struggles of a typical family living in the 21 st  century. The TV show depicts the new versions of the family in a comical light, and society is gradually becoming an actual reflection of  Modern Family,  with more and more families in this day and age straying moving away from the ideal perception of a family and adopting a more dysfunctional model.  Modern Family  focuses on the stereotypes centered around blended families, the LGBTQ community, Latina women, and motherhood. The depiction of such stereotypes offers a glimpse into society, given that it is the belief of many that a woman who is both intelligent and beautiful is next to impossible to find. the biggest statement that  Modern Family  can be perceived to make is via the show’s depiction of gay marriage. Over the last two decades, the media’s perception of gay relationships has been unnatural and uncomfortable. However, such relationships have continued to become the norm, with many people embracing such life partnerships. In  Modern Family,  Jay was initially portrayed as resentful of the fact that his son, Mitchel, was a member of the LGBTQ community, he eventually grew to embrace it. The depiction of LGBTQ relationships in the media continues pushing for equality, while also promoting the acceptance of every type of sexual orientation. However, while  Modern Family  might be looking to lessen the multiple stereotypes pertaining to the typical family, the show heavily reinforces one significant stereotype, that of Latina women.

Rosen, L. (2021). ‘Modern Family,’ a longtime Emmy favorite, paved the way and stepped aside. Los Angeles Times. Retrieved 6 December 2021, from https://www.latimes.com/entertainment-arts/tv/story/2020-06-18/modern-family-says-goodbye-after-11-seasons.

Smith-Driggs, E. (2021). Modern Family promotes the acceptance of all types of families – The New York Experience. Nybyu.com. Retrieved 6 December 2021, from http://nybyu.com/pop-culture-analysis/modern-family-promotes-the-acceptance-of-all-types-of-families/.

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Modern Love

Coming Out as a Modern Family (Updated With Podcast)

modern family video essay

By Maria Bello

  • Nov. 29, 2013

UPDATED: You can now hear this essay read by the actress and writer Maria Bello in Modern Love: The Podcast. Look for the “play” button below or subscribe on iTunes or Stitcher .

When my 12-year-old son, Jackson, asked me if there was something I wasn’t telling him, I replied, “There are a lot of things I don’t tell you.”

“Like what?”

“Adult stuff.”

He persisted: “What kind of adult stuff?”

This was the moment I had been anticipating and dreading for months. “Like romantic stuff,” I said, fumbling for words.

“What kind of romantic stuff?”

“Well,” I said. “Like how sometimes you can be friends with someone, and then it turns romantic, and then you’re friends again. Like with Dad and me. Or romantic like Bryn and me were, and then he and I became friends.”

“So are you romantic with anyone right now?” he asked.

I took a deep breath, knowing that my answer, and his response, would have an impact on our lives for a very long time.

He was right; I was with someone romantically and I hadn’t told him. I had become involved with a woman who was my best friend, and, as it happens, a person who is like a godmother to my son.

How and when should I tell him? When I explained the situation to a therapist, she smiled and said, “Your son may say a lot of things about you when he’s older, but he will never say his mother was boring.”

Her advice was to wait until he asked. And now here he was, asking.

About a year before this conversation, I had been sitting in my garden in California, looking through photos and old journals I have kept since childhood. From a green tattered notebook with ink hearts drawn on it to the one I started in Haiti while helping after the earthquake there in January 2010, the journals told stories that seemed woven together by a similar theme.

I read about the handful of men and the one woman I had been in romantic relationships with, passages rife with pain and angst. It seemed when I was physically attracted to someone, I would put them in the box of being my “soul mate” and then be crushed when things didn’t turn out as I had hoped.

I read about the two men I fell for while working on films. I was sure each was my soul mate, a belief fueled by sexual attraction that made me certain I was in love, only to find that when the filming ended, so did the relationship. And I read about the man who asked me to marry him four years ago over the phone, before we had even kissed. Three months later we were in his kitchen throwing steaks at each other’s heads in anger.

As I continued to look through photos, I came across a black-and-white one of my best friend and me taken on New Year’s Eve. We looked so happy, I couldn’t help but smile. I remembered how we had met two years before; she was sitting in a bar wearing a fedora and speaking in her Zimbabwean accent.

We had an immediate connection but didn’t think of it as romantic or sexual. She was one of the most beautiful, charming, brilliant and funny people I had ever met, but it didn’t occur to me, until that soul-searching moment in my garden, that we could perhaps choose to love each other romantically.

What had I been waiting for all of these years? She is the person I like being with the most, the one with whom I am most myself.

The next time I saw her, in New York, I shared my confusing feelings, and we began the long, painful, wonderful process of trying to figure out what our relationship was supposed to be.

First, how would it affect my son? He trusted Clare. He loved her. He had never met most of the men I had been in love with and had no idea I had been with a woman as well. Second, how would it affect my career? I have never defined myself by whom I slept with, but I know others have and would.

It’s hard for me even to define the term “partner.” For five years I considered my partner to be a friend then in his 70s, John Calley, with whom I talked daily. He was the one who picked me up each time I had a breakdown about another failed romance. Because we were platonic, did that make him any less of a partner?

And I have never understood the distinction of “primary” partner. Does that imply we have secondary and tertiary partners, too? Can my primary partner be my sister or child or best friend, or does it have to be someone I am having sex with? I have two friends who are sisters who have lived together for 15 years and raised a daughter. Are they not partners because they don’t have sex? And many married couples I know haven’t had sex for years. Are they any less partners?

My feelings for Clare aren’t the same as the butterflies-in-the-stomach, angst-ridden love I have felt before; they are much deeper than that. As we grew closer, my desire for her grew stronger until, after a few months, I decided to share the truth of our relationship with my large, Italian-Polish, “traditional” Philadelphia family.

My father’s response came between puffs of his cigar while we sat on the roof of a casino in Atlantic City. “She’s a good girl, good for you,” he said. My mother and family echoed his sentiments. Maybe they weren’t so traditional after all.

My feelings about attachment and partnership have always been that they are fluid and evolving. Jack’s father, Dan, will always be my partner because we share Jack. Dan is the best father and the most wonderful man I’ve known. Just because our relationship is nonsexual doesn’t make him any less of a partner. We share the same core values, including putting our son first. My more recent ex, Bryn, remains my partner because we share our activism. And Clare will always be my partner because she is also my best friend.

This past summer I was very ill. At one point it looked as if I might not survive. But the people who were at my bedside every day at the hospital were many of my life partners: my mother, Jackson, Dan, my brother Chris and Clare.

Clare rarely left my side and called every doctor and connection she knew to help figure out what was wrong with me. It was Dan who brought our son to see me every day and kept him feeling safe in such a scary situation. It was Chris whose arms I fell into when I couldn’t get up. It was my mother who stroked my head for hours at a time. And it was Jackson who walked me through the halls with my IV and made me breathe.

So back to Jackson’s question, with me sitting on the edge of his bed: Was I romantic with anyone right now?

I exhaled and finally said it: “Clare.”

He looked at me for what seemed like an eternity and then broke into a huge, warm smile. “Mom, love is love, whatever you are,” he said with wisdom beyond his years. (Yes, he obviously attends one of those progressive schools in Los Angeles!)

I loved him so much for saying that. “But Jack, I’m a little scared,” I said. “When I was younger, people judged you if you were in a romantic relationship with a person of the same sex, and some still do. So I’m not sure how to deal with this. But we’ll figure it out together.”

And we have figured it out together: Jack, Clare, Dan and I. It’s a rare weekend when we aren’t piled in the same car, driving to one of Jack’s soccer tournaments. Dan makes fun of Clare for getting lost and she makes sure he always has the umbrellas, sunscreen, water nuts and whatever else we might need in a nuclear disaster.

We have dinner together almost every night. As I write this, we’re basking in the afterglow of Dan’s 50th birthday party that Clare, Jackson, and I gave, which was attended by his family and mine and many other people I consider partners in one aspect of my life or another. It was a room of celebration and unconditional love.

Mostly, the four of us laugh a lot together. Jackson has gotten us hooked on “Modern Family,” and in each episode he tries to figure out if Dan is Phil or Jay and if Clare is Gloria or Mitchell. (He has no doubt about which character I am: Claire.)

So I would like to consider myself a “whatever,” as Jackson said. Whomever I love, however I love them, whether they sleep in my bed or not, or whether I do homework with them or share a child with them, “love is love.” And I love our modern family.

Maybe, in the end, a modern family is just a more honest family.

Maria Bello is an activist and actor whose most recent film is “Prisoners.”

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This Is Not the Relationship I Ordered:   Divorce leaves a woman with a surprising realization  about who has been the love of her life.

My Husband Is Two Years Older Than My Son:  A woman’s 19-year marital age gap feels treacherous — and is the best thing that’s ever happened to her .

Please Stay, Baby. Please?: The grief of miscarriage is largely invisible. And with each loss, the longing multiplies .

My Bad-Times-Only Boyfriend: Why is a woman’s long-ago fling suddenly acting as if he’s her husband ?

A Family Dinner With My Wife and Girlfriend: Learning to love two women at once  — one living with Alzheimer’s — is a challenge and a blessing.

Our Last, Impossible Conversation: Artificial intelligence gives a widow another chance to talk to her long-lost husband .

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The Modern American Family

 key trends in marriage and family life.

The American family has undergone significant change in recent decades. There is no longer one predominant family form, and Americans are experiencing family life in increasingly diverse ways.

In 1970, 67% of Americans ages 25 to 49 were living with their spouse and one or more children younger than 18.

Over the past five decades, that share has dropped to 37%.

With the drop in the share of adults living with a spouse and children, there has been an increase in other types of family living arrangements, like unmarried adults raising children.

A recent survey finds that the U.S. public is more accepting of some family types than others . And, broadly speaking, Americans are more pessimistic than optimistic about the future of the institution of marriage and the family.

What’s behind the change in family structure?

There are several factors that have contributed to these changes. Americans are marrying later in life, and a rising share have never been married.

% of U.S. adults ages 18 and older who are married or have never been married

Source: Pew Research Center analysis of 1970-2000 decennial census and 2010-2021 American Community Survey (IPUMS).

While the overall share of married adults has declined, certain types of marriages have become more common over time. Since the 1970s, a growing share of Americans are in interracial or interethnic marriages.

% of U.S. married adults ages 18 and older who are intermarried

Note: Intermarried refers to marriages between a Hispanic and a non-Hispanic spouse, or marriages between non-Hispanic spouses who come from different racial groups. Source: Pew Research Center analysis of 1970-2000 decennial census and 2010-2021 American Community Survey (IPUMS).

In 2015, same-sex marriages became legal nationally, and since then there has also been an increase in the proportion of Americans in same-sex marriages. In 2021, there were over 700,000 same-sex married couples in the United States , accounting for approximately 1% of all married couples. 

% of U.S. married adults ages 18 and older in a same-sex marriage

Source: Pew Research Center analysis of 2015-2021 American Community Survey (IPUMS).

Changes in fertility patterns have also had a significant impact on family dynamics. Compared with their counterparts in the 1970s, women today have fewer children.

The relationship between marriage and parenthood has also shifted, as more women are having children without being married .

Taken together, these changes help explain why married couples raising children together is no longer the norm.

Let’s take a closer look at the changes in family life over the past decades to understand how the American family has evolved and what it looks like today:

Differences by education, race and ethnicity

What form a family takes is increasingly shaped by educational attainment and varies significantly across racial and ethnic groups.

Today, individuals with a bachelor’s degree are much more likely to be married than those with less education – a change from the 1970s, when adults with a high school diploma were as likely as college graduates to be married. There are also growing racial and ethnic disparities since that time, with Asian and White adults increasingly more likely to be married than those who are Black or Hispanic.

Explore the data to see how these differences play out in American families. To start, click on a tab to display   data on the share of Americans who are married; the number of children women have, on average; or   the share of children living with two married parents. Then, choose a filter to show differences by education or by race and ethnicity.

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The Modern Day Family Essay

Introduction, significant changes in families, are families becoming weaker or different, the concept of family has grown stronger, reference list.

Presently, there has been a re-orientation from the nuclear family model of the 1960s resulting in a shift from collective happiness to individual-oriented families which prefer the concepts of personal freedoms as well as their individual happiness. It is the opinion of this paper that the changing nature of the present day social environment, in the form of work constraints and perceived social obligations, causes the problems that American society faces today.

Presently, the concept of “family” within the United States has taken a significant shift wherein the traditional nuclear family has given way to individualism instead of collectivism. This has, supposedly, caused several of the problems society faces today such as increased instances of divorce, extra-marital affairs, domestic violence and the spread of various crimes. Instead of a tight-knit social group, families are increasingly composed of disparate individuals who do not consider their families as the crux of their lives (Ruggles, 1994). It is the opinion of this paper that the changing nature of the present day social environment, in the form of work constraints and perceived social obligations, causes the problems that American society faces today.

The main significant change in families since the 1960s has been a re-orientation from collective happiness to individual-oriented families which prefer the concepts of personal freedoms as well as their individual happiness (Ruggles, 2009). While families are presently considered as a social unit, its individual members are, more often than not, concerned with their personal endeavors in the form of work constraints and their perceived social obligations (Gerstel & Gallagher, 1993).

As a result, the concept of “family” is no longer a central tenet in their lives and merely acts as a means of describing the social obligations of a parent to their child and vice-versa. While elements associated with individualism and collectivism do exist in any culture, there are variances wherein one culture may lean towards individualism or collectivism (Holahan, 2010). In some cases, one culture may espouse collectivism in one generation and shift to individualism in another. This is what occurred in the U.S. wherein a change in the social environment advocated individual achievement and a focus on being independent from one’s parents. Work and social obligations shifted the current orientation of people in the U.S. from family oriented to individually oriented.

From a collectivist perspective that focuses on family bonds, it can be stated that families are getting weaker; however, the concept of what constitutes a family has been changing within American society. For example, single parent families are a more familiar concept now than they were in the 1960s. Not only that, gay parents are now legally allowed to adopt children which creates a whole new dynamic on the concept of the traditional nuclear family (Khimm, 2015).

While it is true that families are more individualistic, this altered dynamic has given rise to new social norms. Examples of this come in the form of greater acceptability of sexual promiscuity, the prevalence of single women who are focused more on their careers as well as people opting to get married later on in life (Timmermann, 2013). These are social concepts that would have been considered as horrendous during the 1960s yet are now thought of as commonplace.

While it is true that individualism has overtaken collectivism in the present day structure of families, this does not mean that families have grown weaker. The sheer variety of family types is simply a reflection of how American society has grown and evolved over the years resulting in iterations that are quite distinct from how they were in the 1960s.

The modern day family is simply the result of changing social norms with how the concept of “family” is perceived. As such, the variety, freedoms, and complexity of present day families have made them stronger since it has allowed people to adapt to the way in which society has changed over the years.

Gerstel, N., & Gallagher, S. K. (1993). Kinkeeping and Distress: Gender, Recipients of Care, and Work-Family Conflict. Journal Of Marriage & Family , 55 (3), 598-608.

Holahan, J. (2010, September 28). My Nuclear Family. Christian Science Monitor . p. N.PAG.

Khimm, S. (2015). The New Nuclear Family. New Republic , 246 (11), 8-10.

Ruggles, S. (2009). Reconsidering the Northwest European Family System: Living Arrangements of the Aged in Comparative Historical Perspective. Population & Development Review , 35 (2), 249-273.

Ruggles, S. (1994). The transformation of American family structure. American Historical Review , 99 (1), 103.

Timmermann, S. (2013). What Ever Happened to the Nuclear Family? Impact of a Changing America on Financial Services. Journal Of Financial Service Professionals , 67 (1), 27-29.

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