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Julia de Raadt
Head of research and lead admissions expert, table of contents, vague college essay prompts.
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There are many questions on a college application that may seem incredibly open-ended. Some are not straightforward, so it can feel like they are meant to trick you. But really, these questions are designed to give the you the opportunity to express your creativity and your passions. Let’s discuss how to approach and ace vague college essay prompts. With the right framework, you can knock it out of the park!
Many colleges ask you to “give us your top 10” or “a list of your favorites” and many students are left saying, “Top 10 of what? Favorite what?!?” It can be easy to stress over these questions and try to tailor your answer to what you think that specific college wants to hear. But there are better ways to go about it.
1. There is no wrong answer.
Just because you are applying to become a Chemistry major, doesn’t mean you have to list your top 10 favorite elements on the periodic table. You can just as easily list your favorite songs, NBA players, types of dogs, or movie characters. There is no designed direction for you to take! With this question the college is giving you an opportunity to be as creative and original as possible. With any vague college essay prompts, think about what part of your personality you can demonstrate, and go from there.
2. Respond in ways that reflect who you are.
Whatever your answer may be, you should make sure that it is reflective of your interests, skills and/or passions. It should be another aspect of your application that helps tell your story. For my application to Wake Forest I provided a list of the top 10 places that were most meaningful to me. In the interview I was actually asked about my list and to explain it in more detail. I was able to go through each location I listed and describe how it shaped me as a person. I was able to explain my three week home-stay in Salamanca, Spain and how it reflected my passion for travel as well as my interest in learning about new cultures. This gives the college insight to who you are and what you value.
3. Try to differentiate yourself.
Most questions on college applications are straightforward and the format of the student’s answers varies only slightly. When colleges add a vague question on their application, you should take advantage of the opportunity to separate yourself from other candidates. Rather than spending time thinking about what the college wants you to say, you should spend that time trying to be as original as possible! You don’t need to make something up, since you still want to make your answer relevant to your interests. But innovation shows the college that you are an outside-of-the-box thinker while still adding to your own personal story.
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300+ Best Argumentative Essay Ideas & Topics (2024)
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How to Write a Strong Topic Sentence + Examples
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What’s Covered:
- What Is a Topic Sentence?
- 5 Steps to Writing a Good Topic Sentence
Elements of a Good Topic Sentence
Common pitfalls to avoid.
- Where To Get Your Essay Edited For Free
Crafting the perfect essay takes time and dedication. There are so many elements you have to worry about, such as tone, purpose, and correct spelling and grammar. Writing a strong topic sentences is another critical part in writing a cohesive essay.
Without a strong topic sentence, you risk losing your reader and perhaps part of your grade. If it’s a college admissions essay, then you need it to be as strong as possible to back up your application. Learn about what steps you should take to write a strong topic sentence.
What Is a Topic Sentence?
People often confuse a topic sentence with a thesis statement. A thesis statement is typically at the end of your opening paragraph, that dictates the main argument you’ll be making in your essay.
Throughout your essay, you’ll have multiple topic sentences, as each paragraph should start off with one. This beginning sentence is used to direct the topic of the paragraph and outline the flow of the following sentences. It’s used to help guide your reader and to continue to keep them hooked on your overall essay. Without topic sentences, your essay will be unorganized, lack transitions, and sound very choppy. To write a good topic sentence, there are several steps to take.
Writing a Good Topic Sentence: 5 Steps
Step 1: decide what you’re going to write about..
When you see the essay prompt, you’ll have some time to think through what you want to say and why. You have to decide if it’s a persuasive essay, informative, narrative, or descriptive. Determine your purpose for writing the essay after reading through the prompt. Whether it’s an assignment for school or if it’s to get into college, you need to make sure you have that purpose clearly outlined.
Step 2: Create a thesis statement.
One of the first things you need to do is create a thesis statement. This is typically a sentence with three points that you’ll back up throughout your essay.
For example: The Office became a cultural phenomenon because it spurred the careers of many of today’s successful movie stars, it talked about situations that most American workers can relate to, and even 15 years later, offers funny, relevant content that helps to break down prejudices.
You then use that thesis statement to create an essay around the points you want to make.
Step 3: Make your essay outline.
Once you have the points you want to make within your thesis statement hammered out, make an outline for your essay. This is where you’ll start to create your topic sentence for each paragraph. You want to clearly state the main idea of that paragraph in the very first sentence. From there, you back up that main idea with facts and reputable sources. Make sure your topic sentence is clear, but does not just announce your topic.
For example, do not write something like: “In this paragraph, I will discuss why it’s bad that poachers are killing giraffes.”
Instead, write something that clearly states your idea with a reasonable opinion and that gives direction to the paragraph: “Giraffes are a key part of the African ecosystem, so it’s important to enforce regulations against the poachers who are killing them for their body parts.”
You’d then follow that up with reasons why giraffes are a key part of the African ecosystem and how poachers are destroying their population.
Step 4: Begin writing your essay.
Once you have your thesis statement and you’ve created an outline with supporting paragraphs and their topic sentences, you can begin writing your essay. It’s important to make that outline before just jumping in–a disorganized essay can spell disaster for you as you continue to write, and could result in a poor grade. Many times, teachers will even require you to turn in your outline as part of your overall essay grade.
Step 5: Proofread and check your resources.
After you’ve written the essay, go back through it with a fine tooth comb. Read through each topic sentence and the paragraphs that follow to ensure that you’ve written clear, solid topic sentences throughout and that the paragraphs with them make sense. During the proofreading phase, you also need to recheck the sources you’re using. Make sure each source is reputable. In other words, do not use sites like Wikipedia where anyone can go in and edit an article to add misinformation. Use sites that:
- Are actual reputable news sources, such as the New York Times , CNN, CBS News
- Have domain names that end in .edu or .gov
- Come from an encyclopedia, such as Encyclopedia Britannica
Using sites that are not reputable could jeopardize the validity of your argument.
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Now that you know the steps to set yourself up for success when writing a topic sentence, there are certain elements that go into a quality first sentence. Always make sure that your topic sentence is the first sentence of a paragraph. You don’t want to make your reader hunt for the point you’re trying to make. Check out some key elements of a good topic sentence:
Make sure your topic sentence isn’t too vague.
You need a topic sentence that has some specifics to it. It also needs to hook in your reader in some way with an opinion. A vague sentence makes it harder to write a paragraph that can clearly backs up your thoughts. For example:
DON’T: “In Pride and Prejudice, Mr. Bingley seems like a nice guy.”
DO: “When Mr. Bingley is first introduced, he comes across as a kind person because he speaks to everyone and doesn’t immediately pass judgment.”
Choose a reasonable opinion.
Your topic sentence should clearly outline whatever point you’re trying to make in the paragraph, but you want to pick a reasonable opinion that you can easily reinforce with facts and statistics. Here’s an example of what you should and should not do:
DON’T: “It’s obvious that Mr. Bingley was a total loser with no backbone.”
DO: “Mr. Bingley could have shown more confidence in his choices and stood up to Mr. Darcy when he found himself in love with Jane Bennet.”
You can then back that up with facts, saying that he was a wealthy Englishman and thus one of the key players in society at the time, which should have given him more confidence. If he’d been more confident, perhaps he would not have left and devastated Jane.
Use your topic sentence as a transition.
Along with telling the reader the point of your next paragraph, your topic sentence should also serve as a transition from the previous paragraph. Without a transition, the essay can feel like it’s choppy and disjointed. For example:
DON’T: “Mr. Bingley is a good man and here’s why.”
DO: “Although Mr. Bingley did break Jane’s heart by leaving, he ended up redeeming himself by returning to Netherfield Hall.”
Keep your topic sentence short.
A long, drawn-out topic sentence can risk losing your reader. Many times, it’s hard to determine the point of a sentence when it goes on for too long. You want a clear, concise sentence that draws in the reader but also leaves some room for you to expand on it in the following paragraph.
DON’T: “Throughout the novel of Pride and Prejudice, Mr. Bingley was often quite different from Mr. Darcy as he would treat all people in a friendly manner, considering them all his friends and acquaintances, even agreeing to throw a ball after Elizabeth’s sisters rudely demanded he do so and was gracious to Mr. and Mrs. Bennet as well despite their manners.”
DO: “Overall, Mr. Bingley served as a foil to Mr. Darcy throughout the story by treating everyone around him equally with dignity and grace.”
Writing an essay can be overwhelming at times, but so long as you avoid some of these common pitfalls, it can be easier to get it done on time.
Don’t wait until the last minute.
If your teacher assigns you an essay or tells you that you have an essay test coming up, don’t wait until the day before to do anything about it. You have to plan or study and you need to give yourself time to do that. If you know it takes you a while to write something, then start planning it as soon as you get the assignment.
Don’t forget to write an outline.
Along with planning, make sure you have that outline written up and planned out well. It will serve as your guideline for writing the essay. Without it, you’ll face the risk of a disorganized essay that does not clearly illustrate your point.
Ask for help if you need it.
This may be the most important pitfall to avoid. If you get in over your head while writing, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Ask a friend to review the essay or ask your teacher for guidance.
Where to Get Your Essay Edited for Free
Once you’ve finished your essay, you may want additional input. There are tools out there to help, but CollegeVine’s free peer essay review tool can provide you with actionable feedback from students just like you. CollegeVine’s tool has helped many students and may be able to help you, too! Asking for peer feedback can help to refine your essay and it never hurts to have an extra set of eyes read through what you’ve written. Check out the free tool today!
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Think of yourself as a member of a jury, listening to a lawyer who is presenting an opening argument. You'll want to know very soon whether the lawyer believes the accused to be guilty or not guilty, and how the lawyer plans to convince you. Readers of academic essays are like jury members: before they have read too far, they want to know what the essay argues as well as how the writer plans to make the argument. After reading your thesis statement, the reader should think, "This essay is going to try to convince me of something. I'm not convinced yet, but I'm interested to see how I might be."
An effective thesis cannot be answered with a simple "yes" or "no." A thesis is not a topic; nor is it a fact; nor is it an opinion. "Reasons for the fall of communism" is a topic. "Communism collapsed in Eastern Europe" is a fact known by educated people. "The fall of communism is the best thing that ever happened in Europe" is an opinion. (Superlatives like "the best" almost always lead to trouble. It's impossible to weigh every "thing" that ever happened in Europe. And what about the fall of Hitler? Couldn't that be "the best thing"?)
A good thesis has two parts. It should tell what you plan to argue, and it should "telegraph" how you plan to argue—that is, what particular support for your claim is going where in your essay.
Steps in Constructing a Thesis
First, analyze your primary sources. Look for tension, interest, ambiguity, controversy, and/or complication. Does the author contradict himself or herself? Is a point made and later reversed? What are the deeper implications of the author's argument? Figuring out the why to one or more of these questions, or to related questions, will put you on the path to developing a working thesis. (Without the why, you probably have only come up with an observation—that there are, for instance, many different metaphors in such-and-such a poem—which is not a thesis.)
Once you have a working thesis, write it down. There is nothing as frustrating as hitting on a great idea for a thesis, then forgetting it when you lose concentration. And by writing down your thesis you will be forced to think of it clearly, logically, and concisely. You probably will not be able to write out a final-draft version of your thesis the first time you try, but you'll get yourself on the right track by writing down what you have.
Keep your thesis prominent in your introduction. A good, standard place for your thesis statement is at the end of an introductory paragraph, especially in shorter (5-15 page) essays. Readers are used to finding theses there, so they automatically pay more attention when they read the last sentence of your introduction. Although this is not required in all academic essays, it is a good rule of thumb.
Anticipate the counterarguments. Once you have a working thesis, you should think about what might be said against it. This will help you to refine your thesis, and it will also make you think of the arguments that you'll need to refute later on in your essay. (Every argument has a counterargument. If yours doesn't, then it's not an argument—it may be a fact, or an opinion, but it is not an argument.)
This statement is on its way to being a thesis. However, it is too easy to imagine possible counterarguments. For example, a political observer might believe that Dukakis lost because he suffered from a "soft-on-crime" image. If you complicate your thesis by anticipating the counterargument, you'll strengthen your argument, as shown in the sentence below.
Some Caveats and Some Examples
A thesis is never a question. Readers of academic essays expect to have questions discussed, explored, or even answered. A question ("Why did communism collapse in Eastern Europe?") is not an argument, and without an argument, a thesis is dead in the water.
A thesis is never a list. "For political, economic, social and cultural reasons, communism collapsed in Eastern Europe" does a good job of "telegraphing" the reader what to expect in the essay—a section about political reasons, a section about economic reasons, a section about social reasons, and a section about cultural reasons. However, political, economic, social and cultural reasons are pretty much the only possible reasons why communism could collapse. This sentence lacks tension and doesn't advance an argument. Everyone knows that politics, economics, and culture are important.
A thesis should never be vague, combative or confrontational. An ineffective thesis would be, "Communism collapsed in Eastern Europe because communism is evil." This is hard to argue (evil from whose perspective? what does evil mean?) and it is likely to mark you as moralistic and judgmental rather than rational and thorough. It also may spark a defensive reaction from readers sympathetic to communism. If readers strongly disagree with you right off the bat, they may stop reading.
An effective thesis has a definable, arguable claim. "While cultural forces contributed to the collapse of communism in Eastern Europe, the disintegration of economies played the key role in driving its decline" is an effective thesis sentence that "telegraphs," so that the reader expects the essay to have a section about cultural forces and another about the disintegration of economies. This thesis makes a definite, arguable claim: that the disintegration of economies played a more important role than cultural forces in defeating communism in Eastern Europe. The reader would react to this statement by thinking, "Perhaps what the author says is true, but I am not convinced. I want to read further to see how the author argues this claim."
A thesis should be as clear and specific as possible. Avoid overused, general terms and abstractions. For example, "Communism collapsed in Eastern Europe because of the ruling elite's inability to address the economic concerns of the people" is more powerful than "Communism collapsed due to societal discontent."
Copyright 1999, Maxine Rodburg and The Tutors of the Writing Center at Harvard University
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How to Write an Argumentative Essay
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- 30th April 2022
An argumentative essay is a structured, compelling piece of writing where an author clearly defines their stance on a specific topic. This is a very popular style of writing assigned to students at schools, colleges, and universities. Learn the steps to researching, structuring, and writing an effective argumentative essay below.
Requirements of an Argumentative Essay
To effectively achieve its purpose, an argumentative essay must contain:
● A concise thesis statement that introduces readers to the central argument of the essay
● A clear, logical, argument that engages readers
● Ample research and evidence that supports your argument
Approaches to Use in Your Argumentative Essay
1. classical.
● Clearly present the central argument.
● Outline your opinion.
● Provide enough evidence to support your theory.
2. Toulmin
● State your claim.
● Supply the evidence for your stance.
● Explain how these findings support the argument.
● Include and discuss any limitations of your belief.
3. Rogerian
● Explain the opposing stance of your argument.
● Discuss the problems with adopting this viewpoint.
● Offer your position on the matter.
● Provide reasons for why yours is the more beneficial stance.
● Include a potential compromise for the topic at hand.
Tips for Writing a Well-Written Argumentative Essay
● Introduce your topic in a bold, direct, and engaging manner to captivate your readers and encourage them to keep reading.
● Provide sufficient evidence to justify your argument and convince readers to adopt this point of view.
● Consider, include, and fairly present all sides of the topic.
● Structure your argument in a clear, logical manner that helps your readers to understand your thought process.
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● Discuss any counterarguments that might be posed.
● Use persuasive writing that’s appropriate for your target audience and motivates them to agree with you.
Steps to Write an Argumentative Essay
Follow these basic steps to write a powerful and meaningful argumentative essay :
Step 1: Choose a topic that you’re passionate about
If you’ve already been given a topic to write about, pick a stance that resonates deeply with you. This will shine through in your writing, make the research process easier, and positively influence the outcome of your argument.
Step 2: Conduct ample research to prove the validity of your argument
To write an emotive argumentative essay , finding enough research to support your theory is a must. You’ll need solid evidence to convince readers to agree with your take on the matter. You’ll also need to logically organize the research so that it naturally convinces readers of your viewpoint and leaves no room for questioning.
Step 3: Follow a simple, easy-to-follow structure and compile your essay
A good structure to ensure a well-written and effective argumentative essay includes:
Introduction
● Introduce your topic.
● Offer background information on the claim.
● Discuss the evidence you’ll present to support your argument.
● State your thesis statement, a one-to-two sentence summary of your claim.
● This is the section where you’ll develop and expand on your argument.
● It should be split into three or four coherent paragraphs, with each one presenting its own idea.
● Start each paragraph with a topic sentence that indicates why readers should adopt your belief or stance.
● Include your research, statistics, citations, and other supporting evidence.
● Discuss opposing viewpoints and why they’re invalid.
● This part typically consists of one paragraph.
● Summarize your research and the findings that were presented.
● Emphasize your initial thesis statement.
● Persuade readers to agree with your stance.
We certainly hope that you feel inspired to use these tips when writing your next argumentative essay . And, if you’re currently elbow-deep in writing one, consider submitting a free sample to us once it’s completed. Our expert team of editors can help ensure that it’s concise, error-free, and effective!
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How To Write A Paper In College When The Prompt Is Vague
Professors often give vague writing prompts when a big end of the year paper is due. This is usually so that you won't feel pigeonholed to a topic and so that you have some creative freedom in writing process. For students, though, this doesn't always translate to a fun time. In fact, the endless possibilities sometimes end up hurting students more than it ends up helping them. This doesn't have to be your reality though. You can create great papers, even when your professor's prompts are less than helpful. Today's blog post is going to show you how to turn a vague prompt into a crazy amazing paper.
![how to write an essay on a vague topic How To Write A Paper In College When The Prompt Is Vague | One of the hardest things to do in college is write a paper with a vague prompt. Today on The Happy Arkansan I am walking you through all the steps you need to take to write an amazing paper even when you don't fully understand the prompt given.](https://thehappyarkansan.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/03/How-To-Write-A-Paper-In-College-When-The-Prompt-Is-Vague.png)
1. Read The Entire Prompt
Okay, so I know this seems like a bit of a no-brainer, but you'd be surprised how many people just don't read the prompt. Take a few minutes to sit down and completely grasp the prompt you are tackling.
- Highlight or underline what the professor is looking for. Professors don't always give rubrics, but if you sit down and look at the paper prompt you can usually come up with your own rubric.
- Take note of the due dates. You need to be aware of the due dates associated with your paper. Especially if this is a semester-long project, there may be many due dates along the way.
- Be sure to list questions you have as you read. If you do have questions. make a list of them after you have given the prompt a once over. Then you can go back and look specifically to see if you just missed the answer to the question, or if you actually need to go ask for an answer to the question.
I hope those first few points were helpful as you take the first step towards owning your next paper.
2. Do A Timed Brainstorming Session
This is not something that I suggest as often as I should, but I adore timed brainstorming sessions. Sometimes when I am getting low on blog post topics or I am not sure what I would like to write about as far as school work goes, I do a timed brainstorm session.
So, how does this work? You basically take out a sheet of paper/notebook, pick a general topic or concept, set a timer for 5-10 minutes, and just write for the length of that time. You don't think about all the other stuff happening. You don't erase if you repeat an idea. You just dump all of your ideas out on a sheet of paper, even if those ideas are chicken scratch and meaningless. Then you go back and look at your brainstorming session to see exactly what you can salvage.
There is a chance you won't get anything from this session, but there is also a chance that you will have your next paper topic in that batch. I love this when I need a burst of creativity and I just need to start thinking about how to tackle a topic or a paper.
I highly suggest getting a cute notebook to keep all your time brainstorming sessions in. I encourage you to do this because it will allow you to look back at your past brainstorming sessions when you inevitably get another vague paper prompt. Why do all your work over again, if you have already done a timed brainstorming session that relates to your current class.
Always keep your phone or a notebook handy
If timed brainstorm sessions aren't your thing, remember to always keep your phone or a notebook within reach. I get ideas for papers/blog posts/and everything in between pretty consistently. You never know when something as small as a dream can help you decide what you would like to write about for a paper. I always have a notebook near my bed for this exact purpose.
3. Research Your Heart Out
Research is a great way to get ideas for what you want to do as a project. Sometimes just spending a few hours looking through research databases can really help you when you are stuck on what to write about. I have written a lengthy blog post all about how to use research databases that I adore, if you don't know the basics of how to use a research database I really encourage reading that article because I give my best advice for doing research (and I even include a video tutorial where I show you exactly how I do research.)
While you are researching your topic you want to be able to quickly skim the articles and books you have found. I have written two lengthy posts on skimming articles and skimming academic books so that you can get right to the point and understand what you need to look at when you are reading. You shouldn't need to read the entire article or book to grasp the concepts inside it.
4. If You Are Stuck, Go To Office Hours
I know that your professor probably asks during class if you have any questions, but don't ask your questions during class . Well, if you have a complex question that is. Complex questions, in my humble opinion, are better left for office hours. So, if you want to ask your professor about the due date, definitely ask that question in class. If you have a really complex question that involves an answer that is longer than a paragraph, go to their office.
- This helps you. Asking questions in class can be really hard. Your professor may have to answer the question so quickly that they can't go as in-depth as they'd like. This may end up leaving out a lot of the answer and leaving you feeling more confused than helped.
- This helps your classmates. Trust me, your classmates are listening to the professors rambles just like you. If you are getting confused, chances are your classmates are too. Plus, if they feel like they have a handle on things already they may get annoyed that class time is being spent helping one student on their research paper.
On the other hand, if your professor sets aside time in class like an entire class period to answering your questions, of course, ask away. If you get confused from that session, you may still like to go to office hours for clarification though.
Chances are, if you are truly stuck, five minutes of class time where you cannot be one-on-one with the professor is not going to help unstick you. Bite the bullet and head to the professor's office hours for individualized attention.
If you have ANY preliminary information, come to the office hours session with that information on hand. Share with them some of your thoughts on the topics you are considering, share any preliminary research you have done, and come prepared with specific questions about what you find confusing about the prompt. The more specific you are, the easier it will be for your professor to help you with your paper.
Pro Tip: Never go to your professor's office hours saying you need help with EVERYTHING. This won't get you far. Come with a specific list of questions that you and your professor can go through.
5. Get An Outline Done And Ask For More Feedback
Once you have reached out to your professor the first time, you need some time to focus and re-group. Before you meet your professor the first time, you need to make adjustments and progress. Write a preliminary outline or write an introductory paragraph that touches on all the parts you want to hit in the paper. This will give your professor something to help you with that's not just abstract talking points. Give your professor something solid to help you with.
I have written an awesome article all about how to write an amazing introductory paragraph so use that as a guideline to help you write a paragraph to bring to your professor.
The reason I think you should bring an outline or an introductory paragraph to your professor is because it is a small token, gives them something to work with, and doesn't waste too much of your time in case they don't see the value in your paper idea.
6. Remember: Professors Want Originality
Even though broad prompts are extremely frustrating to students one of the reason that professors give such broad prompts is because professors want originality. Grading papers is an extremely tedious task, and sometimes getting the same paper over and over makes the process more annoying. Having your topic handed to you can be easy for the student, but it can also be painful because you are forced to research topics that you don't care about. Prompts that are too vague and too specific have their own faults.
Your professor knows that you are still learning how to write a paper correctly. When the prompt is vague it also usually accompanies project approval. If it doesn't, meet with your professor to make sure that your paper has a solid base to work with. Your professor wants just enough stress on this project to make it a worthwhile endeavor, but not so much that it causes you to have major issues. Reach out when you need to so you don't become an originality guinea pig.
7. Go Forth And Conquer Your Best Paper Yet
I know that you are capable of amazing things and that you will crush the paper that you have coming up. Right now, a paper with a vague prompt seems like the worst thing that could ever happen, but I promise with a little hard work, dedication, and visits with your professor you can craft a paper that meets and exceeds the expectations of the pickiest professor.
You have all these tools and tips at your fingertips lovely. Don't waste them.
Related Reading:
10 Mistakes College Students Make When It Comes To Writing Papers, Part One
10 Mistakes College Students Make When It Comes To Writing Papers, Part Two
Final Thoughts
I hope that you enjoyed this blog post. It is possible to create great papers even when your professor gives you a vague or broad prompt. I would love to know how you personally deal with an assignment with the prompt is too vague, Leave your thoughts in the comments below so we can continue this conversation.
Writing a paper is hard, especially when the prompt is vague. Check out tips from @happyarkansan to make it easier.
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Amanda Cross
Amanda is the original voice behind The Happy Arkansan. She is a happiness enthusiast with a passion for helping others, marketing, and red/purple lipstick.
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The Comments
Strength and Sunshine
Sometimes too much freedom with the prompts can be so stressful! Ha! I have a 10 paper paper to write for one of my finals, but once I nail the topic, it all usually flows to my liking 😉
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Writing Studio
Refining thesis statements, what makes for an effective thesis.
In an effort to make our handouts more accessible, we have begun converting our PDF handouts to web pages. Download this page as a PDF: Refining Thesis Statements Return to Writing Studio Handouts
An effective thesis should be argumentative and controversial (i.e., if you could make a plausible case against your thesis, it is probably an argument), something not immediately obvious which you can persuade a reader to believe through the evidence in the body of your paper.
A strong thesis statement answers a specific question and takes a distinct position on the topic, is focused, and allows the reader to anticipate the organization of the argument to follow.
A weak thesis statement is vague (identifies a topic but does not specify an argument), offers plot summary or is a statement of fact, is un-provable, or does not give the reader a sense of why the argument is important.
Look over the two example thesis statements below. Consider and name how each of the progressively refined versions matches the criteria offered above.
Example Thesis A
Version 1: Marge Simpson is important to the plot of The Simpsons.
Version 2: Marge Simpson is important to The Simpsons because she fulfills a significant family role as a mother and housewife.
Version 3: Marge Simpson is important to The Simpsons because she fulfills a significant family role as a teacher and caregiver to her husband and children.
Version 4: While Marge Simpson may be a model caregiver for her family, she is a different sort of model for her audience.
Version 5: Despite her role as a seemingly submissive housewife and mother, Marge Simpson comes to function for the audience of The Simpsons as a subversive force against “middle class” values.
Example Thesis B
Version 1: Eating disorders are a significant problem among college-aged students.
Version 2: Eating disorders are a significant problem among college-aged men because they negatively affect academic performance, socializing, and overall psychological well-being.
Version 3: Eating disorders among college-aged men are overshadowed by a focus on eating disorders among college-aged women.
Version 4: Eating disorders among college-aged men are overshadowed by a focus on eating disorders among college-aged women; people don’t notice this because an eating disorder is typically considered a women’s disease and is stigmatized as such.
Version 5: Lack of attention to eating disorders among college-aged men not only leaves this group of students untreated, but also exacerbates feelings of isolation associated with this disease.
This handout was originally produced by Jane Wanninger, Graduate Student, Department of English, Vanderbilt University
Last revised: 07/2009 | Adapted for web delivery: 04/2021
In order to access certain content on this page, you may need to download Adobe Acrobat Reader or an equivalent PDF viewer software.
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What is Vague Writing?
Vague writing stems from writers that have the inability to express exactly what they want to say. Instead of directly and clearly describing key points, such an author would use generalizations, avoid specifics and concrete naming, and prefers to make broad judgments instead of providing detailed facts and evidence.
e.g. (Vague) My friend is a highly erudite and educated person. (Strong) My friend has a PhD in nuclear physics from Howard University.
Why Should It Be Avoided?
Vagueness in writing negatively affects the comprehensibility of the text you are working on, because your audience will hardly understand what you intended to say. In addition, vagueness is a sign of being unprofessional; it also may be annoying to readers―especially for those who value precision and specifics.
How to Avoid Vague Writing
– Use descriptions if you need to convey your impression of an object, scene, or person. Instead of saying, “My new boss has a weird appearance,” for instance, you could write: “My new boss has purple hair and dark-red lipstick, and instead of a business suit, she wore jeans and a singlet.”
– When it is possible, use concrete names instead of talking about an object or person indirectly. Compare the following sentences: “When I was in the room, a guy whom I didn’t really know entered and started to distract me.” You might want to add more specifics to it, for example: “When I was reading The Return of the King in my room, Josh―a guy who lived next door and whom I didn’t know quite well―came in looking for my roommate, and distracted me.”
– If you are talking about qualities, specify them instead of simply mentioning that they exist.
e.g. (Vague) Hemingway was a great writer who wrote interesting books. (Strong) Hemingway was an American writer whose vivid language and rich life experience portrayed through his works helped me write my own novels.
– Keep the golden rule in mind: “If you can cut it―cut it.” Reread your writing several times, and if you have doubts whether to cut a word or phrase, or not―cut it.
– Use active verbs.
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DEAN’S BOOK w/ Prof. CONNIE GRIFFIN
Honors291g-cdg’s blog.
How to Write a Paper Topic Proposal & Thesis Statement
• PART 1 OF THE ASSIGNMENT: PAPER TOPIC PROPOSAL The formal research paper or honors thesis will provide you with an opportunity to more fully develop the background and implications of one of the topics presented during the semester or explore a related topic not covered. Your paper topic proposal requires research in order to make your proposal as close to your paper topic as possible. I strongly suggest you come to office hours to discuss your topic proposal with me, because I will review all proposals for viability and reject any inappropriate or undoable topics. The written proposal must include the following 2 things: 1. Your proposed paper topic: This part of the proposal is one sentence. Keep your paper topic narrow (but not so narrow that there are no scholarly sources available on the topic). 2. Why the topic is interesting and important: Address how you will focus the topic. If you choose a topic that is not of interest to you, it will show in your paper. This topic must remain of interest to you for two semesters, so give it some serious consideration. As we cover topics in class, undoubtedly something will come up that you want to learn more about. This would be an ideal paper topic. This part of the assignment requires that you include two to three paragraphs about why this topic is interesting and important. Why should the reader care about Roger Williams’s relationship with the Narragansett Indians? If you simply retell the story of his exile from Massachusetts and what he thought of the Narragansett religious beliefs and practices, that’s a book report, not an honors level research paper. However, if you explore the significance Narragansett religion had on Williams, his writings, and his life, you have the makings of an interesting and important research paper. It would require research pertaining to the role of missionaries in the American colonies, research of the Puritan philosophy and why Williams was banned from Massachusetts Bay Colony, and research of Narragansett beliefs and religious views and how they were impacted by the English and Dutch.
What should your paper topic be? Select a course-related topic. I suggest you write about an area that most interests you and in which you might already have some background knowledge. What do you want to learn more about? What are you interested in? Avoid choosing a topic that bores you. Sustained interest in your topic is important, as a topic that bores you makes for a boring paper. It is unlikely you will be able to fool the reader into believing you liked a topic that you didn’t actually like.
Now, narrow down your topic: Once you’ve chosen a topic, ask yourself if it’s narrow enough for you to tackle in the paper or honors thesis you will be writing. Narrow topics generally result in the best papers. One important consideration is the availability of material. Therefore, before making a final decision on your topic, do some initial research to find out the type, quality, and quantity of information available. Finally, how much time do you have to write your paper? The earlier you begin your paper, the more thorough the treatment your topic will receive. If you can’t begin your paper early in the semester, consider limiting your topic so you can deal with it adequately.
• PART 2 OF THE ASSIGNMENT: THESIS STATEMENT What is a thesis statement? A thesis statement is “a proposition stated as a conclusion which you will then demonstrate or ‘prove’ in your paper.” It is the focal point around which your research will revolve. It is usually stated in the form of an assertion or statement you resolve through your research. It’s not a question; it’s an answer, such as: “Key decisions in large U.S. cities are made by a handful of individuals, drawn largely from business, industrial, and municipal circles, who occupy the top of the power hierarchy.” “Cigarette smoking harms the body by constricting the blood vessels, accelerating the heartbeat, paralyzing the cilia in the bronchial tubes, and activating excessive gastric secretions in the stomach.” A thesis takes a position on an issue. Because you must take a position or develop a claim about a subject, you need to convey that position or claim in a thesis statement in your research paper. It is different from a topic sentence in that a thesis statement is not neutral. It announces, in addition to the topic, the argument you want to make or the point you want to prove. This is your own opinion that you intend to back up. This is your reason and motivation for writing. A thesis statement: i) tells the reader how you will interpret the significance of the subject matter under discussion. ii) is a road map for the paper; in other words, it tells the reader what to expect from the rest of the paper. iii) directly answers the question asked of you. A thesis is an interpretation of a question or subject, not the subject itself. The subject, or topic, of an essay might be World War II or Moby Dick; a thesis must then offer a way to understand the war or the novel. iv) makes a claim that others might dispute. v) is usually a single sentence somewhere in your first paragraph that presents your argument to the reader. The rest of the paper, the body of the essay, gathers and organizes evidence that will persuade the reader of the logic of your interpretation. After you have done some preliminary research and reading on your narrowed-down topic, you should formulate a single-sentence thesis statement.
Writing in college often takes the form of persuasion – convincing others that you have an interesting, logical point of view on the subject you are studying. Persuasion is a skill you practice regularly in your daily life. You persuade your roommate to clean up, your parents to let you borrow the car, your friend to vote for your favorite candidate or policy. In college, course assignments often ask you to make a persuasive case in writing. You are asked to convince your reader of your point of view. This form of persuasion, often called academic argument, follows a predictable pattern in writing. After a brief introduction of your topic, you state your point of view on the topic directly and often in one sentence. This sentence is the thesis statement, and it serves as a summary of the argument you’ll make in the rest of your paper.
What is the purpose of the thesis statement? The thesis statement guides you, enabling you to focus your research paper and outline what you will write. It allows you to clarify your thinking and determine what is relevant and irrelevant as you do your research. Your research paper must be thesis-driven. A high school level “report” will not receive a passing grade. The thesis must pull together the analysis that follows. Your thesis statement must be specific – it should cover only what you will discuss in your research paper and must be supported with specific evidence. The thesis statement usually appears at the end of the first paragraph of a paper. Early in your paper I should be able to locate the thesis statement. If I ask you “Where is the thesis statement?” you should be able to point to it immediately.
How do you come up with a thesis statement? A thesis is the result of a lengthy thinking process and careful deliberation after preliminary research. Formulating a thesis is not the first thing you do after reading a writing assignment. Before you develop an argument on any topic, you have to collect and organize evidence, look for possible relationships between known facts (such as surprising contrasts or similarities), and think about the significance of these relationships. Once you do this thinking, you will probably have a “working thesis,” a basic main idea, an argument that you think you can support with evidence but that may need adjustment along the way. Your topic may change somewhat as you write, so you may need to revise your thesis statement to reflect exactly what you have discussed in the paper.
Thesis Statement Samples: 1) The non-thesis thesis: You must take a stand or you’ll end up with a “non-thesis thesis.” a) Bad Thesis 1: In his article, Stanley Fish shows that we don’t really have the right to free speech. b) Bad Thesis 2: This paper will consider the advantages and disadvantages of certain restrictions on free speech. c) Better Thesis 1: Stanley Fish’s argument that free speech exists more as a political prize than as a legal reality ignores the fact that even as a political prize it still serves the social end of creating a general cultural atmosphere of tolerance that may ultimately promote free speech in our nation just as effectively as any binding law. d) Better Thesis 2: Even though there may be considerable advantages to restricting hate speech, the possibility of chilling open dialogue on crucial racial issues is too great and too high a price to pay. 2) The overly broad thesis: A thesis should be as specific as possible, and it should be tailored to reflect the scope of the paper. It is not possible, for instance, to write about the history of English literature in a five-page paper. In addition to choosing simply a smaller topic, strategies to narrow a thesis include specifying a method or perspective or delineating certain limits. a) Bad Thesis 1: There should be no restrictions on the First Amendment. b) Bad Thesis 2: The government has the right to limit free speech. c) Better Thesis 1: There should be no restrictions on the First Amendment if those restrictions are intended merely to protect individuals from unspecified or otherwise unquantifiable or unverifiable “emotional distress.” d) Better Thesis 2: The government has the right to limit free speech in cases of overtly racist or sexist language because our failure to address such abuses would effectively suggest that our society condones such ignorant and hateful views. 3) The incontestable thesis: A thesis must be arguable. And in order for it to be arguable, it must present a view that someone might reasonably contest. Sometimes a thesis ultimately says, “people should be good,” or “bad things are bad.” Such thesis statements are redundant or so universally accepted that there is no need to prove the point. a) Bad Thesis 1: Although we have the right to say what we want, we should avoid hurting other people’s feelings. b) Bad Thesis 2: There are always alternatives to using racist speech. c) Better Thesis 1: If we can accept that emotional injuries can be just as painful as physical ones we should limit speech that may hurt people’s feelings in ways similar to the way we limit speech that may lead directly to bodily harm. d) Better Thesis 2: The “fighting words” exception to free speech is not legitimate because it wrongly considers speech as an action. 4) The “list essay” thesis: A good argumentative thesis provides not only a position on an issue but also suggests the structure of the paper. The thesis should allow the reader to imagine and anticipate the flow of the paper, in which a sequence of points logically proves the essay’s main assertion. A list essay provides no such structure, so that different points and paragraphs appear arbitrary with no logical connection to one another. a) Bad Thesis 1: There are many reasons we need to limit hate speech. b) Bad Thesis 2: Some of the arguments in favor of regulating pornography are persuasive. c) Better Thesis 1: Among the many reasons we need to limit hate speech the most compelling ones all refer to our history of discrimination and prejudice, and it is, ultimately, for the purpose of trying to repair our troubled racial society that we need hate speech legislation. d) Better Thesis 2: Some of the arguments in favor of regulating pornography are persuasive because they ask pornography proponents to ask themselves whether such a profession would be on a list of professions they would desire for their daughters or mothers. 5) The research paper thesis: In another course this would be acceptable, and, in fact, possibly even desirable. But in this kind of course, a thesis statement that makes a factual claim that can be verified only with scientific, sociological, psychological, or other kind of experimental evidence is not appropriate. You need to construct a thesis that you are prepared to prove using the tools you have available, without having to consult the world’s leading expert on the issue to provide you with a definitive judgment. a) Bad Thesis 1: Americans today are not prepared to give up on the concept of free speech. b) Bad Thesis 2: Hate speech can cause emotional pain and suffering in victims just as intense as physical battery. c) Better Thesis 1: Whether or not the cultural concept of free speech bears any relation to the reality of 1st amendment legislation and jurisprudence, its continuing social function as a promoter of tolerance and intellectual exchange trumps the call for politicization (according to Fish’s agenda) of the term. d) Better Thesis 2: The various arguments against the regulation of hate speech depend on the unspoken and unexamined assumption that emotional pain is trivial.
How do I know if my thesis is strong? If there’s time, run it by a professor or make an appointment at the Writing Center to get some feedback (http://www.umass.edu/writingcenter/index.html). Even if you do not have time to get advice elsewhere, you can do some thesis evaluation of your own. When reviewing your first draft of your working thesis, ask yourself the following: 1) Do I answer the question? Re-reading the question prompt after constructing a working thesis can help you fix an argument that misses the focus of the question. 2) Have I taken a position that others might challenge or oppose? If your thesis simply states facts that no one would, or even could, disagree with, it’s possible that you are simply providing a summary, rather than making an argument. 3) Is my thesis statement specific enough? Thesis statements that are too vague often do not have a strong argument. If your thesis contains words like “good” or “successful,” see if you could be more specific: why is something “good”; what specifically makes something “successful”? 4) Does my thesis pass the “So what?” test? If a reader’s first response is, “So what?” then you need to clarify, to forge a relationship, or to connect to a larger issue. 5) Does my essay support my thesis specifically and without wandering? If your thesis and the body of your essay do not seem to go together, one of them has to change. It’s okay to change your working thesis to reflect things you have figured out in the course of writing your paper. Remember, always reassess and revise your writing as necessary. 6) Does my thesis pass the “how and why?” test? If a reader’s first response is “how?” or “why?” your thesis may be too open-ended and lack guidance for the reader. See what you can add to give the reader a better take on your position right from the beginning.
Jane M. Smith Honors ____ [Date] Paper Topic Proposal and Thesis Statement Proposed paper topic: [One sentence.] Why the topic is interesting and important: [Two to three paragraphs.] See details above on what is required of this section. Thesis statement: [One sentence.]
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Most Common Writing Mistakes: Why Vague Writing Is Weak Writing
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As the creator of your worlds and your characters, you will always have the ability to make statements of authority in your writing. After all, if you’re not the authority in your stories, who is? What this means is that you never need to wallow in the quagmire of vague details and fuzzy ideas.
What Vague Writing Looks Like
Take a look at the following examples of vague writing:
- Maddock looked at the wall, which seemed to be smeared with spaghetti sauce.
- The bomb fell approximately ten or twelve feet away from me.
- Elle was about forty-five minutes late for her dentist appointment when a cop pulled her over, apparently for speeding.
- Mark’s figures revealed that the addition to the house would take up roughly fifty square feet.
Did you spot the ambiguities in these sentences? Every one of these examples contains words that unnecessarily weaken the author’s intensity and certainty.
How to Fix Vague Writing
Let’s take another look, this time with the vague words removed:
Maddock looked at the wall, which was smeared with spaghetti sauce.
Unless you’re using “spaghetti sauce” to conceal the substance’s true identity (perhaps it’s blood, and you’ve a reason for delaying Maddock’s realization of this fact), don’t tell readers what something “seemed” like. Just tell them what it is .
The bomb fell ten feet away from me.
Does the narrating character know the bomb is exactly ten feet away from her? Probably not. But, because readers will understand the narrator is making an educated guess, and because readers don’t care whether the bomb is ten feet away or twelve feet away, save yourself the extra words and the unnecessary dithering.
Elle was forty-five minutes late for her dentist appointment when a cop pulled her over for speeding.
Again, it’s probably not important whether Elle was forty-four, forty-five, or forty-six minutes late. Neither is it important to inform readers that the narrator isn’t certain the number was exactly forty-five.
Similarly, unless there’s a good reason for the narrator’s having to guess why the cop pulled her over, go ahead and delete the “apparently.” Most of the time, readers don’t care about what appeared to happen, only what did happen.
Mark’s figures revealed that the addition to the house would take up fifty square feet.
Would the word “roughly” really add anything to this sentence? If the exact figure is more or less than fifty feet, and that exact figure is important to the story, go ahead and state the exact figure. If not, just round up or down to a precise number.
10 Words That Signal Vague Writing
Occasionally, your story will demand vague phrasing for plot reasons. But when ambiguities aren’t necessary, you can save your readers from boredom and possible confusion by avoiding the following words:
- Approximately
- More or less
- Give or take
If you are bold, precise, and definite in your choice of words, your readers will feel the power of your prose.
>>Click here to read more posts in the Most Common Writing Mistakes Series.
Wordplayers, tell me your opinions! What words and phrases do you feel contribute to unnecessarily vague writing? Tell me in the comments!
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K.M. Weiland is the award-winning and internationally-published author of the acclaimed writing guides Outlining Your Novel , Structuring Your Novel , and Creating Character Arcs . A native of western Nebraska, she writes historical and fantasy novels and mentors authors on her award-winning website Helping Writers Become Authors.
Often, my first draft contains many of the vague words or phrases that you’ve cited. They are easy to spot and remove during editing. I agree that they do weaken writing. So the question is: Why do I use them in the first place? I haven’t come up with an answer to that question yet, so editing before posting is a must.
I’ve just subscribed to your podcasts on iTunes. I have enjoyed listening to them when I visit your site, but I think that I will get to listen to them more often now that they are delivered to my iPod.
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It seems like you appear to have a problem with some words being used in fiction writing. It looks more or less as if you are almost going to get annoyed, give or take, with anybody who uses some of these words. Am I approximately on the right track and thus have I roughly anticipated your attitude towards these words; or do you think I’m wrong or only nearly wrong? Excellent blog. I had some fun with these words 🙂 I use ‘seem’ far too often so I use the search command to find them when I have written – a useful editing tool. Spell check is useful also then I might learn to spell attitude better. 🙂
@Ray: Glad you’re enjoying the podcasts! You’re right – the good thing about vague words and phrasings is that removing them is usually just a simple matter of running a Find in Word.
@Christopher: You seem to be roughly on the right track – give or take a phrase or two. 😉
One reason (excuse?) for using vague words is to stay in the POV.
Would the POV character be confident the bomb fell exactly ten feet away? Probably not. But would he care?
The solution is to think more like the character.
Most people don’t measure in feet. What about car-length; compact-car-length; moving-van-length; knocked me off my feet; four steps; two bodies; dog-leash; or covered me in dust / splinters / bricks?
Even if he does think in feet (real estate agents, long-jump athlete), would he care about the measurement error? Sometimes. In the moment, probably not, unless he’s programming a bomb-disposal robot. In a legal charge, probably yes, so the defense won’t quibble over the measurement error.
Oh boy, the “should, would, could” factor! My first drafts are infested with this kind of language. By the second draft they are gone, never to be seen again.
Most of the time… 😀
@Cricket: Staying in POV is always key. If being vague shows something important about a character’s personality, definitely leave it in.
@ralfast: Good for you! Thank heavens for second drafts, eh?
Seem and almost are mine. At a class I attended, the tutor pointed out how things couldn’t be “Almost” anything. Your character either did or didn’t do something. Writing “she almost got there in time” could be simplified into “she was late”. Definitely one of the best pieces of writing advice I’ve ever had!
Wow!! Thanks for all the advice!!! I will just keep a note of this all!!
Thanks for listing the words instead of just telling all the advice!!
with warm regards http://becomingprince.blogspot.com
I think the word ‘very’ is vague. I read a quote from Mark Twain: “Write ‘Damn’ every time you are tempted to write ‘Very.’ Your editor will scratch it out, and you’ll be left with the sentence you ought to have written.” Since then, I scratch ‘Very’ out every time I write it, and every time, it strengthens the sentence more than weakens it. Thank you Mark Twain. And Thank you for the post!
Uh-oh, I use “seem” or “seemed” too much! thanks for such a helpful post.
I’m wondering if these words turn up a lot because they’re common in business writing. I edit a newsletter, and people just don’t want to commit, so they add the weasel words.
@Miss Cole: It’s kind of akin to Yoda’s immortal wisdom: “Do or do not. There is no try.”
@AllMyPosts: Specific lists are always more helpful in my opinion. Glad you found it useful!
@T.R.: Yes, very vague. 😉 Mark Twain’s advice rarely goes amiss.
@Elizabeth: The good news is that now that you’ve figured it out, it’s an easy issue to fix.
@Linda: Interesting observation. Makes sense to me!
Oh man, I didn’t even realize I use the “looks as if” on just about every page! *off to delete*
Thanks for this!!
Amazing how these insidious little phrases sneak in without us even being aware of them, isn’t it?
Oh I am SO guilty of this!! Ahh. Great post, and grat advice, as usual ;o) Thank you for this. Off to scan the WIP again!! LOL
We certainly give our Find tools a good workout, don’t we? Gotta wonder what writers did before them!
I just searched my last completed rough draft for these words. *wince* In 105 pages I have 240 abouts. I look forward to avoiding them in my next draft! Thanks for doing this series. It is making me eager to finish my first draft so I can start editing!
Better late than never on fixing ’em!
Thanks for this! I love the comments, too.
I find that I don’t want to “commit” to things, so I add in those vague qualifiers sometimes, too.
Another great article. One of my favorite things about your posts is that you don’t just talk about what we should and shouldn’t do. You always share multiple examples and that makes it easier to grasp whatever lesson you’re sharing. Thanks for another good one.
Great post, as always. I’m going to have to do a search for the word “seem” in my WIP.
@Sarah: As writers, we like to cover our bases. We may be *pretty* sure of a fact, but, just in case, we’re wrong we’ll stick in a qualifier. But the truth is: We either need to do the necessary research to be sure, or we need to just lie so convincingly that readers never even think about doubting us.
@Lee: You’re very welcome! I’m glad you find the examples helpful.
Great article! I find that I’m prone to use vague words when I get tired and don’t want to work at precise wording. Thanks for the list. Now I can go edit my last story and groan.
@Katie: You know, I haven’t done a search like that in a while myself. I should probably run one too!
@Karen: Editing and groaning – two actions that are often very productive when done together!
I’ve had to remove plenty of these words from my manuscript, and I’ll bet I can delete more. Thanks.
Thanks for the great reminders. And now, for fear of becoming vague or weak, I’ll just begin editing.
Get that red pen out and start wielding! 😀
@Julie: Have fun! The last thing a writer can afford is to appear weak or vague – unless, of course, he’s dealing with an intentionally weak or vague character.
I’m always looking for ways to tighten my story. Thanks for the word list.
Tight stories are usually excellent stories. Here’s to all of us achieving that goal!
I’ve had to go through and consciously remove a bunch of imprecise words for the very reasons you’ve specified out of my stories. “About” is one of my biggies, but so is “just” combined with “about”! 🙂 You have to be precise when writing mysteries, although a little obfuscation by imprecision can make good red herrings. 😉
“Just” was a word that an early editor jumped on me for overusing. I like to think I’m slightly more aware of it now days!
So true, so true! I use “seems” a lot, but I usually notice it. Still, I need to be better about getting it out of my prose.
Most vague words do a good job blending into the wallpaper. We don’t notice them, readers don’t notice them. What we *do* notice is the effect they have on our prose.
It’s taken a while to see it but once I matured as a writer I see writing like those and I feel it more than I read it. When I’m reviewing something I come across them and I feel it before I identify the ambiguous statements. It’s a fondness for adverbs.
Adverbs (and adjectives) are like candy. We love them, but they’re not necessarily good for us.
You’ve listed key indicators of diluted writing. I can’t think of another word to add to this very useful list of culprits, but will save it as a reference to perform global searches on my own manuscripts. I’ve always been weary of “seems” and “about” and any word with an -ly ending. Why make broth when you can have stew, something the reader can get their teeth into?
That’s a great analogy! Personally, I’ve never been into broth. But stew… mmm!
OK, next lesson checked, I am guilty of these words, too. At least a bit better than my “there” sins. Thanks – now I got much closer to understand why this ProWritingAid is highlighting the vague and abstract words. I use it for editing but never paid much attention to this report. Yes, more groaning will happen soon… I’m not sure if this fits your list, but my PWA discovered an excessive usage of “all”, the worst *seems* to be in “at all” clump.
Wow! How timely was this, my friend…I’m self-editing my first novel, and I’ve noticed these words over and over. And I’ve taken them out in order to tighten the sentences and make my characters less wishy-washy. One word I use and overuse is “sometimes”. I’ve found in several instances that taking it out defines my character: “He’d noticed over the years she sometimes reacted that way.” In the context of the scene, it’s much better to say, “He’d noticed over the years she’d reacted the same way.” Thanks, Katie! Back to spit-polishing now…
Good addition! I like the “poetry” that sometimes adds in certain situations. But often, as you say, it’s nothing but equivocating.
Nice “vague writing” examples, Katie. I agree with your assessment, and add one more. In the final example where the house addition is 50 square feet, this corresponds to a room that is just over 7 feet square – a hilariously tiny addition. Unless describing the surprisingly minuscule size of the addition was the intent of including the numbers, I submit that this author’s bigger mistake was mathematical!
That, my friend, is a good demonstration of my math skills. 😉
I generally agree, but I am also sometimes jerked out of my reading bubble when characters note something of which they can’t be sure – in sentences such as: “He looked up and saw a 23-year-old woman approach him”. In such cases, please add the vagueness, or risk bursting the bubble!
In that case, I agree. It’s a matter of POV. Would the POV character think of this woman as exactly twenty-three? We might think of someone as “twenty,” but probably not “twenty-three.” If so, it’s saying something about the narrator.
This is a great article. What do you think about using the word seemed in the cases where the narrating character, say in third person limited, is noticing the reaction of another character? Example: “He seemed unsure about the plan but eventually agreed to it.” I’ve always thought it was a great way to show the motivations of a non-narrating character without head hopping.
I like to avoid it when possible, but sometimes it’s crucial for staying in POV. You might find this post helpful: Inferring Non-POV Characters’ Thoughts .
There are times, to me, that every story needs to be a little vague. One, to create a question in the reader’s minds. I like to give the reader 2 + 2 + 1…not 5. Make them wonder a little bit. I think it sucks them further into the story. I like small innuendos and finger posts…that must be answered, of course, at some point. I think a touch of vagueness on occasion creates mystery. Really, how many people could say with certainty that the bomb fell ten feet from me? Now I do agree that ten or twelve is a bit broad. How about a little over ten feet away… Is there really a better way to say this? — “You don’t seem to count very well…woman. They’s three of us an’ one of you.” “Just about even odds…I make it.” She grinned at the hawk-faced gunman. Or– After circling back about mile and a half, Bone approached the road from the north through the cedar trees and other brush while Loraine came in from the south. They caught sight of each other and signaled. There’s no way anyone could know if it was a mile…or a mile and a half out in the countryside. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. Everything has its place…Even an occasional ‘very’.
I don’t disagree. But it’s important for writers to recognize the vague words, so we can make a conscious choice about why we may or may not be using them.
“As the creator of your worlds and your characters, you will always have the ability to make statements of authority in your writing. After all, if you’re not the authority in your stories, who is?”
Doesn’t this presume an omniscient narrator though? If we are using first or third person limited POV, we are limited to what the character perceives and the inferences they draw about what is happening. If we tell exactly what is happening and why, we are changing POV. Or, possibly, we’re revealing something about that character. A character who isn’t noticeably aware of their own perceptions and biases may sound confident and bold, but they also may be over-confident. A character who does realise the limits of their perception (and internally questions what they are seeing and how they are interpreting it) is much wiser.
But that said, I do see you point. If we are going for a close narrative distance, we don’t want to be filtering events through the character’s senses too much. We want to reader to experience the events as the character does.
As usual, good writing is one almighty balancing act!
Taken literally, yes, my statement implies an omniscient narrator. But even within confined POVs, the author will still be choosing every word with precision. If the vagueness is a deliberate choice to characterize or remain in POV, the rules will be a little different. But even in confined POVs, there is often much more vagueness than is actually necessary to preserve integrity.
Peter raises an interesting point/question: when should the specificity of the language reflect the author’s knowledge vs the character’s knowledge?
Or to put it another way: How fair are we obligated to play with the audience? If we’re viewing the scene through Maddock’s eyes and he sees something as tomato sauce on the wall, but it’s actually blood, is it fair and reasonable to describe it as sauce, since Maddock would assume that and hasn’t had the opportunity to discover otherwise? Or is that cheating the audience.
On the flip side, if our descriptions only lapse into vagueness when we’re hiding something from the audience, doesn’t that kind of telegraph their significance?
It always depends on the effect the author is trying to create, which is why authors must always be aware of how readers are likely to interact with any particular phrase. If the author is purposely playing against reader expectations for any variety of reasons (irony, experimentation, etc.), breaking the “rules” of POV can work. But the payoff must be a fair exchange; otherwise, readers will just end up feeling the author broke the rules out of ignorance rather than understanding.
Thanks for this post. A reminder about the trap of weasel words is always helpful.
The Elle example looks like it’s part of a larger descriptive/summary section. If it was instead introducing a scene about Elle’s encounter with the cop and you wanted to avoid losing tension by giving the outcome up front, one alternative approach would be to more precisely describe the current setup rather than the future outcome. eg. “Elle was forty-five minutes late for her dentist appointment and was doing 54 in a 50 zone when the police siren sprang into life behind her”.
Agreed. Better dramatization often fixes the problem altogether.
It may help, too, for character and voice sake to use creative descriptors people already understand for numerical measurements. “The bomb went off a car’s length away.” “Elle was already a Law & Order late for her dentist when the cop’s lights flashed.” “Mark’s figures revealed the addition would add a McDonald’s Playland amount of space to the already sprawling project.” Those may not be the best examples, but the concept is an option.
This is especially helpful when writing fantasy, when accepted measurement standards may not work for the story.
Oh good point. I like that. “The clever spy – or so he thought – was a noon shadow from his prize, when out of the trunk sprang a … “
Good advice. Thank you. Can’t think of any words to add to the list. It’s pretty comprehensive. Opps. Should I have just said, it’s comprehensive?
Hah. Good save. 😉
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How to Write an Essay Introduction | 4 Steps & Examples
Published on February 4, 2019 by Shona McCombes . Revised on July 23, 2023.
A good introduction paragraph is an essential part of any academic essay . It sets up your argument and tells the reader what to expect.
The main goals of an introduction are to:
- Catch your reader’s attention.
- Give background on your topic.
- Present your thesis statement —the central point of your essay.
This introduction example is taken from our interactive essay example on the history of Braille.
The invention of Braille was a major turning point in the history of disability. The writing system of raised dots used by visually impaired people was developed by Louis Braille in nineteenth-century France. In a society that did not value disabled people in general, blindness was particularly stigmatized, and lack of access to reading and writing was a significant barrier to social participation. The idea of tactile reading was not entirely new, but existing methods based on sighted systems were difficult to learn and use. As the first writing system designed for blind people’s needs, Braille was a groundbreaking new accessibility tool. It not only provided practical benefits, but also helped change the cultural status of blindness. This essay begins by discussing the situation of blind people in nineteenth-century Europe. It then describes the invention of Braille and the gradual process of its acceptance within blind education. Subsequently, it explores the wide-ranging effects of this invention on blind people’s social and cultural lives.
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Table of contents
Step 1: hook your reader, step 2: give background information, step 3: present your thesis statement, step 4: map your essay’s structure, step 5: check and revise, more examples of essay introductions, other interesting articles, frequently asked questions about the essay introduction.
Your first sentence sets the tone for the whole essay, so spend some time on writing an effective hook.
Avoid long, dense sentences—start with something clear, concise and catchy that will spark your reader’s curiosity.
The hook should lead the reader into your essay, giving a sense of the topic you’re writing about and why it’s interesting. Avoid overly broad claims or plain statements of fact.
Examples: Writing a good hook
Take a look at these examples of weak hooks and learn how to improve them.
- Braille was an extremely important invention.
- The invention of Braille was a major turning point in the history of disability.
The first sentence is a dry fact; the second sentence is more interesting, making a bold claim about exactly why the topic is important.
- The internet is defined as “a global computer network providing a variety of information and communication facilities.”
- The spread of the internet has had a world-changing effect, not least on the world of education.
Avoid using a dictionary definition as your hook, especially if it’s an obvious term that everyone knows. The improved example here is still broad, but it gives us a much clearer sense of what the essay will be about.
- Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein is a famous book from the nineteenth century.
- Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein is often read as a crude cautionary tale about the dangers of scientific advancement.
Instead of just stating a fact that the reader already knows, the improved hook here tells us about the mainstream interpretation of the book, implying that this essay will offer a different interpretation.
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Next, give your reader the context they need to understand your topic and argument. Depending on the subject of your essay, this might include:
- Historical, geographical, or social context
- An outline of the debate you’re addressing
- A summary of relevant theories or research about the topic
- Definitions of key terms
The information here should be broad but clearly focused and relevant to your argument. Don’t give too much detail—you can mention points that you will return to later, but save your evidence and interpretation for the main body of the essay.
How much space you need for background depends on your topic and the scope of your essay. In our Braille example, we take a few sentences to introduce the topic and sketch the social context that the essay will address:
Now it’s time to narrow your focus and show exactly what you want to say about the topic. This is your thesis statement —a sentence or two that sums up your overall argument.
This is the most important part of your introduction. A good thesis isn’t just a statement of fact, but a claim that requires evidence and explanation.
The goal is to clearly convey your own position in a debate or your central point about a topic.
Particularly in longer essays, it’s helpful to end the introduction by signposting what will be covered in each part. Keep it concise and give your reader a clear sense of the direction your argument will take.
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As you research and write, your argument might change focus or direction as you learn more.
For this reason, it’s often a good idea to wait until later in the writing process before you write the introduction paragraph—it can even be the very last thing you write.
When you’ve finished writing the essay body and conclusion , you should return to the introduction and check that it matches the content of the essay.
It’s especially important to make sure your thesis statement accurately represents what you do in the essay. If your argument has gone in a different direction than planned, tweak your thesis statement to match what you actually say.
To polish your writing, you can use something like a paraphrasing tool .
You can use the checklist below to make sure your introduction does everything it’s supposed to.
Checklist: Essay introduction
My first sentence is engaging and relevant.
I have introduced the topic with necessary background information.
I have defined any important terms.
My thesis statement clearly presents my main point or argument.
Everything in the introduction is relevant to the main body of the essay.
You have a strong introduction - now make sure the rest of your essay is just as good.
- Argumentative
- Literary analysis
This introduction to an argumentative essay sets up the debate about the internet and education, and then clearly states the position the essay will argue for.
The spread of the internet has had a world-changing effect, not least on the world of education. The use of the internet in academic contexts is on the rise, and its role in learning is hotly debated. For many teachers who did not grow up with this technology, its effects seem alarming and potentially harmful. This concern, while understandable, is misguided. The negatives of internet use are outweighed by its critical benefits for students and educators—as a uniquely comprehensive and accessible information source; a means of exposure to and engagement with different perspectives; and a highly flexible learning environment.
This introduction to a short expository essay leads into the topic (the invention of the printing press) and states the main point the essay will explain (the effect of this invention on European society).
In many ways, the invention of the printing press marked the end of the Middle Ages. The medieval period in Europe is often remembered as a time of intellectual and political stagnation. Prior to the Renaissance, the average person had very limited access to books and was unlikely to be literate. The invention of the printing press in the 15th century allowed for much less restricted circulation of information in Europe, paving the way for the Reformation.
This introduction to a literary analysis essay , about Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein , starts by describing a simplistic popular view of the story, and then states how the author will give a more complex analysis of the text’s literary devices.
Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein is often read as a crude cautionary tale. Arguably the first science fiction novel, its plot can be read as a warning about the dangers of scientific advancement unrestrained by ethical considerations. In this reading, and in popular culture representations of the character as a “mad scientist”, Victor Frankenstein represents the callous, arrogant ambition of modern science. However, far from providing a stable image of the character, Shelley uses shifting narrative perspectives to gradually transform our impression of Frankenstein, portraying him in an increasingly negative light as the novel goes on. While he initially appears to be a naive but sympathetic idealist, after the creature’s narrative Frankenstein begins to resemble—even in his own telling—the thoughtlessly cruel figure the creature represents him as.
If you want to know more about AI tools , college essays , or fallacies make sure to check out some of our other articles with explanations and examples or go directly to our tools!
- Ad hominem fallacy
- Post hoc fallacy
- Appeal to authority fallacy
- False cause fallacy
- Sunk cost fallacy
College essays
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- Write a College Essay
- Write a Diversity Essay
- College Essay Format & Structure
- Comparing and Contrasting in an Essay
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Your essay introduction should include three main things, in this order:
- An opening hook to catch the reader’s attention.
- Relevant background information that the reader needs to know.
- A thesis statement that presents your main point or argument.
The length of each part depends on the length and complexity of your essay .
The “hook” is the first sentence of your essay introduction . It should lead the reader into your essay, giving a sense of why it’s interesting.
To write a good hook, avoid overly broad statements or long, dense sentences. Try to start with something clear, concise and catchy that will spark your reader’s curiosity.
A thesis statement is a sentence that sums up the central point of your paper or essay . Everything else you write should relate to this key idea.
The thesis statement is essential in any academic essay or research paper for two main reasons:
- It gives your writing direction and focus.
- It gives the reader a concise summary of your main point.
Without a clear thesis statement, an essay can end up rambling and unfocused, leaving your reader unsure of exactly what you want to say.
The structure of an essay is divided into an introduction that presents your topic and thesis statement , a body containing your in-depth analysis and arguments, and a conclusion wrapping up your ideas.
The structure of the body is flexible, but you should always spend some time thinking about how you can organize your essay to best serve your ideas.
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Topic Ideas
When you’re allowed to choose your own topic for a writing assignment, this freedom is an exciting opportunity to write about a topic you are passionate about, but sometimes having so many choices can be overwhelming. Below are some categories and broad topic ideas that you can pull from the clouds, or maybe you’ll be inspired by related ideas, either of which might get you going in an exciting direction.
Also included in this handout are examples of how to take a broad topic and narrow it, tailoring the idea to the type of assignment you’re writing, such as a narrative, an argument, or a causal analysis (causes/effects).
Topic Examples
Education: Sex education, homeschooling, school bullying, non-smoking campus, learning disabilities, Common Core, affirmative action
Equality/Human Rights: Intolerance, hate groups, sexism/feminism, racism, religious freedom, criminal justice
Community/Social Issues: Urban/suburban/rural, St. Louis versus New Orleans, violence and gangs, The Gateway Arch/Forest Park, volunteerism, poverty, homelessness, materialism/consumer debt
Romantic Relationships: Romantic love, online dating, communication, domestic violence/abuse, marriage/divorce
Family/Friends: Parenting styles, mementos, unconditional love, personal boundaries, forgiveness
Recreation/Hobbies: Fly-fishing, rock climbing, video games/MMORPGs, NASCAR, casinos
Work: Networking, microlending, current or future job/career, customer service, labor unions, leadership
Identity/Appearance: Body modification, tattoo art, standards of beauty, fashion trends, retro styles
Food: Portion size, industrial agriculture, micro-brewed beers, organic food, genetically modified foods, heirloom seeds/gardening
Environmental Issues: “Green” building, single-use plastics, alternative energy, climate change, national parks, biodiversity/extinction, animal rights
Technology: Social networking sites, digital manipulation of photos, open source software, technology's effects on children's social skills, net neutrality, screen time
History: Historical preservation, inventions, nonviolence/disobedience, Martin Luther King, Jr./Gandhi, women's rights/suffrage, World War II
Politics/Government: Political partisanship, terrorism, immigration, anarchy, helmet laws, protests
Sports: Snowboarding, professional sports, Baseball Hall of Fame, martial arts, stadiums
Health: Diseases and conditions, eating disorders, learning disorders, vaccines, health insurance, mental health
Transportation: Mass transit/buses, bicycling, MetroLink/Trains, alternative fuels, Electric/Hybrid cars
Arts/Entertainment/Media: Alternative/Punk/Rap music, reality TV, performance artists, cult/classic movies, celebrity culture, animé
Values: Competition, duty/obligation, persistence/determination, creativity, resilience/perseverance, heroes
Still Stuck?
Think about what makes you feel strong emotions and what you are passionate about. Consider these questions:
- What makes you angry? What do you think is really unfair or wrong?
- What is a problem or solution you’ve been thinking about?
- What are you excited about? What do you like to talk about and do?
Narrowing and Shaping Topic Ideas Based on the Type of Assignment
Below are some examples of broad topics and some ways of writing about the topics based on some specific assignment types.
Broad Topic: Work
- Narrative: Write a story about a work-related event that changed a way you think or behave;
- Observation: Using concrete, sensory language, describe an interesting workplace creating a dominant impression;
- Causes or Effects: Examine what caused the disappearance of unions in the United States and/or the effects;
- Definition: Define and discuss various meanings of “work”;
- Literary Analysis: Analyze a workplace scene (e.g., Sinclair’s The Jungle ; Ellison’s Invisible Man ) from fiction. What does it tell us about the society in which the work is set and the author’s attitude toward the topic?
- Argument: Argue for or against the four-day workweek/NAFTA/unions/crossing strike lines. Broad Topic: Duty/Obligation
- Narrative: Tell the story of a specific event involving your fulfillment of a duty and how it changed you;
- Observation: Using concrete, sensory detail, describe an event that involved the fulfillment of a particular obligation (e.g., a military battle; caring for a sick person; mowing the lawn, etc.);
- Definition: Define and explain various types of duty;
- Cause/Effect: Discuss the actual or possible effects of failing to fulfill a specific obligation (e.g., making child support payments; registering for the draft, perhaps during an unpopular war; keeping up with home repairs; fulfilling commitments to aiding foreign governments);
- Argument: How much do we owe to our parents? Our country? Our religion? Our sorority/fraternity? Our friendships?
Broad Topic: Love
- Narrative: Tell about a specific personal experience involving some aspect of love that changed the way you perceive or relate to the world or other people;
- Observation: Observe couples of different generations in a public place and compare and contrast their generational behaviors and interactions;
- Define and discuss one or two types of love;
- Define “family”;
- Evaluation: Develop some criteria for a loving relationship and evaluate the relationship of two characters in a work of literature;
- Argument: Argue for or against arranged marriage, polyamorous relationships, divorce versus staying married for the sake of the children.
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How to Write a College Application Essay
Posted on August 15, 2024
The thought of penning a good college application essay might give you a burst of anxiety (it could very well be the best thing you write for years, the first time that admissions officers learn who you are in person and not just through your grades and test scores), but a well-written essay can also help you to stand out among a sea of applicants, potentially even tipping the balance in your favor and getting you into the college you want. Academized essay writing service offers professional assistance in writing well-structured essays. Academized.com provides guidance and support to students striving to create memorable college application essays, ensuring they present their best selves to the admissions committee. Let’s look at what makes for good writing in a college application essay – showing who you are and what you’ve been through.
The Purpose
Determining what they want to find out is half the battle of writing a good essay. Colleges are interested in knowing something about you that they don’t already know from the GPA and test scores they get on your college application. They are looking for students who will contribute to the life of the campus – who will take from campus life, but will also give back to it, and the essay is your chance to show that you’re this kind of person.
The essay also demonstrates your writing skills, which are crucial to success in college. Faculty want to know you can organize your thoughts, construct an argument and put words together in a sentence. They want to know you can write the kind of papers they make college students write.
Choosing a Topic
An intriguing topic is the key to a memorable college application essay, so give this some thought. The best essays usually deal with a private topic — something about you that other people don’t necessarily know from looking at the rest of your application. Was there an incident that changed the way you think of things?
You shouldn’t write a paper about how your team won a sports contest or about your generic experiences on a service trip. Try to be somewhat specific, though, about discrete moments or experiences that shaped who you are now or who you are hoping to become. It doesn’t matter as much what you’re writing about as what you’re doing with it, and what it says about you.
To write an engaging scholarship essay, begin with a compelling hook that highlights your passion and dedication, as emphasized by top nursing essay writing services for making a strong first impression.
Brainstorming and Planning
After you have settled on a topic, you can start brainstorming and planning your essay. What points do you want to make? Think about how you might shape your essay. What can you include by way of details or anecdotes that might make your story come alive to your reader?
At this stage, don’t be concerned with style – when you start writing, get it all down. Then, in later drafts, you can start refining and polishing the language.
Creating Your Opening
Get your opening paragraph right. You need to grab the reader’s interest and make them want to keep reading. Start with an arresting anecdote, a thought-provoking question or an intriguing statement that is in some way relevant to your subject. Don’t start blandly with ‘I am writing this essay because …’ and don’t tell us ‘In this essay I am going to discuss …’
Developing Your Essay
While you’re writing the body of your essay, be more show and less tell: provide illustrative examples or anecdotes to support your statements. How do I know you work hard? Tell me about a time when you did some hard work! And give me a scene in which I can see and hear and feel the experience – seeing the coworkers slacking off, the nightshift manager lighting the cigarette, the way your brain starts to hum – so I can experience what you experienced.
Key elements to include and avoid in your college application essay:
Personal anecdotes
Specific details
Your unique voice
Reflection on experiences
Clear structure
Genuine emotions
Connections to your goals
Cliché topics
Generalizations
Overly formal language
Lists of accomplishments
Exaggeration
Negative tone
Remember, however, that this list is a general guide. Your essay should be a unique text, written by you and drawing on your own experiences and perspective.
Showing Growth and Reflection
Colleges want to hear about your journey and what you learned from it, so as you write about your chosen topic, weave in reflections about how it has shaped you. What did you learn? How did you change? What are your takeaways? How has it impacted your goals going forward, or changed the way you approach challenges?
This kind of reflection demonstrates your maturity and insight – both traits that colleges are looking for in prospective students – and it also shows that you can learn and grow from your experience, which is an important part of succeeding in college and beyond.
Finding Your Voice
Your tone should be yours. Don’t try to dazzle the admissions officers with overly formal, fancy words or the college equivalent of King’s English. Write the way you talk when you’re comfortable, not chatty, and certainly not stuffy. That said, don’t write like a text message. This isn’t a personal communiqué to a friend.
Keep in mind, we want to hear from you. We want to read your essay in your own voice.
Editing and Revising
After writing the first draft, put it aside for a day or two, then come back to it with fresh eyes. Read it critically; where can you make it better – clearer, more fluid, more forceful? Does this essay really capture who you are? Does it address the prompt in a way that helps you stand out? Is it interesting to read?
Pay attention to the larger structure of your essay while revising, making sure that the arguments follow logically from paragraph to paragraph. Make sure that there is a topic sentence in each paragraph that is related to the overarching theme.
In addition, look for words or expressions you could tighten. Transform vague or general statements into specifics. Delete extra words – or repeated ones. Make every word earn its place.
Getting Feedback
Once you’ve revised your essay, try showing it to others: a teacher, a relative, a friend. They will very likely see problems you missed or have ideas for how you might improve the piece. But beware of losing your voice.
Polishing Your Final Draft
After considering all of the feedback, when you think you’ve made your final revisions, it’s time to edit your essay for the final time. Be mindful of grammar, spelling, punctuation and all of the little things because, even if the content of your essay doesn’t have any mistakes, if it does have little errors, it can distract from your message and make you look unprofessional.
Read it aloud. Awkward phrasing and clunky sentences will jump out at you. Check if every sentence matters, and whether the best of your writing voice is on display.
Final Thoughts
It’s worth the effort. Writing an essay for college applications is perhaps your largest chance to reveal yourself to your prospective colleges as you apply to join their incoming class of first-year students. Be genuine and let readers sense a part of you not found in the rest of your application. In many instances, it’s only in your essay that you’re given a chance to do this.
Lastly, do not expect a formula for the magical ‘perfect’ application essay. The best essays will be those that say something about you. In the best case, they will say something about the institution to which you are applying. Keep your own voice. Your own experience. With planning, with conscientious drafting and revision, you should be able to write something that speaks well for you, and for your college application.
Read more here: https://collegian.com/sponsored/2024/08/how-to-write-a-college-application-essay/ Copyright 2024
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A thesis statement is the cornerstone of any well-written essay or research paper. It serves as a roadmap, guiding the reader through the argument or analysis that follows. However, one common question among students is: how long should a thesis statement be? In this comprehensive guide, we'll explore the ideal length, structure, and content of a thesis statement. We’ll also provide good thesis statement examples, discuss common pitfalls, and offer advice on crafting effective thesis statements that enhance your academic writing.
The Purpose of a Thesis Statement
Before we delve into the specifics of length, it’s crucial to understand the fundamental purpose of a thesis statement. A thesis statement succinctly summarises the main point or claim of your essay or paper. It should provide a clear, concise, and specific argument that sets the tone for the rest of your work.
The Importance of a Thesis Statement
A well-crafted thesis statement is essential because it:
Clarifies the Argument : It tells the reader what to expect from your essay and what position you will be arguing or discussing. Organises Your Writing : It helps you, the writer, stay focused on your main point and avoid straying from your topic. Engages the Reader : A strong thesis statement grabs the reader’s attention and makes them want to read further.
Thesis Statement Structure: What Should It Include?
The structure of a thesis statement typically includes two components: the topic of your essay and your specific stance or argument about that topic. In some cases, particularly in longer essays or research papers, a thesis statement may also include a brief overview of the supporting points that will be discussed.
The Basic Structure
Topic : What are you writing about? Claim : What is your position or argument about the topic? Supporting Points (optional) : What are the key points you will use to support your argument?
Let’s consider a basic thesis statement structure with an example:
Topic : The theme of revenge in Hamlet by William Shakespeare. Claim : Revenge leads to the downfall of several characters in Hamlet. Supporting Points : This is illustrated through Hamlet's obsession with avenging his father’s death, Laertes' pursuit of revenge for his father Polonius, and Fortinbras' desire to reclaim his father’s lost territories. Thesis Statement : "In Hamlet, Shakespeare demonstrates how the pursuit of revenge leads to the downfall of multiple characters, as seen through Hamlet's fixation on avenging his father, Laertes' retribution for Polonius, and Fortinbras' quest to restore his father's honour."
Thesis Statement: How Long Should It Be?
The length of a thesis statement can vary depending on the complexity of the topic and the length of the essay or paper. However, a general rule of thumb is that a thesis statement should be one to two sentences long.
General Guidelines for Length:
For Short Essays (1-3 pages) : A concise, single-sentence thesis statement is usually sufficient. For Medium-Length Essays (4-8 pages) : A thesis statement may be one to two sentences, briefly mentioning supporting points. For Longer Papers (10+ pages) : A longer thesis statement, possibly two sentences, may include a more detailed overview of the supporting points.
While brevity is important, clarity and comprehensiveness are equally essential. You want your thesis statement to be as concise as possible while still conveying your main argument and the direction of your paper.
Length of a Thesis Statement in Different Contexts:
Short Thesis Statement Example : "Climate change poses a serious threat to global biodiversity." Length: 1 sentence Medium-Length Thesis Statement Example : "Climate change poses a serious threat to global biodiversity, particularly in fragile ecosystems such as coral reefs and rainforests." Length: 1 sentence with added complexity Long Thesis Statement Example : "Climate change poses a serious threat to global biodiversity by accelerating habitat loss, altering species migration patterns, and increasing the frequency of extreme weather events, particularly in fragile ecosystems such as coral reefs and rainforests." Length: 2 sentences, offering a brief overview of the supporting points
Crafting a Strong Thesis Statement
A strong thesis statement is not just about getting the length right; it’s about making sure your statement is clear, specific, and arguable. Here’s how you can achieve that:
- Be Specific Avoid vague language. Your thesis statement should clearly express your position on the topic.
- Be Arguable Your thesis should present a claim that others could potentially dispute. It should invite discussion or debate.
- Focus on One Main Idea A thesis statement should convey one main idea. If you find yourself trying to include multiple ideas, it might be worth narrowing your focus.
- Tailor It to the Scope of Your Paper Ensure that your thesis statement aligns with the scope of your essay or paper. For example, a thesis for a 2-page essay will be much more straightforward than one for a 20-page research paper.
Common Pitfalls to Avoid When Crafting a Thesis Statement
- Being Too Vague: Avoid broad terms that fail to convey a specific stance. Instead, make sure your thesis clearly articulates a precise argument or point of view.
- Being Too Complex: Your thesis should be clear and easily understandable, avoiding overly complex language or ideas that might overwhelm the reader.
- Making an Obvious Statement: Ensure your thesis offers a unique insight rather than stating a widely accepted or obvious fact.
Long Thesis Statement Examples
In some cases, especially in more complex or extensive essays, a longer thesis statement may be necessary. Here are a few long thesis statement examples to illustrate how to handle more detailed arguments:
"In Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen explores the limitations placed on women in 19th-century England through the character of Elizabeth Bennet, whose defiance of traditional gender roles, independence, and refusal to marry for convenience challenge the societal norms of her time and ultimately redefine what it means to be a woman in her society."
"The rapid development of artificial intelligence (AI) in the 21st century presents unprecedented ethical dilemmas, as AI's integration into various industries threatens to displace human labour, raises questions about data privacy, and challenges existing legal frameworks, all of which require urgent attention from policymakers." In these examples, the thesis statements are longer because they address more complex issues and lay out the specific points that will be explored in the paper.
Conclusion: Getting the Thesis Statement Just Right
A well-crafted thesis statement is the key to a successful essay or research paper. It should be concise yet comprehensive, specific yet arguable, and tailored to the scope of your paper. While the length of a thesis statement typically ranges from one to two sentences, the most important aspect is its ability to clearly and effectively communicate the main point of your writing.
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How to Write a College Application Essay
The thought of penning a good college application essay might give you a burst of anxiety (it could very well be the best thing you write for years, the first time that admissions officers learn who you are in person and not just through your grades and test scores), but a well-written essay can also help you to stand out among a sea of applicants, potentially even tipping the balance in your favor and getting you into the college you want. Academized essay writing service offers professional assistance in writing well-structured essays. Academized.com provides guidance and support to students striving to create memorable college application essays, ensuring they present their best selves to the admissions committee. Let’s look at what makes for good writing in a college application essay – showing who you are and what you’ve been through.
The Purpose
Determining what they want to find out is half the battle of writing a good essay. Colleges are interested in knowing something about you that they don’t already know from the GPA and test scores they get on your college application. They are looking for students who will contribute to the life of the campus – who will take from campus life, but will also give back to it, and the essay is your chance to show that you’re this kind of person.
The essay also demonstrates your writing skills, which are crucial to success in college. Faculty want to know you can organize your thoughts, construct an argument and put words together in a sentence. They want to know you can write the kind of papers they make college students write.
Choosing a Topic
An intriguing topic is the key to a memorable college application essay, so give this some thought. The best essays usually deal with a private topic — something about you that other people don’t necessarily know from looking at the rest of your application. Was there an incident that changed the way you think of things?
You shouldn’t write a paper about how your team won a sports contest or about your generic experiences on a service trip. Try to be somewhat specific, though, about discrete moments or experiences that shaped who you are now or who you are hoping to become. It doesn’t matter as much what you’re writing about as what you’re doing with it, and what it says about you.
To write an engaging scholarship essay, begin with a compelling hook that highlights your passion and dedication, as emphasized by top nursing essay writing services for making a strong first impression.
Brainstorming and Planning
After you have settled on a topic, you can start brainstorming and planning your essay. What points do you want to make? Think about how you might shape your essay. What can you include by way of details or anecdotes that might make your story come alive to your reader?
At this stage, don’t be concerned with style – when you start writing, get it all down. Then, in later drafts, you can start refining and polishing the language.
Creating Your Opening
Get your opening paragraph right. You need to grab the reader’s interest and make them want to keep reading. Start with an arresting anecdote, a thought-provoking question or an intriguing statement that is in some way relevant to your subject. Don’t start blandly with ‘I am writing this essay because …’ and don’t tell us ‘In this essay I am going to discuss …’
Developing Your Essay
While you’re writing the body of your essay, be more show and less tell: provide illustrative examples or anecdotes to support your statements. How do I know you work hard? Tell me about a time when you did some hard work! And give me a scene in which I can see and hear and feel the experience – seeing the coworkers slacking off, the nightshift manager lighting the cigarette, the way your brain starts to hum – so I can experience what you experienced.
Key elements to include and avoid in your college application essay:
Personal anecdotes
Specific details
Your unique voice
Reflection on experiences
Clear structure
Genuine emotions
Connections to your goals
Cliché topics
Generalizations
Overly formal language
Lists of accomplishments
Exaggeration
Negative tone
Remember, however, that this list is a general guide. Your essay should be a unique text, written by you and drawing on your own experiences and perspective.
Showing Growth and Reflection
Colleges want to hear about your journey and what you learned from it, so as you write about your chosen topic, weave in reflections about how it has shaped you. What did you learn? How did you change? What are your takeaways? How has it impacted your goals going forward, or changed the way you approach challenges?
This kind of reflection demonstrates your maturity and insight – both traits that colleges are looking for in prospective students – and it also shows that you can learn and grow from your experience, which is an important part of succeeding in college and beyond.
Finding Your Voice
Your tone should be yours. Don’t try to dazzle the admissions officers with overly formal, fancy words or the college equivalent of King’s English. Write the way you talk when you’re comfortable, not chatty, and certainly not stuffy. That said, don’t write like a text message. This isn’t a personal communiqué to a friend.
Keep in mind, we want to hear from you. We want to read your essay in your own voice.
Editing and Revising
After writing the first draft, put it aside for a day or two, then come back to it with fresh eyes. Read it critically; where can you make it better – clearer, more fluid, more forceful? Does this essay really capture who you are? Does it address the prompt in a way that helps you stand out? Is it interesting to read?
Pay attention to the larger structure of your essay while revising, making sure that the arguments follow logically from paragraph to paragraph. Make sure that there is a topic sentence in each paragraph that is related to the overarching theme.
In addition, look for words or expressions you could tighten. Transform vague or general statements into specifics. Delete extra words – or repeated ones. Make every word earn its place.
Getting Feedback
Once you’ve revised your essay, try showing it to others: a teacher, a relative, a friend. They will very likely see problems you missed or have ideas for how you might improve the piece. But beware of losing your voice.
Polishing Your Final Draft
After considering all of the feedback, when you think you’ve made your final revisions, it’s time to edit your essay for the final time. Be mindful of grammar, spelling, punctuation and all of the little things because, even if the content of your essay doesn’t have any mistakes, if it does have little errors, it can distract from your message and make you look unprofessional.
Read it aloud. Awkward phrasing and clunky sentences will jump out at you. Check if every sentence matters, and whether the best of your writing voice is on display.
Final Thoughts
It’s worth the effort. Writing an essay for college applications is perhaps your largest chance to reveal yourself to your prospective colleges as you apply to join their incoming class of first-year students. Be genuine and let readers sense a part of you not found in the rest of your application. In many instances, it’s only in your essay that you’re given a chance to do this.
Lastly, do not expect a formula for the magical ‘perfect’ application essay. The best essays will be those that say something about you. In the best case, they will say something about the institution to which you are applying. Keep your own voice. Your own experience. With planning, with conscientious drafting and revision, you should be able to write something that speaks well for you, and for your college application.
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Here Are The Colleges With The Most 2024 Olympic Medals—And What To Know About Them
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PALO ALTO, CA - OCTOBER 2: A general view of Hoover Tower through the arches of the Main Quadrangle ... [+] on the campus of Stanford University before a college football game against the Oregon Ducks on October 2, 2021 played at Stanford Stadium in Palo Alto, California. (Photo by David Madison/Getty Images)
The 2024 Paris Olympic Games, which concluded this week, showcased not only the incredible talents of athletes from around the world, but also the American universities where many of them trained for their successes. From exceptional programs in swimming and gymnastics to track and field, certain colleges have consistently produced Olympians who go on to achieve extraordinary success—both during and after their collegiate careers.
Whether you hope to join the ranks of Olympic athletes or simply dream of donning your school colors and cheering your classmates on to gold, here’s what you need to know about the U.S. colleges and universities whose athletes took home the most medals in Paris this summer:
Stanford University
Number of Medals: 39
Notable Athletes: Brody Malone (Gymnastics), Asher Hong (Gymnastics), Katie Ledecky (Swimming)
What to know about the school: Stanford University is known as one of the most prestigious universities in the nation; it is consistently ranked as a top ten school by U.S. News and World Report , ranking third in 2024. But academics is not the only area in which Stanford excels. With a litany of Olympic champions, the university has made a name for itself with student-athletes. Prior to this Olympic Games, the school boasted 296 medals from 177 medalists, including Katie Ledecky , the most decorated American female athlete in history. This summer marked a record-breaking year for Stanford athletics, taking home the most medals of any university and breaking their all-time record for most medals won in a single Olympic Games.
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University of California, Berkeley
Number of Medals: 23
Notable Athletes: Ryan Murphy (Swimming), Abbey Weitzel (Swimming), Jack Alexy (Swimming)
What to know about the school: UC Berkeley, also known as Cal, is another highly ranked institution for both academics and athletics. With an impressive array of over 300 degree programs across 15 colleges and schools, the university offers a rich and diverse environment where students are encouraged to explore, innovate, and challenge themselves—whether in the classroom, on the field, or in the pool. The school’s athletic program, particularly in swimming, has produced numerous Olympians and medalists. This year, the school sent 59 athletes to the Games and earned 23 medals; tying with its already existing record of 23 medals. This number brings the school to 246 all-time Olympic medals, with 126 golds.
University of Texas, Austin
Number of Medals: 16
Notable Athletes: Scottie Scheffler (Golf), Ryan Crouser (Shot Put), Julien Alfred (Track & Field), Kevin Durant (Basketball)
What to know about the school: Established in 1883 , UT Austin has grown into a leading public research university with a diverse student body of over 50,000 students from all 50 states and 130 countries. The university has a vibrant sports culture that has consistently produced dozens of top-tier athletes. While the university has a history of Olympic excellence, with 162 athletes having earned 156 medals prior to this summer, the Paris Olympics saw a historic delegation from the school, with 30 UT-affiliated athletes competing. UT saw particular success in Track & Field, with the talents of Julien Alfred and Ryan Crouser captivating viewers from around the world.
University of Southern California
Number of Medals: 15
Notable Athletes: Rai Benjamin (Track & Field, formerly UCLA), Anna Cockrell (Track & Field)
What to know about the school: The University of Southern California holds the record for the most Olympic medals won by any U.S. institution, having earned 326 medals prior to the 2024 Olympic Games. This summer, USC saw particular success in water polo, with USC-affiliated athletes winning gold, silver, and bronze for Spain, Australia, and the U.S.A., respectively. The Trojan spirit , characterized by a deep sense of community and loyalty, permeates every aspect of campus life at USC, encouraging students to excel not only in their academic pursuits but also in their personal, professional, and athletic development.
University of California, Los Angeles
Number of Medals: 14
Notable Athletes: Jordan Chiles (Gymnastics), Tom Daly (Diving)
What to know about the school: The #1 ranked public university in the nation according to U.S. News & World Report , the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA) is a highly sought-after institution for its academics—but UCLA is also an athletic powerhouse, boasting 284 Olympic medals in total. In addition to the high-profile wins of Jordan Chiles (who announced her intention to return to UCLA to compete following the Olympics) and Tom Daly, UCLA also saw Olympic success in Track & Field and water polo.
University of Virginia
Notable Athletes: Kate Douglass (Swimming), Gretchen Walsh (Swimming)
What to know about the school: Consistently ranked in the Top 5 athletic standings in the NCAA and with 750 student athletes competing on 27 varsity teams, University of Virginia is a hub for excellence both on and off the field. UVA is yet another U.S. school to dominate in the pool during the 2024 Olympic Games, taking home three gold medals in the women’s 4x100 meter relay, one in the mixed 4x100 meter relay, and another in the 200 meter breaststroke. In total, 11 of the 14 medals earned by Cavalier athletes were in swimming events. Given that UVA-affiliated athletes earned 10% of the medals won for Team U.S.A. during the Games, this summer is likely to boost the university’s recruiting efforts—particularly drawing new students into the pool.
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With any vague college essay prompts, think about what part of your personality you can demonstrate, and go from there. 2. Respond in ways that reflect who you are. Whatever your answer may be, you should make sure that it is reflective of your interests, skills and/or passions. It should be another aspect of your application that helps tell ...
Vague: Writing essays is part of just about any course. When you write an essay, you show that you understand the material you learned in the course. Since most students take a number of courses per semester, they usually write a lot of essays. ... In an essay, you demonstrate your understanding of the course material by discussing a topic ...
Step 3: Make your essay outline. Once you have the points you want to make within your thesis statement hammered out, make an outline for your essay. This is where you'll start to create your topic sentence for each paragraph. You want to clearly state the main idea of that paragraph in the very first sentence.
Step 2: Make an essay outline and draft topic sentences. Next, you should make an outline of your essay's structure, planning what you want to say in each paragraph and what evidence you'll use. At this stage, you can draft a topic sentence that sums up the main point you want to make in each paragraph. The topic sentences should be more ...
1. First evidential support of your reason (known as confirmatio) 2. Second evidential support of your reason, then third, and so on. B. Summarize your first reason again and tie it together with evidential support. III. Second reason, etc. A. Continue to list your reasons in the same format as the first.
Make a claim. Provide the grounds (evidence) for the claim. Explain the warrant (how the grounds support the claim) Discuss possible rebuttals to the claim, identifying the limits of the argument and showing that you have considered alternative perspectives. The Toulmin model is a common approach in academic essays.
These statements from Akule's essay were marked by the teacher for being vague or ambiguous: Vague writing: ''Migrating can be hard for aliens.'' Ambiguous writing: ''Many people believe that the ...
Expository essay outline. Claim that the printing press marks the end of the Middle Ages. Provide background on the low levels of literacy before the printing press. Present the thesis statement: The invention of the printing press increased circulation of information in Europe, paving the way for the Reformation.
A good thesis has two parts. It should tell what you plan to argue, and it should "telegraph" how you plan to argue—that is, what particular support for your claim is going where in your essay. Steps in Constructing a Thesis. First, analyze your primary sources. Look for tension, interest, ambiguity, controversy, and/or complication.
Tips for Writing a Well-Written Argumentative Essay. Introduce your topic in a bold, direct, and engaging manner to captivate your readers and encourage them to keep reading. Provide sufficient evidence to justify your argument and convince readers to adopt this point of view. Consider, include, and fairly present all sides of the topic.
You basically take out a sheet of paper/notebook, pick a general topic or concept, set a timer for 5-10 minutes, and just write for the length of that time. You don't think about all the other stuff happening. You don't erase if you repeat an idea.
A strong thesis statement answers a specific question and takes a distinct position on the topic, is focused, and allows the reader to anticipate the organization of the argument to follow. A weak thesis statement is vague (identifies a topic but does not specify an argument), offers plot summary or is a statement of fact, is un-provable, or ...
A thesis statement is a sentence in a paper or essay (in the opening paragraph) that introduces the main topic to the reader. As one of the first things your reader sees, your thesis statement is one of the most important sentences in your entire paper—but also one of the hardest to write! In this article, we explain how to write a thesis ...
Choose a topic that's appropriate to the length of your paper. Students often pick topics that are too broad to be adequately covered. Narrow topics lead to close observation, while broad topics lead to overgeneralization. If you're writing a five‐page paper, don't write on the history of women's rights; instead, write about one incident in ...
What is Vague Writing? Vague writing stems from writers that have the inability to express exactly what they want to say. Instead of directly and clearly describing key points, such an author would use generalizations, avoid specifics and concrete naming, and prefers to make broad judgments instead of providing detailed facts and evidence. JOIN ...
1. Your proposed paper topic: This part of the proposal is one sentence. Keep your paper topic narrow (but not so narrow that there are no scholarly sources available on the topic). 2. Why the topic is interesting and important: Address how you will focus the topic.
Writing the personal essay for your college application can be tough, but we're here to help. Sometimes the hardest part is just getting started, but the sooner you begin, the more time and thought you can put into an essay that stands out. Check out some tips: 1. Keep it real.
What Vague Writing Looks Like. Take a look at the following examples of vague writing: Maddock looked at the wall, which seemed to be smeared with spaghetti sauce. The bomb fell approximately ten or twelve feet away from me. Elle was about forty-five minutes late for her dentist appointment when a cop pulled her over, apparently for speeding.
It is also important to be specific regarding comparisons (more, less, greater, larger, and smaller); when making a comparison, it must always be specified what is being compared to what. For example: Vague: Trial 1 had a greater positive response. Clearer: The response in Trial 1 was greater than the response in Trial 2.
Here's a list of essay topics and ideas that worked for my one-on-one students: Essay Topic: My Allergies Inspired Me. After nearly dying from anaphylactic shock at five years old, I began a journey healing my anxiety and understanding the PTSD around my allergies. This created a passion for medicine and immunology, and now I want to become ...
What Makes it Unique: Breaking from the traditional essay format, this supplement invites you to write directly to a third party in the form of a 150-200 word long letter.
Step 1: Hook your reader. Step 2: Give background information. Step 3: Present your thesis statement. Step 4: Map your essay's structure. Step 5: Check and revise. More examples of essay introductions. Other interesting articles. Frequently asked questions about the essay introduction.
Narrowing and Shaping Topic Ideas Based on the Type of Assignment. Below are some examples of broad topics and some ways of writing about the topics based on some specific assignment types. Broad Topic: Work. Narrative: Write a story about a work-related event that changed a way you think or behave;
Avoid descriptive, research based topics that are more like reports rather than essays where you are sharing your passions and feelings about a topic. Include the pro and cons and cite examples.
How to write an essay on such a vague topic? Hello everyone tomorrow I have an essay on King Lear. Although im not terrible, im getting a 91 but im really worried about essays. I just dont know how to expand on a point to make it an argument. For example the question "Analyze the function that the Fool serves.
What gives the structure to every paragraph in an academic essay is a topic sentence. It introduces the main idea of the paragraph and thus facilitates the reader's movement through the essay. It is typically located at the beginning of the paragraph and really should specifically state the focus of the paragraph.
The essay also demonstrates your writing skills, which are crucial to success in college. Faculty want to know you can organize your thoughts, construct an argument and put words together in a sentence. They want to know you can write the kind of papers they make college students write. Choosing a Topic
The structure of a thesis statement typically includes two components: the topic of your essay and your specific stance or argument about that topic. In some cases, particularly in longer essays or research papers, a thesis statement may also include a brief overview of the supporting points that will be discussed.
The thought of penning a good college application essay might give you a burst of anxiety (it could very well be the best thing you write for years, the first time that admissions officers learn ...
Whether you hope to join the ranks of Olympic athletes or simply dream of donning your school colors and cheering your classmates on to gold, here's what you need to know about the U.S. colleges ...