How to write a financial need statement for your scholarship application (with examples!)

So you’re applying for a scholarship that asks you about your financial need. What do you say? How honest or specific should you be? What is TMI? In this article, we break down how to pen an awesome financial need scholarship essay or statement.

What to include in a financial need scholarship essay

Template to structure your financial need scholarship essay, introduction: your basic profile, body: your financial situation and hardships, conclusion: how you would benefit from this scholarship, was this financial need essay for a college financial aid application , now, reuse that same essay to apply for more scholarships, additional resources to help you write your financial need scholarship essay.

Writing a financial need scholarship essay

Many scholarships and college financial aid awards are “need-based,” given to students whose financial situation requires additional support. That’s why one of the most common college scholarship essays is a statement of financial need. This might be very explicit (“Explain your financial need”), somewhat explicit (“Describe your financial situation”), or quite open-ended (“Explain why you need this scholarship”).

In all cases, scholarship providers want to get a sense of your family’s financial picture: what your family income is, if you personally contribute to it (do you have a job?), and how much additional money you need to attend your target college (your “financial gap”).

If the essay prompt is a bit more open-ended (“Explain how this scholarship would help you”), your essay should probably be a combination of a financial need statement and a career goals / academic goals essay.  That’s because you want to show how the award will help you financially and in your academic or career goals.

Usually this statement of financial need is a pretty short scholarship essay (150-300 words), so unlike a college essay or personal statement where you have ample word count to tell anecdotes, you’ll likely need to get right to the point. 

Be sure to include: 

  • If you are an underrepresented group at college, for instance, part of an ethnic minority or the first in your family to go to college
  • Any relevant family circumstances, like if your parents are immigrants or refugees, as well as your parents’ occupation and how many children/family members they support financially
  • How you are currently paying for college, including what you personally are doing to contribute financially (like working student jobs)
  • What financial challenges/difficulties your family is facing, for instance, if a parent recently lost their job
  • How you would benefit from the scholarship–including your academic and career goals (if word count allows)

Also remember to write in an optimistic tone. Writing about your financial situation or hardships might not be the most positive thing to share. But you can turn it around with an optimistic tone by writing about how these challenges have taught you resiliency and grit.

Student writing a financial need scholarship essay

Give a short introduction to who you are, highlighting any family characteristics that might make you part of an underrepresented group at college. 

“I am a first-generation American and the first in my family to go to college. My family moved from El Salvador to New York when I was seven years old, to escape the violence there.”

Example 2: 

“I am from a working-class family in Minnesota. My family never had a lot, but we pooled our efforts together to make ends meet. My parents both worked full-time (my father as a mechanic, my mother as a receptionist at the local gym), while my siblings and I all worked weekend jobs to contribute to the family income.”

Dive into the details. How are you currently planning to pay for college? The idea here is to show that you and your family have made a good-faith effort to earn enough money to pay your tuition, but that it has simply not been enough. 

Make sure you describe your parents’ occupation, any savings (like a 529 College Savings Account), and any student jobs. You might also discuss any sudden changes in fortune (e.g. parent fell ill or lost their job) that have ruined your original financial plans. 

Example 

As immigrants with limited English, my parents have had to accept low-paying jobs. My father is an Uber driver, and my mother is a housekeeper. They earn just enough to pay our rent and put food on the table, so I’ve always known they could not help me pay for college.  So I’ve been proactive about earning and saving my own money. Since age 11, I’ve worked odd jobs (like mowing my neighbors’ lawns). At age 16, I started working at the mall after school and on weekends. Through all these jobs, I’ve saved about $3000. But even with my financial aid grants, I need to pay $8000 more per year to go to college. 

Bring it home by wrapping up your story.  Explain how you plan to use the financial aid if you’re awarded this scholarship. How will you benefit from this award? What will you put the money toward, and how will it help you achieve your academic and/or career goals?

Scholarship review boards want to know that their money will be put to good use, supporting a student who has clear plans for the future, and the motivation and determination to make those plans a reality. This is like a shortened, one-paragraph version of the “Why do you deserve this scholarship?” essay . 

Winning $5000 would help me close the financial gap and take less in student loans. This is particularly important for me because I plan to study social work and eventually work in a role to support my community. However, since these jobs are not well paid, repaying significant student loans would be difficult. Your scholarship would allow me to continue down this path, to eventually support my community, without incurring debt I can’t afford.
My plan is to study human biology at UC San Diego, where I have been admitted, and eventually pursue a career as a Nurse-Practitioner. I know that being pre-med will be a real academic challenge, and this scholarship would help me focus on those tough classes, rather than worrying about how to pay for them. The $2000 award would be equivalent to about 150 hours of working at a student job. That’s 150 hours I can instead focus on studying, graduating, and achieving my goals. 

Sometimes this financial need statement isn’t for an external scholarship. Instead, it’s for your college financial aid office.

In that case, you’re usually writing this statement for one of two reasons:

  • You’re writing an appeal letter , to request additional financial aid, after your original financial aid offer wasn’t enough. In this case, you’ll want to make sure you’re being extra specific about your finances.
  • You’re applying for a specific endowed scholarship that considers financial need. In this case, your financial need essay can be quite similar to what we’ve outlined above.

Now that you’ve written a killer financial need scholarship essay, you have one of the most common scholarship essays ready on hand, to submit to other scholarships too.

You can sign up for a free Going Merry account today to get a personalized list of hundreds of scholarships matched to your profile. You can even save essays (like this one!) to reuse in more than one application.  

Writing a financial need scholarship essay

You might also be interested in these other blog posts related to essay writing:

  • What’s the right scholarship essay format and structure?
  • How to write a winning scholarship essay about your academic goals
  • How to write an awesome essay about your career goals
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Financial Need Scholarship Essay Examples (2023)

Jennifer Finetti Oct 2, 2022

Financial Need Scholarship Essay Examples (2023)

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Many scholarships are awarded based on financial need. In order to win these scholarships, you must explain the nature of your financial need. In the guide below, we’ll explain how to write these types of essays to increase your chances of winning. Check out these scholarship essay examples for financial need scholarships.

How to write financial need scholarship essays

Here are some tips for writing financial need scholarship essays:

  • Maintain a positive tone throughout the essay . You do not want to come across as self-pitying. Focus on ways you learned and grew from past experiences – how they made you stronger.
  • Do not diminish other people’s suffering. This is a competition, but that doesn’t mean you should belittle your competitors. In fact, it would be better to say “I know there are many worthy candidates for this scholarship, but…” than to say “I have suffered far more than…” Show respect in everything you write.
  • Frame your essay around a specific event. You may add other details if you have space to, but use one experience as the thesis for your essay.
  • Avoid controversial statements and opinions. When discussing events from your past, do not belittle someone else or talk negatively about a group of people. You never know who will be reading your essay.
  • Tell your story with honesty. Do not fabricate any details to make yourself sound needy. Your past and present circumstances will speak for themselves.
  • Don’t try to sound philosophical. Some students will do this because they think it makes them seem smarter, but it rarely has that effect. Focus on proofreading and writing solid content. That is enough intelligence on its own.
  • Discuss your career goals, if possible. You may not have room for this if the essay is short. If you do have room though, discussing your career goals will indicate a plan for the future. Review boards reward determination.

You know why you need financial aid. Tap into the key elements of your circumstances and use them to craft the perfect essay.

Many scholarships are awarded based on financial need. In order to win these scholarships, you must explain the nature of your financial need. In the guide below, we’ve provided examples of scholarship essays for financial need scholarships, along with some tips to help you write your own essay.

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Example 1: “Provide a statement of financial need”

Some scholarships will simply ask for a statement of financial need. There are no parameters to follow. You’re left to write whatever you want. Typically, a statement of financial need is two or three small paragraphs. This will come out to roughly 150-200 words, but it could be slightly longer. Think of this as a cover letter for your scholarship application, highlighting the key elements of your financial need. Don’t build up to the thesis. Get directly to the point.

I am the first person in my family to graduate high school, and thus the first to attend college. Both of my parents dropped out of school when they were teenagers. Because of their limited education, they have always worked in entry-level positions, earning barely enough to put food on the table. My first job I got was at the age of 12 delivering papers, and I have worked hard ever since to relieve pressure from my family. I enrolled in Mississippi’s HELP program during my senior year, which covers tuition and fees at select colleges in the state. I also have a Federal Pell Grant to cover my housing. However, I still need funding for books, supplies, and transportation to campus as needed. I am an engineering student, and our classes come with high fees. My parents cannot contribute to my college expenses, and I cannot work much while I’m in school. This scholarship would help me avoid costly student loans that could take years to repay.  

Example 2: “Describe your financial need in 100 words”

This essay is even shorter than the financial need statement. It may be one of several short answer questions you need to fill out. Working with 100 words is tricky. That only leaves room for about 7-10 sentences, depending on length. Make compelling statements using the fewest words possible.

Also note that grammar errors and misspellings will be much more noticeable in this short essay. Carefully proofread your writing before submitting the scholarship application.

I got pregnant and dropped out of high school when I was 15. By the age of 20, I had two more children, and we all shared a one-bedroom apartment. I worked three jobs to pay the bills, but I never earned much. When my oldest started high school, I did the same. I got my GED at 29 and enrolled in nursing school. My financial status has improved now with a GED, but I’m still a single mom with three kids. I want to become a registered nurse to give my children a stable future. I appreciate your consideration.

Word Count: 100

Example 3: “Explain your financial need in 500 or more words”

This scholarship essay prompt is the opposite of the one above. You have much more room to discuss your circumstances. Talk about your family life, your income, and other restraints that contribute to your financial aid . Try not to throw too much in the essay though. You want the information to flow together seamlessly. Edit carefully, and give the readers a full view of your situation.

My name is Brandon Noviello. I am a sophomore on track to earn my Bachelor of Arts in Sociology. I need financial aid because I do not have a family to contribute to my education. I was in foster care for two years before I aged out of the system, and now I am pursuing a degree completely on my own. I was raised by a wonderful woman who didn’t always have a wonderful life. My mother got pregnant after a sexual assault, but she was determined to raise a smart, successful man. She went through an accelerated program to graduate high school before I was born. She devoted the rest of her life to supporting me, both financially and emotionally. My mother’s family cut ties with her the moment she became pregnant. Life wasn’t easy for us, but I never wanted for anything. She always found a way to keep me fed, dressed, and in school. Unfortunately, she lost a long-term battle with depression when I was 16, and I was put into the foster system until I reached adulthood. I did not have a positive experience with foster care, but I admit, I had no desire to. My mother’s passing weighed heavily on my mind, and I felt an overwhelming sense of anger, regret, and frustration. There was one gleam of hope in my experience though. I had a great social worker. I fought her decisions every step of the way, and she still managed to find a family to get me through high school. My social worker was the only person I invited to my graduation ceremony.  She helped me realize how much one person’s efforts can make a difference in the lives of others. I was only one of countless children she had helped over the years. I researched how to become a social worker so I could help other children like me. My plan is to work with the Department of Human Services in the foster care and adoption division after I graduate. In order to make my dreams a reality, I need financial aid. I am working as a server to pay for food, utilities, and basic necessities, but I do not earn enough to pay for college as well. I go to school during the day and work at night. Furthermore, I have a maximum Pell Grant to cover most of my tuition, but I still need help with other expenses. I did not do well in high school as a result of my mom’s passing, but I have done well in college. I have a 3.25 cumulative GPA, and I have never made less than an A in a degree-related course. As such, I am committed to being successful despite my circumstances, and I want to help young people find that motivation within themselves. I look forward to working with children and teens in the foster system, so I can be the hope that someone else was for me.

Word Count: 498

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As a parent who recently helped her own kids embark on their college journeys, Jennifer approaches the transition from high school to college from a unique perspective. She truly enjoys engaging with students – helping them to build the confidence, knowledge, and insight needed to pursue their educational and career goals, while also empowering them with the strategies and skills needed to access scholarships and financial aid that can help limit college costs. She understands the importance of ensuring access to the edtech tools and resources that can make this process easier and more equitable - this drive to support underserved populations is what drew her to ScholarshipOwl. Jennifer has coached students from around the world, as well as in-person with local students in her own community. Her areas of focus include career exploration, major selection, college search and selection, college application assistance, financial aid and scholarship consultation, essay review and feedback, and more. She works with students who are at the top of their class, as well as those who are struggling. She firmly believes that all students, regardless of their circumstances, can succeed if they stay focused and work hard in school. Jennifer earned her MA in Counseling Psychology from National University, and her BA in Psychology from University of California, Santa Cruz.

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How to Write a Financial Aid Statement

Last Updated: February 1, 2023 Fact Checked

This article was co-authored by Michael R. Lewis . Michael R. Lewis is a retired corporate executive, entrepreneur, and investment advisor in Texas. He has over 40 years of experience in business and finance, including as a Vice President for Blue Cross Blue Shield of Texas. He has a BBA in Industrial Management from the University of Texas at Austin. This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources. This article has been viewed 555,921 times.

The financial aid statement is a simple, short piece of writing that students may include on a financial aid letter, in an essay, or in other communications to a financial aid department. The financial aid statement may not be a full communication on its own, but rather an element of a more complex financial aid appeal. If you need to write such a statement in order to reach out to a university or college's financial aid office, follow some basic steps.

Sample Statements and Things to Include

personal statement for financial aid example

Writing a Statement of Financial Need

Step 1 Write the introduction.

  • For example, you could write the following: “My parents moved to the United States from Albania in order to give us better opportunities. As their oldest child, I will be the first in our family to attend college.”

Step 2 Explain how you are currently paying for college.

  • For example, write something like this: “I have worked to help support my family since I was 16 years old. Currently, I work on the weekends as a waitress to support myself. My parents also give me what they can each month. Since my parents didn’t speak English when we moved here, it was very difficult for them to support our family. My mother worked many hours as a housekeeper in a hotel. They saved what they could, but we do not have enough savings to pay for my college education."

Step 3 Justify why you are seeking aid.

  • For example: “My earnings from my weekend job cover my living expenses. I worked extra shifts over the summer and saved enough to pay for a portion of this year’s tuition. However, I am seeking aid for the portion of the tuition I cannot cover on my own.”

Step 4 Describe how you would benefit from the financial aid.

  • For example: “Receiving financial aid will allow me to focus on my studies during the week without having to worry about earning extra money. I would continue to work on the weekends to cover my living expenses, but I would be able to keep the weekdays free to focus solely on my school work.”

Step 5 Write a closing statement.

  • For example: “Thank you for considering my application. I look forward to discussing my opportunities with you.”

Writing a Statement for a Scholarship

Step 1 Write an introduction.

  • For example: “I am applying for this scholarship in order to further my studies in education. My long-term goal is to work as an ESL teacher in an inner city environment. My academic, work and personal experiences have lead me to this career goal.”

Step 2 Describe your academic record.

  • For example: “I graduated from my undergraduate institution with a 4.0 GPA. I had a double major of Elementary Education and Spanish, with a minor in Sociology. I applied for and received a prestigious internship working with the state government on developing educational policies.”

Step 3 Communicate your leadership skills.

  • For example: “My parents moved our family to this country from Albania when I was 12 years old. I did not speak any English when we arrived. The ESL teachers in my school helped me to be successful in school, and I want to do the same for other students in my circumstances.”

Step 4 Explain your community service history.

  • For example: “Each summer, I volunteer for the Migrant Workers Education Association in Chester County, Pennsylvania. They service migrant workers who come here from Mexico to work on mushroom farms. We not only link families with community services, but we also tutor children in English and help them learn important school skills that will allow them to be successful in school.”

Step 5 Illustrate how your past experience has imparted qualities that the scholarship committee will value.

  • For example: “My experiences as an ESL student and an English tutor have taught me the value of helping children to feel successful and empowered. I know the meaning of hard work, and I have learned how to overcome challenges in my own personal and academic life.”

Step 6 Choose your words carefully.

Making Your Personal Statement Successful

Step 1 Start early.

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  • ↑ http://www.bestvalueschools.com/faq/what-is-a-statement-of-financial-need/
  • ↑ https://www.goingmerry.com/blog/how-to-write-a-scholarship-essay-or-statement-about-your-financial-need-with-examples/
  • ↑ https://www.laguardia.edu/uploadedfiles/main_site/content/supporters_friends/docs/scholarship_personal_statement.pdf
  • ↑ https://scholarships360.org/financial-aid/how-to-write-a-statement-of-financial-need/
  • ↑ https://custom-writing.org/blog/financial-needs-essay
  • ↑ http://financialaid.ucdavis.edu/scholarships/tips/personal.html

About This Article

Michael R. Lewis

If you’re writing a statement of financial need, make it personal by sharing information about yourself and what's motivating you to pursue your studies. Try to be authentic, to write honestly about what you've already accomplished and what you hope to do with your education. Use specific examples if you can to reinforce the points you're trying to make. Finally, be sure to start your first draft early enough to get feedback from teachers or advisers and make revisions before you submit it. For more advice from our reviewer, including how to write a statement for a scholarship, keep reading! Did this summary help you? Yes No

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personal statement for financial aid example

How to Write a Personal Statement for a Scholarship + Examples

What’s covered:, what is the purpose of the scholarship personal statement, what to include in your personal statement, personal statement example: breakdown + analysis, how to make sure your writing is effective.

Either before or after you’ve gotten into your dream school, you’ll have to figure out how to pay for it. For most students, this involves a combination of financial aid, parent contributions, self-contributions, student loans, and scholarships/grants. Because scholarships are money out of someone else’s pocket that you never have to pay back, they are a great place to start!

Scholarships come in two forms: merit-based and need-based. Need-based scholarships are also often called grants. These designations tell you whether an organization looks at your financial situation when deciding about your scholarship.

Additionally, different scholarships fall under different categories based on the mission of the organization or person providing the scholarship’s financing. These missions typically emphasize different things like academic achievement, specific career goals, community service, leadership, family background, skill in the arts, or having overcome hardship. As you select scholarships to apply for and complete your applications, you should keep these missions in mind.

No matter what type of scholarship you are applying for, you will be asked to provide the review committee with standard materials. This includes your transcript, GPA, and resume/extracurriculars, but also, importantly, your personal statement. A scholarship personal statement is a bit different from your normal college essay, so we’ve put together this guide and some examples to help you get started!

The purpose of your personal statement is to help a review committee learn more about your personality, values, goals, and what makes you special. Ultimately, like with your college essays, you are trying to humanize your profile beyond your transcript, GPA, and test scores.

College essays all have one goal in mind (which is why you can apply to multiple schools at once through applications like the Common App or Coalition App): convince admissions officers that you would be a valuable addition to the university environment. The goal of your scholarship personal statement is different and differs more from one scholarship to the next. Rather than convincing various review committees that you are a generally good candidate for extra funding for college, you need to convince each review committee that your values have historically aligned with their organization’s mission and will continue to align with their organization’s mission.

Common missions amongst those who give scholarships include:

  • Providing opportunities for students with career ambitions in a particular field
  • Helping students who have experienced unexpected hardship
  • Supporting students who show outstanding academic achievement
  • Funding the arts through investing in young artists with strong technical skill
  • Supporting the development of civic-minded community service leaders of the future
  • Providing opportunities for historically underrepresented ethnic communities 

If a specific mission like this is outlined on an organization’s website or in the promotional material for its scholarship, the purpose of your personal statement is to show how you exemplify that mission.

Some scholarships ask for your personal statement to be guided by a prompt, while others leave things open for interpretation. When you are provided a prompt, it is obvious what you must do: answer the prompt. When you are not provided a prompt, you want to write a personal statement that is essentially a small-scale autobiography where you position yourself as a good investment. In either case, you should identify a focus or theme for what you are trying to say about yourself so that your application does not get lost in the shuffle.

Prompts include questions like:

  • Why do you deserve this scholarship?
  • How have you shown your commitment to (leadership/community service/diversity) in your community?
  • When did you overcome adversity?
  • Why is attending college important to you?

If you are provided a prompt, develop a theme for your response that showcases both your values and your achievements. This will help your essay feel focused and will subsequently help the review committee to remember which candidate you were as they deliberate.

Themes include things like:

  • I deserve this community service scholarship because my compassion for intergenerational trauma has inspired me to volunteer with a local after-school program. I didn’t just sympathize. I did something about my sympathy because that’s the type of person I am. Within the program, I have identified avenues for improvement and worked alongside full-time staff to develop new strategies for increasing attendance.
  • I overcame adversity when my mother had to have a major surgery two months after giving birth to my younger brother. I was just a kid but was thrown into a situation where I had to raise another kid. It was hard, but I’m the kind of person who tries to grow from hard times and, through my experience taking care of a baby, I learned the importance of listening to body language and nonverbal cues to understand the needs of others (baby and nonbaby, alike).

Without a prompt, clarity can be harder to achieve. That said, it is of the utmost importance that you find a focus. First, think about both your goals and your values.

Types of goals include:

  • Career goals
  • Goals for personal growth
  • The type of friend you want to be
  • The change you want to make in the world

Values could include:

  • Authenticity
  • And many more!

After you write out your goals/values, write out your achievements to see what goals/values you have “proof” of your commitment to. Your essay will ultimately be an exploration of your goal/value, what you have done about your goal/value in the past, and what you aspire to in the future.

You might be tempted to reflect on areas for improvement, but scholarships care about you living out your values. It is not enough to aspire to be exemplary in leadership, community service, or your academic field. For scholarships, you have to already be exemplary.

Finally, keep in mind that the review committee likely already has a copy of your extracurricular activities and involvement. Pick one or two accomplishments, then strive for depth, not breadth as you explore them.

My interest in the field of neuroscience began at a young age.  When I was twelve years old, my sister developed a condition called Pseudotumor Cerebri following multiple concussions during a basketball game.  It took the doctors over six months to make a proper diagnosis, followed by three years of treatment before she recovered.  During this time, my love for neuroscience was sparked as I began to research her condition and, then, other neurocognitive conditions.  Later, my love of neuroscience was amplified when my mother began to suffer from brain-related health issues.  My mother had been a practicing attorney in Dallas for over twenty years.  She was a determined litigator who relentlessly tried difficult cases that changed people’s lives.  Now, she suffers from a cognitive impairment and is no longer able to practice law.  Oftentimes, she has headaches, she gets “cloudy,” her executive functioning slows down, she feels overwhelmed, and she forgets things.  My mother has gone from being the strong, confident, emotional and financial caretaker of our family to needing significant help on a daily basis. Once again, with this illness came a lot of research on my part — research that encouraged me to pursue my dreams of exploring neuroscience.

Due to my experiences with my mother and sister when I was in middle school, I knew that I wanted to make a difference in the field of neuroscience.  I also knew that, to obtain this goal, I needed to maintain superior grades in school while also pursuing opportunities outside of school to further my education.  In school, I was able to maintain superior grades to the point where I am currently valedictorian in a class of 567 students.  In addition, in school, I challenged myself by taking 16 Advanced Placement classes and 19 Honors classes.  Two of the most beneficial classes were AP Capstone Seminar and AP Capstone Research.  AP Capstone Seminar and AP Capstone Research are research-oriented classes where students are given the opportunity to pursue whatever track their research takes them down.  As a junior in AP Capstone Seminar, I researched the effects of harmful pesticide use on the prevalence of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) in children.  This year, as a senior in AP Capstone Research, I am learning about the effects of medical marijuana on the treatment of Multiple Sclerosis (MS).  

Outside of school, I furthered my education through taking advantage of the Duke TiP summer program. Duke TiP is a summer program run by Duke University where students who score extremely well on the SAT as middle schoolers are able to take college classes at different universities throughout the summers of their middle school and high school years.  I took advantage of this opportunity twice.  First, I went to Trinity University in San Antonio to expand my horizons and learn more about debate.  However, once I was done exploring, I decided I wanted to go into neuroscience.  This led me to take an Abnormal Psychology class at Duke University’s West Campus.  This class opened my eyes to the interaction between neuroscience and mental health, mental illness, and personality.  Years later, I am currently continuing my education outside of school as an intern at the University of Texas Dallas Center for Brain Health.  Through this internship, I have been able to see different aspects of neuroscience including brain pattern testing, virtual reality therapy, and longitudinal research studies.  With this background, I have positioned myself to be accepted by top neuroscience programs throughout the nation.  So far, I have been accepted to the neuroscience department of University of Southern California, the University of Virginia, the University of Texas, and Southern Methodist University, as well as the chemistry department at University of North Carolina–Chapel Hill.  

It is with this passion for neuroscience driven by my family and passion for education driven by internal motivation that I will set out to conquer my career objectives.  My educational aspirations consist of acquiring a bachelor’s degree in a biological or health science that would assist me in pursuing a medical career as a neuroscience researcher.  I decided to attain a career as a researcher since my passion has always been assisting others and trying to improve their quality of life.  After obtaining my Masters and my PhD, I plan to become a professor at a prestigious university and continue performing lab research on cognitive disorders.  I am particularly interested in disorders such as Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD).  In the lab, I hope to find different therapies and medications to help treat the 3.5 million people around the world suffering from ASD.  Furthermore, I want to contribute back to underserved populations that struggle because they do not have as much access to medical assistance as other privileged groups.  As such, I hope to do a part of my research in less developed or developing Spanish-speaking countries. This will also allow me to pursue my love of Spanish while pursuing my love of neuroscience.  I think that following such a career path will provide me the opportunity to learn about the medical needs of the autistic community and improve their quality of health.  Furthermore, I hope to train a new generation of students to strive to research and make comparable discoveries.  Whether it be through virtual reality labs or new drug discoveries, I believe that research leads to innovation which leads to a brighter future. 

This student does a great job of making themself appear competent and dedicated to the field of neuroscience. This is primarily because they provided tangible evidence of how they have pursued their dedication in the past—through their AP Capstone courses, their Abnormal Psychology class at Duke TiP, and their internship at UTD. There is no doubt in the mind of a reader that this student is high-achieving. 

This student also engages successfully with a past-future trajectory, where they end with a vision of how they will continue to use neuroscience in the future. This helps the review committee see what they are investing in and the ways that their money will go to good use.

This student has two major areas for improvement. As we have said, the purpose of a personal statement is for a student to humanize themself to a review committee. This student struggles to depict themself separately from their academic achievements. A solution to this would be for the student to establish a theme towards the beginning of their essay that relates to both their values as a human and their achievements.

At the beginning of the essay, the student explores how their interest in neuroscience began. They explain their interest through the following sentences: “During this time, my love for neuroscience was sparked as I began to research her condition and, then, other neurocognitive conditions” and “Once again, with this illness came a lot of research on my part — research that encouraged me to pursue my dreams of exploring neuroscience.” The student made the great decision to tell the backstory of their interest, but they described their research in very mundane and redundant terms. Instead, they could have focused on their value of intellectual curiosity as a magnetic force that encouraged them to research their mother and sister’s ailments. Curiosity, then, could serve as a value-related thematic throughline to taking AP Capstone classes, taking college courses during the summer that weren’t required, and interning before even graduating high school.

A second area for improvement would be avoiding statistics. As the student identifies their valedictorian status and the number of AP classes they have taken, they might turn away certain personalities on a review committee by appearing braggy. Even further, these statistics are a waste of space. The review committee already has access to this information. These words distract from the major theme of the essay and would have been better used to humanize the student.

Throughout my academic career, I have been an avid scholar, constantly pushing myself towards ambitious goals. I held and continue to hold myself to a high standard, enrolling myself in rigorous curriculum, including Honors and Advanced Placement courses to stretch my mental potential. During my junior year of high school, I took four AP tests, two on the same day, and earned the AP Scholar with Honor Award. Additionally, I received the Letter of Commendation for the PSAT/NMSQT, and qualified for Rotary Top 100 Students both my freshman and senior year, a sign of my commitment to my studies. However, school has not been all about having the best GPA for me; beyond the numbers, I have a deep drive to learn which motivates me to do well academically. I truly enjoy learning new things, whether it be a new essay style or a math theorem. I always give each class my best effort and try my hardest on every assignment. My teachers have noticed this as well, and I have received school Lancer Awards and Student of the Month recognitions as a result. It is a major goal of mine to continue to aspire towards a high level of achievement regarding future educational and occupational endeavors; I plan on continuing this level of dedication throughout my educational career and implementing the skills I have learned and will learn into my college experience and beyond.

This fall, I will begin attending the University of California Los Angeles as an English major. I chose this major because I am fascinated by written language, especially its ability to convey powerful messages and emotions. I also enjoy delving into the works of other authors to analyze specific components of their writing to discover the meaning behind their words. In particular, I cannot wait to begin in-depth literary criticism and learn new stylistic techniques to add more depth to my writing. Furthermore, I recently went to UCLA’s Bruin Day, an event for incoming freshmen, where I was exposed to many different extracurriculars, some of which really piqued my interest. I plan on joining the Writing Success Program, where I can help students receive free writing help, and Mock Trial, where I can debate issues with peers in front of a real judge. The latter, combined with a strong writing background from my undergraduate English studies will be extremely beneficial because I plan to apply to law school after my undergraduate degree. As of now, my career goal is to become a civil rights lawyer, to stand up for those who are discriminated against and protect minority groups to proliferate equality.

As a lawyer, I wish to utilize legislation to ameliorate the plight of the millions of Americans who feel prejudice and help them receive equity in the workplace, society, and so on. Though this seems a daunting task, I feel that my work ethic and past experience will give me the jumpstart I need to establish myself as a successful lawyer and give a voice to those who are often unheard in today’s legal system. I have been a Girl Scout for over a decade and continually participate in community service for the homeless, elderly, veterans, and more. My most recent project was the Gold Award, which I conducted in the Fullerton School District. I facilitated over ten workshops where junior high students taught elementary pupils STEM principles such as density and aerodynamics via creative activities like building aluminum boats and paper airplanes. I also work at Kumon, a tutoring center, where I teach students to advance their academic success. I love my job, and helping students from local schools reach their potential fills me with much pride.

Both being a Girl Scout and working at Kumon have inspired me to help those in need, contributing significantly to my desire to become a lawyer and aid others. My extracurriculars have allowed me to gain a new perspective on both learning and teaching, and have solidified my will to help the less fortunate. In college, I hope to continue to gain knowledge and further develop my leadership skills, amassing qualities that will help me assist others. I plan to join multiple community service clubs, such as UCLA’s local outreach programs that directly aid residents of Los Angeles. I want to help my fellow pupils as well, and plan on volunteering at peer tutoring and peer editing programs on campus. After college, during my career, I want to use legal tactics to assist the underdog and take a chance on those who are often overlooked for opportunities. I wish to represent those that are scared to seek out help or cannot afford it. Rather than battling conflict with additional conflict, I want to implement peaceful but strong, efficient tactics that will help make my state, country, and eventually the world more welcoming to people of all ethnic and socioeconomic backgrounds. These goals are close to my heart and therefore I will be as diligent as I am passionate about them. My perseverance and love for learning and community service drive my ambition in both education and life as a whole, and the drive to make the world a better place is one that I will carry with me for my entire life.

This student emphasizes two values in this essay: hard work and community service. These are values that go together nicely, and definitely make sense with this student’s end goal of becoming a civil rights lawyer! That said, some changes could be made to the way the student presents their values that would make their personal statement more convincing and engaging.

Structurally, instead of using a past-future trajectory, this student starts by explaining their academic achievements, then explains their career goals, then explains their history of community service, then explains their future desires for community service. This structure loses the reader. Instead, the student should have started with either the past or the future. 

This could look like 1) identifying their career goals, 2) explaining that hard work and a commitment to community service are necessary to get there, and 3) explaining that they aren’t worried because of their past commitment to hard work and community service. Or it could look like 1) providing examples of their hard work and community service in the past, then 2) explaining how those values will help them achieve their career goals.

Additionally, like with our other example, this student shows a heavy investment in statistics and spouting off accomplishments. This can be unappealing. Unfortunately, even when the student recognizes that they are doing this, writing “beyond the numbers, I have a deep drive to learn which motivates me to do well academically. I truly enjoy learning new things, whether it be a new essay style or a math theorem,” they continue on to cite their achievements, writing “My teachers have noticed this as well, and I have received school Lancer Awards and Student of the Month recognitions as a result.” They say they are going beyond the numbers, but they don’t go beyond the awards. They don’t look inward. One way to fix this would be to make community service the theme around which the essay operates, supplementing with statistics in ways that advance the image of the student as dedicated to community service.

Finally, this student would be more successful if they varied their sentence structure. While a small-scale autobiography can be good, if organized, every sentence should not begin with ‘I.’ The essay still needs to be engaging or the review committee might stop reading.

Feedback is ultimately any writer’s best source of improvement! To get your personal statement edited for free, use our Peer Review Essay Tool . With this tool, other students can tell you if your scholarship essay is effective and help you improve your essay so that you can have the best chances of gaining those extra funds!

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Financial Aid and Scholarships

Important updates.

  • The priority filing date for the 2024-25 FAFSA and CADAA has been extended to May 2, 2024 . Visit Apply for Financial Aid for details.
  • The Department of Education has announced they will send information from the 2024-25 FAFSA to schools in mid-March. This may result in a delay in financial aid packaging and offers for the 2024-25 academic year. While awaiting your financial aid offer, we encourage you to utilize the UC Davis Financial Aid Estimator  to estimate your potential aid.

Writing a Personal Statement

Perhaps the most critical piece of many scholarship applications is the personal statement. It is often the chance for you to make the best case for why you should be given a scholarship. Personal statements allow the reader of your application to gain the strongest feel for who you are as a person, what sets you apart from other applicants, provide evidence of your intellectual and creative achievements, and show your writing ability.

Your personal statement should be treated as the equivalent of a face-to-face interview. A well-written statement adds clarity, richness, and meaning to the information collected in other parts of your application. It is also an opportunity to explain how factors outside of your school environment have enhanced or impeded your ability to maximize available academic and intellectual opportunities.

While there is no one correct way to write a personal statement, here are some tips that are universally applicable:

Start on your personal statement early.

Give yourself time to think about your topics, and carefully consider the rationale behind each question.

Be clear. Be focused. Be organized.

Make sure your personal statement follows a logical structure. Try to think about how it may sound to an audience who doesn’t know you. Getting input from people you trust—teachers, friends, relatives—can help you get different perspectives on how your personal statement affects those who are reading it. Avoiding long, drawn-out essay responses will not only help keep your reader’s attention but will also show that you were thoughtful about your writing.

Get personal.

The readers want to get a sense of who you are, and the only way to do this is to share a bit about who you are.  After all, it is called a Personal Statement. This is your chance to share with the reader what you feel they should know about you to make an informed decision.

Make it authentic.

A personal statement should showcase who you are and what you care about, not what you believe the readers want to hear. Remember that those reading your application will be reading many other applications as well and will be able to tell right away if what you are writing is honest and authentic. It is also worth keeping in mind that some programs require an interview for finalists where it will be easy to spot those who have not been genuine in their personal statements.

Be careful with humor and clichés.

What might seem funny or bitingly ironic to you might not seem that way to someone who doesn’t know you. Remember that the personal statement is an opportunity for you to give a complete picture of yourself. Don’t allow clichés to speak for you.

Be reflective.

A personal statement isn’t effective simply because it chronicles difficult circumstances. Strong personal statements should show that the writer has reflected upon and learned from their past experiences and achievements. Ideally, the writer will be able to show progression towards a clear perspective of how he or she sees the world, and what direction he or she is headed towards in the future. An effective personal statement gives a clear sense of your personal qualities and how you have used and developed them in response to your opportunities and challenges.

Use specific examples to illustrate your ideas.

Being too vague or writing too generally will not make your personal statement memorable. Thousands upon thousands of personal statements discuss initiative, but only hundreds show initiative using concrete examples of demonstrated motivation and leadership. But examples are only one part of the equation. You also need to show how you have assigned meaning to your experiences and how you have grown from them. Prove that you have a sense of who you are, where you are going, and how you are going to use your education and your experiences to accomplish your goals. Although some events have long-term or even lifetime ramifications, it is usually better to focus on recent events because they shed more light on who you are right now.

Finally, give yourself plenty of time for revisions.

Personal statements should go through several drafts before submission. Read your writing to others, and revise for clarity in content and in style. Pay attention to rules of correct grammar and punctuation, and don’t forget to spell-check. It is also recommended that you make use of campus resources (such as professor, teaching assistant, advisor, Academic Assistance and Tutoring Center, classmates, or friends) to gain valuable insight into how to improve your personal statement. If you are applying for prestigious scholarships, make sure to submit all personal statements to the Prestigious Scholarship Advisor for editing and guidance on re-writes.

We hope these tips will help you get organized and will inspire you. Your personal statement is the best tool you have to show us the individual gifts you have to offer.

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Your chance of acceptance, your chancing factors, extracurriculars, personal statement for financial aid - where to start.

Hey y'all, I'm trying to apply for some financial aid, and I need to write a personal statement as part of the application process. Do you guys have any advice or tips on what to focus on in my statement? Thanks in advance!

Starting a personal statement for financial aid can be daunting, but here are a few helpful tips to guide your writing process:

1. Be genuine and sincere: Share your story honestly and authentically. Describe your background, your family's financial situation, and any specific hardships or obstacles you've faced. Being candid will allow the financial aid committee to better understand your circumstances and the reasons for your request.

2. Highlight your achievements: While the primary focus of your statement is on your financial need, it's essential to showcase your academic, extracurricular, and personal accomplishments. This will not only demonstrate your dedication and hard work but also help the committee see your potential and the impact of the financial aid on your future success.

3. Emphasize your educational and career goals: Describe how receiving financial aid would help you continue your educational journey and ultimately achieve your long-term goals. Be specific about your ambitions, whether they involve a particular line of study, research, or professional aspirations.

4. Explain how financial aid will make a difference: Discuss how the financial aid would impact not just your ability to continue your education, but also your overall well-being and the opportunities available to you. Providing specific examples will help illustrate the importance of financial assistance in your life.

5. Keep the tone professional: While it's crucial to be heartfelt, maintain a professional tone throughout your personal statement. Remember that you're asking for financial assistance, so be respectful, organized, and concise in your writing.

Here's a brief example to help you get started:

Growing up in a single-parent household has taught me the value of resilience and determination. My mother's tireless efforts to support our family while working two jobs have inspired me to pursue higher education and make the most of my opportunities. Despite her best efforts, affording college has been a challenge, and I am requesting financial aid to continue my studies.

Throughout high school, I maintained a strong GPA and participated in various extracurricular activities, including volunteering at a local food bank and tutoring younger students. Receiving financial aid would not only ease the burden on my family but also allow me to focus on my studies and continue to give back to my community.

My long-term goal is to earn a degree in engineering and later establish a sustainable community development organization. With financial aid assistance, I am confident that I can achieve my academic and professional ambitions and make a positive impact on the world around me.

In conclusion, I am grateful for your consideration of my financial need and appreciate the opportunity to share my story. Your support will make a significant difference not just in my education, but in my future and the lives of those I hope to serve.

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Financial Need Essay: Examples & Writing Guide

Unfortunately, not everyone striving for education can afford it. Some courses are so expensive that even well-to-do citizens need financial assistance. They can write a scholarship application letter or refuse the undertaking. In such a case, students are supposed to submit a financial need essay.

Our specialists will write a custom essay specially for you!

Funding authorities cannot assist each student. That is why you need to assure them in your statement of financial need that you deserve the scholarship more than anyone else. This article by Custom-Writing experts provides you with a clear structure. Besides, you will see an accurate statement of financial need essay sample.

In a financial need essay, you should: introduce yourself, explain how you're now paying for college, justify your need, explain your potential benefits, and make a closing statement.

  • ✅ What to Include
  • 🚫 Mistakes to Avoid
  • 👀 Essay Sample

🔗 References

✅ statement of financial need: what to include.

This type of writing is a statement of a student’s life circumstances . But there is a limited number of aspects that you need to include. Otherwise, the committee will reject your request for financial aid as it will not look persuasive enough. Follow the next five steps to write a scholarship-winning essay. If you will still be unsure of how to write this kind of paper, explore the example in the next section.

  • Introduce yourself. Your readers learn about you for the first time. It is polite to tell them who you are . Stress that you are the first person in your family who will attend a college. If you pertain to an ethnic group that may be underrepresented at the college, mention it.
  • Explain how you’re now paying for college. Are you working to pay for your studies? Does this work take the time you could spend learning?
  • Justify your financial need. Explain why you need assistance and the difficulties you meet in paying for your studies.
  • Describe how you would benefit from the scholarship. Will you have to drop out if you are not given the scholarship? What will happen when you receive it? Explain that you will be able to study more if there is no need to work after classes.
  • Make a closing statement . Do not beg and avoid being too emotional. Your essay should sound professional. Thank your readers for taking the time to consider your request.

Here, you can read about other secrets of scholarship essay writing .

🚫 Financial Need Essay: Mistakes to Avoid

There are several big mistakes that students can make in their scholarship essays.

👀 Statement of Financial Need: Essay Sample

We hope that this short, but comprehensive guide will get your essay going! Good luck and be sure to check out our blog for more writing tips.

Just in 1 hour! We will write you a plagiarism-free paper in hardly more than 1 hour

✏️ Financial Need Essay FAQ

There is no universal way to justify why you need money. Every situation is unique. Every person might have their life circumstances. Typically, students apply for scholarships because they can’t work full-time yet. Thus, they cannot afford the desired program.

Two key strategies to ask for scholarship money are those below.

1. Write an impressive motivation letter mentioning your tight budget,

2. Write an application letter describing your tough life circumstances (especially if you have incomplete family, etc.).

For additional details, check examples of such papers online and in books.

Applying for a scholarship implies proving why you deserve this assistance. Demonstrate your strong motivation, your real passion for learning, describe your educational background. If you want to be chosen for the program, take a look at examples and templates available online. You need to highlight your strengths and motivation .

It’s probably a bad idea to begin with the statement of financial need itself. Instead, demonstrate your strong motivation and even passion first. Briefly describe your background and highlight relevant educational and work experience. Acknowledge that financial assistance would help you to develop further.

  • Writing a Winning College Scholarship Essay | The Princeton Review
  • 5 Ways to Make Your Scholarship Essay Stand Out – U.S. News
  • How to Write a Scholarship Essay – Maryville University Online
  • How Aid Is Calculated | Federal Student Aid
  • Definition of need | Student Financial Aid | University of Missouri
  • How need is determined | Student Financial Aid (UWashington)
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Thank you for the financial need essay writing tips you have posted. They are very helpful! I’ll return to this blog for more useful guidelines for writing papers!

Ha, fully posting! How to ask for money? Yeah, it is a great idea to write a financial need essay in a humorous manner.

Scholarship Essays

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Statement of Financial Need Scholarship Essay Example

Tell us about your need for this scholarship.

The value of education is something that I have understood since a very young age. Neither of my parents had an opportunity to attend college, and faced many struggles in their personal and professional lives because of this. They made a commitment early in my life to do everything within their power to instill in me a love of learning and an understanding of the importance of hard work and dedication.

Because of their love and sacrifice over the years, I have been able to devote the time and energy necessary to academic accomplishment even though money has always been tight. In my senior year at XYZ High School, I have a 3.9 grade-point average and have been named Salutatorian of my graduating class. In addition to focusing on my own studies, I also worked as a math and science tutor throughout my years in high school as a way of contributing to my family's budget.

Additionally, I have also been active in my school and community outside of the classroom, serving on the student council as Secretary Treasurer for two years, serving as an officer in the Future Engineers of America chapter at my school, and volunteering at a local Boys & Girls Clubs of America chapter during school breaks.

My family has made many sacrifices to allow me to focus on education throughout primary and secondary school. I now have an opportunity to become the first person in my family to attend college, though I'm in need of financial assistance to realize what has been a long-term goal for me and a dream for my parents.

If selected for this scholarship, I will continue to apply the same diligence to my collegiate studies as I have to this point, making education and service to others my top priority. I will represent your organization well during my years in college and beyond. Thank you in advance for your consideration.

Original Source: College.Lovetoknow

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How to Write a SAP Appeal Letter (With an Example)

personal statement for financial aid example

Gabriel Jimenez-Ekman is a content editor and writer at Scholarships360. He has managed communications and written content for a diverse array of organizations, including a farmer’s market, a concert venue, a student farm, an environmental NGO, and a PR agency. Gabriel graduated from Kenyon College with a degree in sociology.

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personal statement for financial aid example

Caitlyn Cole is a college access professional with a decade of experience in non-profit program and project management for college readiness and access organizations.

personal statement for financial aid example

Maria Geiger is Director of Content at Scholarships360. She is a former online educational technology instructor and adjunct writing instructor. In addition to education reform, Maria’s interests include viewpoint diversity, blended/flipped learning, digital communication, and integrating media/web tools into the curriculum to better facilitate student engagement. Maria earned both a B.A. and an M.A. in English Literature from Monmouth University, an M. Ed. in Education from Monmouth University, and a Virtual Online Teaching Certificate (VOLT) from the University of Pennsylvania.

How to Write a SAP Appeal Letter (With an Example)

If your college suspends your financial aid, it’s important to learn how to write an effective SAP appeal letter. In this article we’ll answer some of your common questions concerning this topic and include an example of what your letter should look like!

What is a SAP appeal letter? 

SAP, or Satisfactory Academic Progress, is a set of criteria that a student must meet to continue receiving financial aid. These criteria include grades, credit enrollment, and progress towards a degree. If a student does not meet the standards, the school may suspend their aid and place the student on academic probation . 

Luckily, schools have a system in place to account for students with extenuating circumstances. If a student faced extracurricular difficulties that prevented them from making SAP, they may be able to keep their aid. Students must write a SAP appeal letter to appeal to continue receiving aid. 

Related: All about Satisfactory Academic Progress and how to appeal

Where to file your SAP appeal letter

First things first — you should learn who you’ll file your SAP letter with. You’ll typically be dealing with your student financial services office. It will probably be the same people who contacted you to warn you about your upcoming aid suspension.

Some schools may have length or formatting requirements for SAP appeals. In some cases, you’ll be responding to prompts on a form rather than writing a letter. So before you begin writing, learn if there are any restrictions or guidelines set by your school. 

Also see: How does withdrawing from a class affect financial aid?

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$10,000 “No Essay” Scholarship

$10,000 “No Essay” Scholarship

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What circumstances justify an sap appeal.

Only students with approved circumstances can have their financial aid reinstated after failing to make SAP. Each school has a different set of standards, and ultimately it is up to the committee that reads your letter. However, the general set of circumstances that justify an SAP appeal are:

  • Serious health problems that inhibited their ability to complete coursework
  • Serious illness or injury in the student’s immediate family
  • A death in the student’s family
  • Struggles with mental illness
  • Domestic issues in the student’s home or in their immediate family

Related: How many credit hours do you need for financial aid?

What is the goal of my letter?

The principal goal of your letter is to convince your reader that your lapse in performance was due to one of the reasons listed above. 

Explain your situation

Walk your reader through your situation, and explain how it affected your performance. Make sure to emphasize how your circumstance falls into one of the above categories.

Show the steps you’ve taken and what you have learned

Show that you have been proactive in correcting the situation. If you reached out to professors during the semester to communicate your issues, mention those correspondences. Point out your mistakes during the last semester and how you learned from them.

Outline your plan 

After you discuss some of the steps you’ve already taken, your goal is to outline your plan to improve. Emphasize that the situation is over or that there is an end in sight. Outline a plan to prevent the same lapse in performance from happening again. Even if you cannot prevent the extenuating circumstances, show that you will be able to balance them more effectively.

Also see:  Do I have to pay back scholarships if I drop out of college?

Should I include any other materials in my SAP appeal letter?

If you have official documentation that helps prove your story, you should enclose it with your letter. The list below is not exhaustive, but does contain many of the main documents you may want to include. 

  • Notes from your doctor or psychologist
  • Police reports
  • Notes from a professors
  • Eviction notices  

Additionally, if you reached out for help from school officials during the semester, you can include those correspondences. Just make sure to obtain permission from the participants before including them.

What tone should I use?

When you write your letter, try to be clear and concise. Even though you will likely be discussing personal matters, try to remain professional. Discuss what happened in a straightforward matter. Although you should be honest about how the circumstance affected you, you shouldn’t sidetrack your argument by discussing emotions.

Also read: How to email your professor

Example SAP Letter

Dear Dr. Smith and Esteemed Committee Members, My name is Leon Melville and I am writing to appeal the suspension of my financial aid package. I failed to make academic satisfactory progress this semester, primarily due to my poor performance in Calculus II and Statistics. I take full responsibility for the decline in my academic performance this semester. However, I am confident in my ability to meet the College’s academic standards in the future. I was impacted by extenuating circumstances this semester that impacted my ability to keep up with my studies. I broke my leg halfway through the semester, which resulted in my missing class for two weeks. When I returned to school, I had fallen behind in my courses. Additionally, I was forced to attend physical therapy four times per week. I have enclosed a note from my doctor and my physical therapist that confirm these events. Before my accident, I had been attending tutoring hours for my statistics and calculus classes. These are subjects that I have always required extra help in. However, once I began physical therapy, I was no longer able to attend these sessions. As a result of my two weeks out of class and my lack of tutoring, I fell behind in class. I’ve included notes from my mathematics tutors to confirm my attendance at the beginning of the semester. I take full responsibility for my poor performance this semester. I’ve learned that I need to be more proactive and communicate with my professors more if I fall behind. I’ve also learned how important those tutoring sessions are to my performance. I will be sure to attend them in future semesters. My leg has now healed fully and I do not anticipate any future physical therapy next semester. I believe that I have the tools to succeed in the future. However, I need my financial aid package in order to continue my studies. Without the Pell Grant and my institutional aid, I will be unable to enroll next semester. Thank you for your time and consideration.  Sincerely, Leon Melville
  • If you are reading this before your aid has been suspended, reach out to your professors now! Even if you won’t make SAP this semester, you should establish a paper trail that you have sought help from. This will make your SAP appeal letter more effective
  • If you have already received notice that your aid is being suspended, take your first steps towards writing your letter. Reach out to the office that suspended your aid and ask about their guidelines for an appeal letter
  • Once you write your letter, don’t forget to proofread. Ask a friend or family member to proofread the letter to make sure it is clear and concise

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Frequently asked questions about writing a SAP letter

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Office of Financial Aid and Scholarships

Personal Statement

When applying for scholarships at Fresno State, you will be asked to submit a personal statement. Your personal statement is a very important part of your application for scholarships and should be given special time and attention.

Why is a personal statement important?

The purpose of the personal statement is to give you an opportunity to tell us important things about yourself that are not addressed or apparent in the application. In making decisions about scholarships, we want to consider your personal attributes and gain some sense of who you are; your experiences, accomplishments, and a variety of qualities such as motivation, self-discipline, leadership, commitment to others, your intended field of study and your career goals as well as your academic record. 

Each year, Fresno State receives applications from many more students than we can award, and the academic records of these students are usually very similar. In order to discover and evaluate the distinctions among these applicants, scholarship selection committees look closely at an individual's entire application. The academic record, information about accomplishments and activities, and personal statements help us gain insight into a student's level of achievement and character. Taken together, these factors enable us to weigh what we can offer the applicant. In some cases, the personal statement can be a critical factor in the selection process. 

Mechanics of writing the personal statement

Carefully read the instructions and/or questions on the application. A common mistake applicants make is to skim through the instructions contained in the application. Take time to read and understand all the instructions so your application is a true and complete reflection of you. 

Remember that your application will be compared to other qualified students, many of whom have shared similar experiences or academic achievements.  Your personal statement needs to clearly convey what you think is important for us to know about you. In reading your statement, we look for personal characteristics that include creativity, intellectual curiosity and achievement, personal initiative, motivation, leadership, persistence, exceptional recognition and rare talent, the ability to overcome hardship and get along with others, and service to others. In any case, your statement should clearly convey what you think is important for us to know about you and convey a sense of a full human being behind the GPA and test scores. If you are applying to a specific major, you should discuss your interest in your intended field of study.

We expect you to write the personal statement yourself; write in your own voice. At the same time, it is probably wise to have a friend, teacher, or parent read the statement to advise you on how well it conveys what you want it to say, and if it reflects who you really are. Remember: the purpose of the personal statement is to help selection committees know you on a personal level.

What the personal statement is not

It should not be a chronicle of events or an autobiography. The statement is about you, not about events. What is important is what you have learned, or changed, or how your sense of direction was solidified, or how your image of yourself and others has changed, and so on.  Also, please do not use bullet format or résumé style outline for your narrative statements.

What should I discuss if I'm a transfer student or a student returning to college after a long absence?

In addition to suggestions cited above, you should discuss your interest in your intended major, describing any related work or volunteer experience and explaining the way your interest in the field developed. In general, your statement should focus on relatively recent activities and experiences, although scholarship selection committees are  interested in any special circumstances that may have had a significant impact on you earlier in life. You should define your motivation, achievement, leadership, and commitment.

  • Last Updated Aug 29, 2022
  • How to Write the Perfect Financial Aid Suspension Appeal Letter (and a Sample)
  • Financial Aid

Your financial aid can be suspended while you attend school for several reasons: You switch schools or change majors; your family makes too much money, which changes the information on your Free Application for Federal Student Aid (FAFSA); or you do not make satisfactory academic progress (SAP) as determined by your school.

If your school suspends your financial aid, and private student loans are not an option, it makes sense to worry about completing your degree. Depending on the reasons your aid was suspended , you can likely file an appeal.

If you do not meet the minimum course or hour requirements, you may lose financial aid with no ability to appeal. However, if you have personal reasons for struggling academically during the school year, you can file an appeal.

As part of your financial aid suspension appeal, include a letter explaining what happened. This letter can help the committee determine whether to reinstate this help.

  • How to Understand the Appeals Process During Financial Aid Suspension

personal statement for financial aid example

Filing a financial aid suspension appeal starts when you go to your school’s student financial services office. Ask them about the appeals process and what forms you need. Be diligent about gathering correct information and file your appeal by the deadline. Schools generally only allow you to file an appeal when your financial aid is suspended due to an SAP problem. To have financial aid reinstated, you must: 

  • Understand your school’s SAP auditing process and the specific causes for your financial aid’s suspension.
  • Show that you have corrected the SAP problem.
  • Submit the appeal.
  • Have your appeal accepted by the SAP committee.

When your appeal is accepted, you will be placed on financial aid probation. This provides you another semester, trimester, or quarter of financial aid. The committee will then reconvene to determine whether you addressed your SAP problem in a satisfactory way. A successful SAP appeal will include information about why your academic status changed, you dropped courses or failed to sign up for enough courses, or otherwise did not meet your school’s standards. There are many reasons students struggle, but some common causes include:

  • Personal struggles with physical or mental health
  • Family struggles, including illness or death
  • Financial catastrophe, making your living situation unstable

As you complete your SAP appeal , gather information like health records, financial records, family statements, and correspondence with professors, employers, and peers that may be relevant. You should also write a personal letter to the SAP committee, which acknowledges that you did not meet SAP standards, that you understand what happened, and that you will take steps to correct this problem. Components of a successful SAP appeal letter are : 

  • Formal heading, including your name, student identification, the date, and the committee’s information
  • Formal address, including names of committee members you have corresponded with
  • Introductory and concluding paragraphs
  • One or two paragraphs explaining events that caused your academic struggles
  • Information in these middle paragraphs about how you will improve your performance in the coming semester, trimester, quarter, or year
  • Formal signoff
  • Information about relevant attachments, like doctors’ notes or personal statements from family members

You may also be required to create a plan, in a separate document, to improve your academic performance. If you have a good academic record from previous years, you can show that this is a temporary problem and you understand how to solve it. If you are a newer student, you may need to provide references from other school years or classes that show you are able to improve your performance.

personal statement for financial aid example

  • Financial Aid Suspension Appeal Letter Sample

To understand how all the components of a financial aid suspension appeal letter work together, here is a sample: Dear Dr. Smythe and Esteemed Members of the Committee, My name is Joan Doe, and I am writing this letter as part of my appeal to reinstate my financial aid. Because I struggled to complete classes during this past semester, it was determined that I did not make satisfactory academic progress per the institution’s guidelines. Consequently, my financial aid was revoked. While I respect the school’s decision regarding my grades, I need this financial support to continue completing my bachelor’s degree. My poor academic progress occurred because of struggles within my family this year. My father was diagnosed with colorectal cancer. While his prognosis is good and we now know that treatment is going well, it was a devastating emotional blow. I spent more time with my family, helping to take care of the household and my two younger siblings while my mother was with my father during his treatment. This included a hospital stay of about one week, during which time I was unable to return to class. I worked hard on my studies during this time, but because my time was much more limited, I was unable to focus on writing papers, studying for midterms and finals, and meeting some deadlines. My professors, including my adviser Dr. Smythe, have been as understanding as possible. I did not communicate as clearly as I should have, and I understand that my negligence has translated into lower grades. I even failed some courses, which is a first for me, if you look at my previous years at this college. I regret such poor performance, and I want to improve in the coming academic year. The school has accepted me as a student again for the upcoming semester, but without the financial aid provided through the Pell Grant and student loan programs, I cannot afford to attend. My academic record prior to this has been exceptional, and I believe I can return to this level of scholastic performance. Please consider reinstating my financial aid with my regret, my apologies, and my history as a good student in mind. Thank you for your consideration. I appreciate attending this school and look forward to graduation. Respectfully, Joan Doe

  • Other Sources of Funding if Your Financial Aid Is Suspended

The SAP committee may not accept your appeal or your financial aid suspension could stem from other causes, like changing majors and no longer meeting scholarship requirements. Other sources of financial aid, like private student loans, can help you complete your semester or year if you are unable to get your financial aid reinstated.

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Finance Personal Statement Examples

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COMMENTS

  1. How to write a financial need scholarship essay (with examples!)

    What to include in a financial need scholarship essay. Usually this statement of financial need is a pretty short scholarship essay (150-300 words), so unlike a college essay or personal statement where you have ample word count to tell anecdotes, you'll likely need to get right to the point.. Be sure to include:

  2. Personal statement for financial aid: what are some good examples

    Hi! Writing a personal statement for a financial aid application can be challenging, but it's a great opportunity to share your story and explain your financial circumstances. Here are some general tips and examples to help you get started: 1. Start by providing an introduction that outlines your personal background and family situation. You can mention any specific hardships your family has ...

  3. Financial Need Scholarship Essay Examples (2023)

    Example 2: "Describe your financial need in 100 words". This essay is even shorter than the financial need statement. It may be one of several short answer questions you need to fill out. Working with 100 words is tricky. That only leaves room for about 7-10 sentences, depending on length.

  4. 4 Ways to Write a Financial Aid Statement

    3. Justify why you are seeking aid. Explain the difficulties you are having meeting your needs. Describe changes in your life that have affected your ability to pay for college. For example, changes in your family's income or unexpected expenses may have caused a financial deficit.

  5. How to Write a Statement of Financial Need

    Generally, the statement of financial need will go beyond what is captured by the FAFSA or CSS profile. In this article, we will provide a step-by-step guide to show you how to write a statement of financial need. Apply to these scholarships due soon. $10,000 "No Essay" Scholarship. 1 award worth $10,000.

  6. How to Write a Personal Statement for a Scholarship + Examples

    That said, it is of the utmost importance that you find a focus. First, think about both your goals and your values. Types of goals include: Career goals. Goals for personal growth. The type of friend you want to be. The change you want to make in the world. Values could include: Authenticity.

  7. 14 Scholarship Essay Examples That Won Thousands 2023

    Concepts like financial aid, grants, loans, are all foreign concepts as most of our parents never went to college. ... 12 Outstanding Personal Statement Examples + Analysis for Why They Worked. 10+ Outstanding Common App Essay Examples. 17 UC Essay Examples (AKA Personal Insight Questions) How to Write a College Essay Step-by-Step: The Ultimate ...

  8. Financial aid personal statement examples?

    A personal statement for financial aid should focus on your financial situation, any challenges or extenuating circumstances you face, and how receiving aid will impact your education and future aspirations. Here's a brief outline and example to help guide you: 1. Introduction: Start by introducing yourself and providing a brief overview of ...

  9. How to Write an Amazing Personal Statement (Includes Examples!)

    5. Use an authentic voice. Your personal statement reflects who you are, so you should use a tone that represents you. That means you shouldn't try to sound like someone else, and you shouldn't use fancy words just to show off. This isn't an academic paper, so you don't have to adopt a super formal tone.

  10. Financial Aid and Scholarships

    Perhaps the most critical piece of many scholarship applications is the personal statement. It is often the chance for you to make the best case for why you should be given a scholarship. ... This will result in a delay in financial aid packaging and offers for the 2024-25 academic year. Writing a Personal Statement. ... Use specific examples ...

  11. Personal statement for financial aid

    Providing specific examples will help illustrate the importance of financial assistance in your life. 5. Keep the tone professional: While it's crucial to be heartfelt, maintain a professional tone throughout your personal statement. Remember that you're asking for financial assistance, so be respectful, organized, and concise in your writing.

  12. 12 Outstanding Personal Statement Examples + Why They Work 2024

    Example #3 - 12. Example #4 - Flying. Example #5 - Arab Spring in Bahrain. Example #6 - Poop, Animals and the Environment. Example #7 - Entoptic Phenomena. Example #8 - The Builder & Problem Solver. Example #10 - The Little Porch and a Dog (With Spanish Translation) Example #10 - Life As an Undocumented Student.

  13. Financial Need Essay: Examples & Writing Guide

    1. Write an impressive motivation letter mentioning your tight budget, 2. Write an application letter describing your tough life circumstances (especially if you have incomplete family, etc.). For additional details, check examples of such papers online and in books.

  14. Statement of Financial Need Scholarship Essay Example

    Tell Us About Your Need For This Scholarship. Financial Need Essay. The value of education is something that I have understood since a very young age. Neither of my parents had an opportunity to attend college, and faced many struggles in their personal and professional lives because of this. They made a commitment early in my life to do ...

  15. PDF Writing a Successful SAP Appeal- EXAMPLES

    Supporting statement from professor Fourth SAP Appeal Example First Paragraph: Describe what happened that prevented you from meeting SAP. Writing a Successful SAP Appeal- EXAMPLES During the spring term, my grandmother's health declined due to various health problems accompanied with her elderly age. I come from a single-mother household and ...

  16. PDF How to Write a Personal Statement

    How you write your personal statement is completely up to you, and you can be as creative as you like. A traditional personal statement will have an introductory paragraph where you can introduce yourself to the reader or say some key points about yourself. Some personal statements start with a clear statement or catchy line to try to catch the ...

  17. How to Write a Financial Aid Appeal Letter

    For families who determine an appeal is the best route, here are tips on how to write a successful financial aid appeal letter: Start by calling the financial aid office. Include specific examples ...

  18. How to Write a Personal Statement

    Insert a quote from a well-known person. Challenge the reader with a common misconception. Use an anecdote, which is a short story that can be true or imaginary. Credibility is crucial when writing a personal statement as part of your college application process. If you choose a statistic, quote, or misconception for your hook, make sure it ...

  19. How to Write a Financial Aid Appeal Letter

    Begin with who you are and where you are from, how grateful you are to have been accepted and that you are excited about the school. Be direct about what the letter is for (financial aid) Briefly talk about why the school is a great fit for you and why you need the money in a straightforward and respectful way.

  20. How to Write a SAP Appeal Letter (With an Example)

    First things first — you should learn who you'll file your SAP letter with. You'll typically be dealing with your student financial services office. It will probably be the same people who contacted you to warn you about your upcoming aid suspension. Some schools may have length or formatting requirements for SAP appeals.

  21. Personal Statement

    Personal Statement. When applying for scholarships at Fresno State, you will be asked to submit a personal statement. Your personal statement is a very important part of your application for scholarships and should be given special time and attention. ... Financial Aid. 5150 North Maple Avenue M/S JA64 Fresno, CA 93740; P 559.278.2182 ...

  22. How to Write the Perfect Financial Aid Suspension Appeal Letter (and a

    Information about relevant attachments, like doctors' notes or personal statements from family members; You may also be required to create a plan, in a separate document, to improve your academic performance. ... Financial Aid Suspension Appeal Letter Sample. To understand how all the components of a financial aid suspension appeal letter ...

  23. Finance Personal Statement Examples

    Economics and Finance Personal Statement Example 1. The crucial importance and relevance of economics related disciplines to the modern world have led me to want to pursue the study of these social sciences at a higher level. My experiences of A-Level Economics has shown me the fundamental part it plays in our lives and I would like to approach ...

  24. Notes to the Financial Statements: Free PDF Example and Template

    Financial statement notes are narrative and supporting schedules that accompany the financial statements. Their primary purpose is to provide: Clarity on the methods used in preparing the financial statements. Explanations of the underlying policies that guide these methods. Additional details about the specific line items in the formal ...