how to write a good groom wedding speech

This website uses cookies to ensure you get the best experience on our website

  • Anniversary Gifts
  • Stag and Hen
  • Wedding DIY
  • Wedding Dresses
  • Wedding Planning
  • Wedding Songs
  • Wedding Speeches
  • Wedding Venues
  • Date Checker
  • Advertise with us
  • Industry Blog
  • Submit a wedding
  • Giving back
  • Supplier Log in
  • Your Inspiration

How to Write The Perfect Groom’s Speech (With Examples)

Author: Hollie Bond

NB: To help you browse our best suggestions we have included some third party links. Some purchases made through these links may earn us a commission to help keep our blogs and offers current and up to date. Thanks for your support!

How to Write a Grooms Speech

Funny groom's speech ideas, emotional groom's speech ideas, unusual groom's speech ideas, famous groom's speech ideas.

No idea where to start when it comes to making a speech on your big day? We’ve compiled all the best tips and inspiration to help you write and deliver the best groom’s speech ever.

The groom’s speech is always a highlight at a wedding. It’s a chance for guests to hear all the romantic and heartfelt sentiments that you, as a newlywed, will be experiencing.

It’s also a feel-good part of the day where you get to acknowledge all your guests and thank individuals who have helped you bring this special day together. Everyone in the ‘audience’ will be friends and family, so put any public speaking nerves aside, as everyone will be willing you on to do your best and if you stumble over your words or well up when you’re talking about your new wife or husband – well, they’ll just love you even more!

We’ve rounded up 40 of the best groom’s speech ideas, with inspiration for funny, emotional, and unusual speeches, plus examples from famous grooms, to help you write your own Oscar-worthy speech.

What should the groom say in his speech?

Good news! The groom’s speech is one of the easiest speeches to write and deliver as it is essentially just one big thank you.

A groom’s speech should focus on thanking everyone who has helped make the wedding day special including the mother and father of the bride (or equivalent), the guests, his own parents, the best man, the bridesmaids, ushers, and anyone else who has contributed to the wedding.

The other main focus of the groom’s speech is to lavish praise and compliments on his new wife (or groom) and to tell them how happy he is to be married. Finally, the groom should raise a toast to his new wife or husband.

How long should a groom’s speech be?

Any speech at a wedding, including the groom’s speech, should be no longer than ten minutes. When written down this is approximately 1500 words, but make sure to time yourself before the big day in case you’re a particularly slow or fast speaker.

Ten minutes is the ideal length to get across everything you need to say, but not so long that your guests get bored and start to fidget. If you’re not a confident speaker you can always just say a few lines lasting a couple of minutes.

Less is definitely more when it comes to speeches. That said, if it’s too short you could sound flippant! Anywhere between five and ten minutes and you’re in safe territory.

1. Don’t be too formal

Unless you’re known for your love of a bit of pomp and circumstance then you don’t suddenly have to become the master of all things etiquette and stuffy speech-making just because it’s your wedding day. Your guests will want to hear you speak in your usual way, and as long as you cover the expected formalities like thanking everyone for coming, both sets of parents, the bridal party, and anyone who went above and beyond to help you with something like making a cake, then you don’t have to worry about anything else.

2. Focus on the start

If you can get guests smiling from the very beginning of the speech, then both you and your guests will feel relaxed and enjoy the rest of it. Have a think about something humorous that specifically relates to your guests or wedding situation rather than an obvious/ heard-100-times-before gag. Perhaps you’re known for your non-stop chatter, so you could open with “I know you’re all thinking you should take a loo break before I start talking, but I promise I’ll keep this as short (as I can!)…”

3. Don’t forget the main purpose of the speech

A romantic and heartfelt ode to the person you’ve just married should be the main focus of this speech. Try to avoid just saying empty words that anyone could say like “she/he is wonderful, beautiful, kind” etc. Think of specific things that your other half has done that makes you proud/ really love them/ that makes them unique. Anecdotes and stories that highlight a personal trait are the best way to do this.

4. Be romantic, not cheesy

Try not to fall into the trap of sounding like a compilation of all the lines you might find inside a cheesy Valentine’s Day card. Instead of “I’m so lucky to have found you” think about “My parents always told me nothing good would come of always being late, but I’m so glad to say I proved them wrong. I missed my train (as usual) that fateful day and the best thing ever came out of it… you.” Or a simple list of all the things that you particularly love about your partner, from the way they constantly fiddle with their hair to the way they talk to your dog like it’s a human.

5. Don’t give out gifts

This isn’t prize-giving at school and giving out weddinggifts to bridesmaids and ushers etc. will just take up valuable partying time. Give your bridal party their gifts in the morning when you’re all getting ready as it’ll be more personal in private.

6. Think about timing

A speech around the 7 – 10 minutes mark is considered the perfect amount of time for a groom’s speech (written down that’s about 1200 – 1400 words). Any less and you’ll sound a bit flippant. Any more and guests will start getting bored.

7. Don’t go into massive amounts of detail

We all know someone that tells a story as intricate and descriptive as a Tolstoy novel and how we automatically glaze over as soon as they start speaking. Don’t be that person. Your guests don’t want War and Peace – they want a nice easy to listen to a speech that doesn’t mentally challenge them, especially once they’re a few drinks down.

8. Find the perfect quote

If you’re not a wordsmith, let someone else more qualified sum up your feelings for you. There are plenty of amazing quotes from authors and famous orators out there and one or two of them may be exactly what you need to succinctly put all your feelings about the day and your partner into one neat sentence. Just make sure to acknowledge the original author!

9. Give your partner a promise

A lovely way to be funny and also heartfelt at the same time is to make a promise or two to your partner in front of your guests. Don’t just repeat your vows here, promise something that is unique to her/him. Perhaps she’s an avid rock climber and you’re more of a couch potato? Promise you’ll learn to love her crazy hobby. Maybe you’re not exactly Heston Blumenthal in the kitchen? Promise you’ll learn to cook your partner more than beans on burnt toast. Perhaps she/he is the world’s greatest Swiftie. Promise you’ll learn the lyrics to all their favourite Taylor Swift songs… you get the idea.

10. Prepare the delivery

The biggest mistake you can make is to write a great speech on paper and then not read it out loud before the big day. You need to practice talking slowly and confidently and leaving little pauses after funny bits (for any of the slower guests to get it!). Also, some written sentences don’t sound great when spoken, so reading out loud will help you to iron out any clunky syntax. Plus, you’ll want to know the speech almost by heart so that you don’t have your head in a piece of paper reading word-for-word on the day. Eye contact with your guests is one of the most important parts of delivering a successful speech.

You don’t have to be the next Michael McIntyre, but giving your guests a giggle and making them smile is the quickest way to make both them and you feel at ease with the speech.

Don’t fall into the trap of thinking you have to pepper your speech with gags and silly one-liners to make it funny. Instead, just focus on things that are unique to you as a couple or for the audience (perhaps the region you’re from for example) and have a bit of fun at your/ their expense. Be careful not to reference something that only a few members of the audience will understand as that will very quickly alienate your other guests.

Here are ten funny speech ideas to take inspiration from:

Focus on your differences

Comparing your differences can be an easy way to make the guests smile. Are you obsessively tidy and your new partner a bit of a slob perhaps? Can you cook like a pro while they can’t even heat soup without burning the place down? Whatever your differences, exaggerate them and make a joke out of them to get guests giggling.

Tell the crowd something they don’t know

Do you know some funny things about your bride/groom’s past that others in the audience might not? Now’s a good time to reveal that she/he did some hilarious hobbies or geeky things as a child. Perhaps they have a funny secret crush or can do a really odd trick.

Exaggerate your weaknesses

Putting yourself down and acknowledging something everyone knows about you can be a good way to make guests smile. E.g. “Would you believe it? The bride/ groom has finally given up holding out for Ryan Gosling and decided a bald, beer-swilling Insurance Broker from Newcastle is a better option instead.”

Here’s a good example of a funny, self-deprecating groom’s speech:

Make a joke about the wedding itself

“Before I begin, please can we ensure that all the aisles and fire exits are kept clear throughout the reception. There’s a medical team waiting outside the building and I’d like them to have a clear run when my in-laws are presented with the final bill.”

“I’d like to thank Mastercard and Visa, without whom this would never have been possible. My wife and I will be forever in their debt.”

Mother-in-law jokes

These always go down well if you actually get on with her! Reference something unique to your mother in law like her shopping obsession or how long she takes to get ready perhaps. Or keep it classic with: “I’ve been told that this is usually one of the only times in a man’s life when he can be around his wife/husband and mother-in-law and not be interrupted – so hang in there, I’m going to take full advantage.”

“In [in-law’s names], I have found the perfect in-laws. I always cringe when I hear jokes about difficult mothers-in-law because my own experience has been far from that stereotype. [Turn to in-laws and whisper audibly] Did I read that right? Please don’t hurt me…”

Tell a story

If your first date, engagement or the time you asked the in-laws if you could marry their daughter/ son has a funny element to it, go ahead and tell the story. Just remember not to kill the humour with too many details.

Talk about your partner’s quirks

Does your wife/ husband have any weird habits? Divulge a few to the guests but make it romantic by saying how much you love her/him even though they… still get drunk after one glass of wine/ still go to bed with a teddy bear at the age of 33/ always get the words to songs wrong/ always have to be the last person on the dance floor even when the lights come up…

Make the thank yous funny

Instead of a boring list of thank yous, try and inject a bit of fun. For example: “I’d like to thank my mother in law for passing on such wonderful traits to her daughter; her kindness, her humour, though unfortunately, an unwavering support for Arsenal has also slipped down the genetic line.”

Trip the guests up

Everyone expects the first line of the groom’s speech to mention his new wife/ husband. Momentarily confuse them with a sentence like this: “My ex-girlfriend/ boyfriend and I would like to thank you all for coming today” – and then pause while they work it out and laugh.

Use props or videos

If there’s a funny prop or a video that you can show during the speech go for it, plus holding something or giving yourself a break in video form can help stop the nerves.

Leave guests guessing

It’s fine to reference the stag do , but don’t tell a long and boring story about something that happened while you were on it. That’ll only be funny to the stags. It’s best to mention something and leave the end of the story untold as a cliff-hanger so that guests can fill in the blanks with all manner of funny thoughts.

As a groom, you have free reign to get emotional and if you’re not normally an emotional person it will really surprise and delight guests as they will realise just how much the day and marrying your loved one means to you.

You don’t want to get too over the top though and make your guests feel uncomfortable. Keep the really mushy stuff for your bride or groom on your honeymoon and instead focus on the sort of emotional sentiments that will make guests smile.

Here are some ideas for how to make your groom’s speech just the right amount of emotional:

Look guests in the eye

The quickest way to get guests to buy into what you’re saying and to feel the raw emotion of your words is by looking them in the eyes as you deliver each sentence. If you’ve had a difficult time in the run-up to the wedding and are really grateful for the support they’ve all shown, say so while looking sincerely at the guests you really want to show your gratitude to.

Put your heart into the thank yous

If you don’t want to make the thank yous funny or witty, how about making them emotional by not just thanking the person for what they did, but by explaining how much it meant to you.

Mention absent friends

If a member of your family or a friend isn’t at your wedding and is greatly missed then make sure to raise a toast to their memory. You don’t want to be morbid, but a few words about how much the person/ people meant to you both and how much you miss them, followed by inviting all guests to raise a toast to them is a lovely emotional gesture.

Let yourself feel the emotion

If you feel yourself welling up don’t stop the emotion – guests won’t mind if your voice breaks a bit or if you have to take a deep breath. In fact, it just shows how much the words actually mean to you.

Be creative when it comes to describing your partner

If you want to inject emotion into your speech, don’t just say sentences that could describe any bride/ groom. Think specifically about your partner and be poetic when you talk about them and it will be much more sincere than just saying: “My new wide is beautiful” or “My husband is kind”. Here’s a lovely example from a groom’s speech about how to reference your new spouse:

Want to make sure your speech is unforgettable? Make it unusual and unique with some of these stand-out suggestions…

Rap the speech

Got a hidden talent for rapping (or if you don’t it can still be hilarious), then why not attempt to rap the speech instead. You could do part of it normally, before breaking out into a fun rap perhaps.

Sing the speech

Got a good set of pipes on you? How about singing your speech instead? Choose a famous song and then write personalised lyrics to fit. You can make it funny or heartfelt – whatever suits your personality best. Having the words on PowerPoint beside you can help in case some guests miss the words.

Write your speech on blackboards around the room

If the idea of public speaking really is too much for you and threatens to ruin your whole wedding day, why not write it up on blackboards that can be displayed around the venue for guests to read instead. You could even pre-record a video of you reading the speech too. Guests who know and love you will appreciate the effort and know how stressful making a speech in person would be for you.

Speak in a different language

Are you marrying someone who is originally from another country and has another language that you don’t speak? Impress both your new wife or husband and especially their family members who make not speak your language by learning some lines in secret in their language. Starting the speech in English for example before changing seamlessly into French will wow your audience and be very emotional for your new partner.

Get other people to do it for you

Track down important guests who can’t make it to the wedding or some famous people if you can and ask them to say something special that you can record and play as part of the speech.

Borrow the words

If you don’t want to make a traditional groom’s speech, how about performing a poem or reading out the lyrics to a song that means a lot to you as a couple (just don’t make it as awkward as Pam and Mick’s rendition in Gavin & Stacey!)

Write a story

Why not make your groom’s speech sound like the start of a novel or children’s story in a ‘once upon a time’ format, but insert yourself and your new spouse as the main characters. After all, your wedding is part of your love story and you can end your speech with a toast to your happily ever after.

Get your guests involved

Don’t like the idea of all eyes being on you? Surprise your wife/ husband by prepping guests beforehand to each say a sentence. Or you can encourage audience participation by turning your speech into a quiz about you as a couple/ the wedding day.

Perform a musical mash-up

Make it themed.

If your bride or groom has a love for something specific, theme your entire speech around it. Take these maids of honour who did a Disney medley as an example:

Tom Fletcher from band McFly did one of the most famous and unusual groom’s speeches of all time. If you can hold a tune why not replicate his speech with your own song…

Nick Jonas went down the heartfelt route for his groom’s speech at his wedding to Priyanka Chopra in 2018 and nailed the thank you to his new mother in law.

Mark Wright from TOWIE gave way to the tears when talking about new wife Michelle Keegan at their wedding: “Not only are you beautiful, but you are one of the most incredible people I have ever met. You truly are sensational in every single way.” Take inspiration from his touching way to be emotional without making everyone feel awkward.

Not a groom’s speech, but you could definitely steal the idea from the best man speech of Danny McKenzie at footballer Jamie Milligan’s wedding – he pretended he had forgotten the speech and then played a video that “showed” him racing through fields and various places James Bond-style to retrieve it…

Hollie Bond

Hollie is a lifestyle journalist with over ten years’ experience working in the wedding industry as Lifestyle Editor for You & Your Wedding magazine Also a Regional Editor for Muddy Stilettos, Hollie has written for Square Meal magazine, Family History Monthly, BBC History magazine and Homes & Antiques. In her spare time you can find Hollie in a dance studio practising ballet…

Learn more about Hollie Bond

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Posts we recommend

Not sure this is the post for you? No problem. We have hand picked some other options that we think might tickle your fancy...

  • Bridal Shower
  • Bachelor & Bachelorette Parties
  • Engagement Party
  • Rehearsal Dinner
  • Wedding Checklists
  • Wedding Hairstyle Ideas
  • Wedding Vows Readings
  • Wedding Music

In This Article

  • Speech Examples
  • Speech Template
  • Speech Tips
  • What to Avoid
  • Toast Ideas
  • Wedding Party & Reception

Groom at Wedding Speech Templates And Ideas

Natalia Bayeva

phuket_wedding_planner via Instagram

Everyone wants to hear the groom say something at the wedding because he’s the man of the hour. For this reason, you must make the opportunity count. While it’s easy to celebrate the good fortune of finding your beloved, giving a speech is a different matter.

ADVERTISEMENT

Ironically, brides are always prepared, but grooms often leave the speech at the last minute, probably from panic. So whether you’re shy, confused about what to do, or don’t have the time to whip up something, we’ve got you covered. See our Post for the best groom wedding speeches tips and ideas ever.

Quick Navigation

Groom Speech Examples

As against the best man speech which focuses more on the groom, the speech of the groom is for everyone, his bride inclusive. As a result, a groom’s speech is either light-hearted, funny, or witty. It has no blueprint or strict rules but two elements are ever-present regardless of what kind of speech it is – emotion and sincerity!

It is a special day and a lot of people made the day possible. In his speech, he will thank everyone and even those absent. He will salute his new father-in-law, the bridesmaids, the maid of honor, and even the bride’s mother.

He will thank his groomsmen and especially his best man for holding him up all the way. The highlight of this speech is when he would make a wedding toast to his beloved, with so much love in his eyes thanking her for coming into his life. He’d tell his love story and show his optimism and willingness to be her husband.

My speech today will be like a mini-skirt. Long enough to cover the essentials and short enough to hold your attention. Apparently, it’s my job to do all the thank you’s, so on behalf of my lovely new wife and I, the biggest thank-you goes to all of you for coming. The day would not have been the same without you and neither would my bank balance! But on a serious note, it is lovely to see so many of you here. Particularly those of you who have had to travel many miles. Amy and I would like to thank our parents for all the love and support both emotional and financial they have given us. And a special thank-you to Vanessa who is responsible for making our fantastic wedding cake. Sharon, Sue, Vanessa, Ray, Steve We’d also like to thank Darren for his services as the best man today and of course our ushers. You’ve all done a grand job. Darren, Mark, Jon, Jim, Adam That brings me onto our bridesmaids. Thank you all for your help and for being there for Amy through the ups and downs of wedding planning! I’m sure everyone will agree that you all look stunning today. Nina, Laura, Charlotte, Kirsty, Fiona, Lillie, Jordan, and Emily. Finally, I would personally like to thank my lovely wife, Amy, for having me as her husband! I read somewhere that “You don’t marry the person you can live with, you marry the person you cannot live without”. Well, we’ve lived together for five years and I know I’ve married the right person. I’m so glad I can at last call you my wife. Now all that remains is for me to say please enjoy the rest of the day…… and mine’s a foster!
………..Good evening ladies, gentlemen, family, and friends. First of all, I must say a big “thank you” to Colin for his kind words. His speech was so good, he’s going to do mine for me too. As many of you will know, I am of the shy retiring type that likes to keep quiet and keep my opinions to myself, therefore you can understand my nervousness at standing up here in front of all of you making a speech. And as many of you will also know, I’m also a compulsive liar, but I am still nervous, that bit is true. I have been fearful of this bit for weeks, and as you can imagine, this isn’t the first time today I have arisen from a warm seat with a piece of paper in my hand. I read while researching wedding speeches that a good speech has a good beginning and a good ending. But the best speech of all is one that keeps these close together. So I will try and keep this as short as possible and will try my best not to do a “Gwinny” with my list of thanks. Firstly I would like to thank any Rangers fans for still being here and not walking out at 4.30 as usual. Pause for cheers But then again, I don’t think we’re friends with any of them anyway. I would like to thank my parents, Ian and Margaret for all the help they have given me over the years, if it wasn’t for them I wouldn’t be here now. So, Helen, if it doesn’t work out you know who to blame. I would also like to thank Helen’s parents, Colin and Sandra, for making me feel like the son they never wanted, sorry the son they never had, right from day 2. Day 1 was a bit rough, but hey, they’re over it now……….
……….You are all aware of our problems over the last few years and one of my biggest worries, especially when I was “down South”, so to speak, was that my two children, Michelle and Nick would go off the rails. I’m pleased to say that they didn’t and they’ve both made us so proud of their achievements so I’d like to propose my toast to them….Michelle and Nick. Very few of you will know, but I am an erstwhile poet when the mood takes me. Anita has always complained that I have never written a poem for her, so I will today amend that omission. It’s called Wedding Day…………
………..On behalf of Julia and myself, or should I say on behalf of my wife and me, we would like to thank everyone for coming today. Everyone has traveled in some way to be here and share this special day with us and we’re delighted to see you all. A special thank-you goes out to those of you who have traveled a greater number of miles to be here today. It’s quite humbling to realize that you’re friends and family that care so much and are willing to travel all that way to share in your special day. Thank you for your cards, kind thoughts and of course all your wedding gifts. They’re all greatly appreciated. Unfortunately, there are two people who can’t be here today, my Dad and my granddad so, it would mean a lot to me if you would all stand for a toast in their memory – To Billy McCleery and James Harrison Snr…………
………….On a serious note, I’d firstly like to say a big thank you to my new Dad Dave. I’m proud to be his son-in-law and hope I can live up to his expectations, which should be easy, compared to his other son Mick! But let us not take this Father, Son thing too seriously, as I’m not into 10-mile runs before breakfast like you were in the Paras. Both Sharon and I would like to say a huge thank you to everyone for coming here today and sharing this special occasion with us. Especially those who brought expensive presents. Its much appreciated! Thank you to Edwin and Elsa, Margaret and Linda and many others who have traveled a long way to be here. It’s certainly a long way from Brighouse! We hope you all enjoy the day, have fun, relax and be merry…………….

Groom Rehearsal Dinner Speech

Congratulations on your upcoming rehearsal dinner speech! Here are three tips to help you write a memorable and meaningful speech:

  • Keep it concise: Your speech should be short and sweet. Aim for no more than five minutes. Remember, this is just a rehearsal dinner, not the main event. You want to keep your guests engaged and entertained, but you don’t want to bore them with a long-winded speech.
  • Personalize it: Share stories and anecdotes that are personal to you and your fiance. Talk about how you met, what you love about your fiancé, and what makes your relationship special. Don’t be afraid to show your emotions – this is a special occasion, after all.
  • Thank your guests: Your rehearsal dinner is a time to thank the people who have supported you throughout your wedding planning process. Take a moment to express your gratitude and thank your guests for being a part of your special day.

Here’s an example of a groom rehearsal dinner speech that incorporates these three tips:

Good evening everyone, and thank you for joining us on this special night. I want to start by thanking our parents, who have been there for us every step of the way. Your love and support mean the world to us. I also want to thank our friends and family who have traveled from near and far to be here with us. We feel incredibly blessed to have you in our lives. As we sit here tonight, I can’t help but reflect on how lucky I am to have found my soulmate in [bride’s name]. I knew from the moment I met her that she was the one for me. Her kindness, intelligence, and beauty continue to amaze me every day. [Optional: insert a personal anecdote here] [Optional: insert a joke or humorous story here] As we prepare to start this new chapter of our lives together, I am filled with gratitude and joy. I can’t wait to see what the future holds for us.

miss to mrs groom box gift

The Great Groom Speech Template

Here’s a groom speech at wedding template that will help you create a winning speech with ease.

  • Thank the guests Say a heartfelt thanks to the guests for leaving their busy schedules to honor you on your big day. Many of them sacrificed time, money, work, and even their safety to come all the way because they love you. Say thank you, mean it, and crack a joke. This is also the time to distribute little gifts or wedding favors to the guests.
  • Say some words about the bride Gush about the woman of the moment. Let the guests feel your joy at getting married to the love of your life. Talk about what attracted you to her, what she means to you, and reiterate your vows. You may also seal this part of your speech with a kiss and watch her blush.
  • Share a memorable story Getting to your wedding day was a long journey and there are stories that bind you. Let the guests know the beautiful way you met, and share sweet memories, funny ones, and romantic events. If both of you have a favorite song, pick a line from it and incorporate it into your speech. Avoid near break-up situations, forgiveness for some errors, or unpleasant situations that happened in your relationship.
  • Share your impressions about the day Recount something beautiful about your wedding day. Maybe talk about how the sun shined bright because it knows an angel got married today. Talk about the beautiful reception, cake, or decor. Just incorporate something from the present.
  • Say some words about the best man Your best man is arguably one of your strongest support systems throughout wedding planning. Give him some accolades in your speech. Talk about how you met and him being your main man through life. Appreciate him sincerely and even take a friendly jab at him.
  • Thank your parents There is no better time to tell everyone how awesome your parents are. Talk about the bride’s parents too because you’re family now. Thank both families for being in your corner and promise to always behave. That will get in a few laughs.
  • Close with a toast Finish your speech with a toast to your wife, parents, guests, love, and happiness.

Groom Speech Tips

A lot of grooms always get confused when trying to write a speech for their wedding. Days before the wedding, they go into a fit of panic because they know absolutely nothing to write. While writing such speech, you are conscious about the introduction, body, and conclusion. You want to catch the guests at the beginning of your speech, keep them interested and close off to a magnetic finishing.

The speech tips below are simple, concise and will give answers to all your questions.

  • Prepare your mind and calm your nerves for the speech.
  • Run speech by your best man to sieve out off liners.
  • Make eye contact with everyone.
  • Address the audience as a couple. Include your wife.
  • Do away with vulgar words or jokes.
  • Include the decent but minimal amount of humor.
  • Don’t forget to thank your parents and in-laws
  • Always throw some compliments the way of your wife and make the core of your speech.
  • Dedicate some part of your speech to your wife. She is the main focus.
  • Make the last toast go to your wife.
  • Make your speech heartfelt and let your personality shine through.

What Not to Say in the Groom Speech

groom speech bride vintage dress veil

kreativwedding via Instagram

A perfect speech will give you unending applause from everyone. But a bad speech? The disasters are too much to mention. You will have in-laws getting pissed at you, the bridesmaids coming for your head. Your best man gunning to have you quartered and your wife preparing to give you hell.

To avoid the later and all other unforeseen ills that could happen with a badly given speech, here are some don’ts to the rescue.

Don’ts

  • Don’t build your speech around anyone else but your wife.
  • Don’t include vulgar words or insensitive jokes.
  • Don’t take too much time making your speech. 5-10 minutes is enough.
  • Don’t forget to introduce your best man and compliments the bridesmaids.
  • Don’t forget to make your last toast to the bride.

levelingup tshirt gift idea

Groom Wedding Toast Ideas

groom speech

The groom’s wedding toast is quite numerous, most of which he will give as he makes his speech. For every stage he concludes in his speech, there is a toast. A toast to the father-in-law, to his best man, to the bridesmaids, to the guests present, and many more. The most important toast is to his wife and both of them as a couple.

To the father of the bride

“Let us toast to my father in law for raising and giving me this beautiful woman. For being a wonderful father to her, although I’m taking over. For accepting me as a son……. “

To the best man

“To my right-hand man for being there all the way. For taking time off work to make all things ready for my big day. For all the sacrifices you made from way back until now. For being my best friend in the real sense and too many more years as friends…..a toast to my best man (insert name)”

Toast To the guests

“A toast to you wonderful people. You are all amazing. Thanks for being here today and sharing in our joy. To many more years of celebration and happiness………. “

To the bride

“Whoever thought this angelic beauty seated here will be mine? Let’s all make a toast to my heartthrob, whose smile lightens my world. A toast to you baby, for all you are, for all you’ll be. To us, to life, to our love, to your happiness, too many blissful years with me, to our future, to forever…………”

Frequently Asked Questions

What should the groom say in his speech.

The groom’s speech typically includes gratitude, compliments to the bride, thanks to guests, and a toast.

What should the groom say at the rehearsal dinner?

The groom at the rehearsal dinner can express appreciation to those involved, share anecdotes, and convey excitement for the upcoming wedding.

How Long Should A Groom’s Speech Be?

A groom’s speech typically lasts around 5 to 10 minutes. It should be long enough to express gratitude, share anecdotes, and convey heartfelt sentiments, but short enough to maintain guests’ interest and keep the overall flow of the wedding reception.

Thank you all again for being here tonight. Let’s raise a glass to love, laughter, and happily ever after! The groom’s speech is one of the most anticipated speeches at a wedding. It doesn’t need such long preparation but could flop if you don’t get the hang of it. Give the best groom speech at wedding ever with the tips, ideas, and templates we’ve curated in this post. Speak from the heart, let your love shine, add some humor and you’re home free.

Stories You Might Like

secular wedding ceremony script bride groom

Secular Wedding Ceremony Script Samples...

mini wine bottle personalized bucket main

Mini Wine Bottles: Perfect for On-The-Go...

hand painted wedding cakes flowers roses main

A Catalog Of Stunning And Trendy...

non traditional wedding vows maktographymk

Non-Traditional Wedding Vows Examples

church wedding decorations fe

Breathtaking Church Wedding Decorations...

simple elegant chic wedding cakes flowers

Romantic Wedding Cakes Guide for 2024

best wedding photos outdoor featured kreativwedding

Best Wedding Photos For Outdoor Wedding

wedding colors wedding color palette trends featured

36 Wedding Color Schemes – Your...

diy wedding ideas wooden decor

20 Amazing DIY Wedding Ideas

wedding party pictures newlyweds cutting cake

From Prep to Party: Wedding Party...

instrumental wedding songs instrumental wedding songs bride groom dance

80 Instrumental Wedding Songs For Each...

styled photo shoot island of tabarca bride groom evening candles oscarguillen

Wedding Styled Photo Shoot on Tabarca...

25 Free Wedding Planning Checklists

Fill in all required * fields below to receive the checklists bundle.

By submitting this form you agree to receive promotional emails from Wedding Forward about other checklists, wedding planning articles, products, and other wedding related topics. You may unsubscribe at any time. Check out our Privacy Policy for more information.

90 years of expert advice and inspiration, for every couple.

  • Engagement Rings
  • Wedding Bands
  • Celebrity Weddings & News
  • Wedding Planning
  • Destination Wedding
  • Invitations & Stationery
  • Wedding Décor
  • Flowers & Bouquets
  • Food & Drink
  • Wedding Cakes
  • Photography
  • Wedding Dresses
  • Bridesmaid Dresses
  • Makeup & Hair
  • Accessories
  • Groom Style
  • Wedding Party Attire
  • Wedding Guest Attire
  • Bridal Fashion Week
  • Skincare & Wellness
  • Engagement Party
  • Bridal Shower
  • Bachelorette Party
  • Rehearsal Dinner
  • Registry Tips
  • Anniversary Gifts
  • Wedding Favors
  • Friends & Family
  • Marriage Proposal Ideas
  • Married Life
  • Love & Dating
  • The Brides Team
  • Editorial Guidelines
  • Editorial Policy
  • Terms of Use and Policies
  • Privacy Policy
  • Wedding Ideas & Advice
  • Wedding Reception Ideas
  • Who Gives a Speech at a Wedding Reception? How to Write a Wedding Toast Tips for the Father of the Bride Speech How to Write a Best Man Toast Advice for the Maid of Honor Speech What to Know About a Newlywed Toast Public Speaking Experts' Wedding Speech Tips 60 Quotes to Use for Your Wedding Toast

Public Speaking Experts Share Their Top Tips for Giving an Amazing Wedding Speech

Check out their best examples and advice to learn how to knock it out of the park.

how to write a good groom wedding speech

Photo by Kurt Boomer

In This Article

Most people would agree that public speaking isn't easy, and this is especially true when you're feeling the added pressure that comes along with giving a speech at a loved one's wedding. Not only do you have the attention of dozens (if not hundreds!) of guests you probably don't know, but you're also trying to appeal to a group of people in a wide range of ages from all different phases of the couple's lives. What's more, you want your speech to delight the couple of the hour and be as appealing to your group of friends as it to the newlyweds' grandparents. All in all, it's a tough task.

Before you panic, know that we're here to help. Ahead, we're sharing a comprehensive guide on what you should include in your speech , how to nail your delivery, and questions to consider to get the brainstorming process started—all from noteworthy speakers, well-established speechwriters, and wedding planners (who have seen it all).

Wedding Speech Template

Every great wedding speech has one thing in common: the right flow. Factor in these guidelines to help you find your own organic rhythm.

Open With a Statement or Question

Don't lead with a joke or a reference to how nervous you are. "The goal is to engage your audience, not make it a boring one-way message," says award-winning motivational speaker Jaime Pfeffer . "You'll lose them if you do this."

Introduce Yourself

After your opener, introduce yourself, says Fallon Carter , a wedding planner, even designer, and professional speaker. "A lot of times, people don't know who is speaking, and they don't know their relationship to the bride or the groom," she says. "It's really important to identify yourself, so make sure you've prepared something."

Address Your Audience

As speaker and life strategy coach Mark Black, CSP , points out, focusing on yourself only enhances nerves. "Instead, concentrate on your audience and how you want them to feel. This will help you to speak from the heart, allowing your speech to do what it's supposed to do: Make the couple feel special while also engaging the audience."

Focus on a Few Points

Seasoned speaker Susan Bender Phelps, CEO of Odyssey Mentoring & Leadership , says her top guideline is to select one to three aspects of the newlyweds that you love and appreciate, along with no more than three short stories to illustrate each of these points (or that one point). "The simple, succinct story or stories where the bride and groom are the hero will work best." This is an excellent way to structure your speech and keep your message focused.

How Long Wedding Speeches Should Be

The ideal length for a speech is three to five minutes, with five minutes being the absolute maximum you should speak for. That's it. "I’ve never been to a wedding where anyone said, 'That was a great wedding, but the best man speech was just too short and that  ruined  it,'" says David Litt , the speechwriter for former President Barack Obama and author of Thanks, Obama .

Carter agrees: "I always say anywhere between two and five minutes—and no more than five minutes," she says. "You want to keep things short and sweet." It's just as important to keep in mind when the speech will take place when determining length, since toasts are often timed with meal courses: "Be mindful of how long a course generally takes or how long it takes people to eat," Carter adds, noting that most courses last between 15 and 20 minutes and that several speeches have to fit inside each window. "If there are other people speaking, you want to be mindful and give them space."

Wedding Speech Tips

Now that you've established the right framework for your words, take note of these essential tips for acing the delivery from a few speaking pros.

Rehearse Regularly

The better prepared you are, the more confident you'll be and the better your speech will be, says author and professional speaker Barry Maher . A good rule of thumb is to practice the speech enough that you can remember the points you want to make and the order in which you want to make them. That way, you can look out to the crowd and make eye contact every so often.

Record Yourself Practicing

Use your phone to take a video of yourself practicing, suggests Kate Kenfield , speaker and sex educator. "It can be a little uncomfortable to watch yourself, but you'll be able to identify distracting mannerisms, such as the verbal pauses 'um,' 'uh,' and 'like'." It's also a good idea to practice your speech in front of someone else. "A second opinion can help you craft your piece and make it that much stronger," she says.

Don't forget body language! Rehearse the speech in front of a mirror and notice things like your facial expression, eye contact, and hand position.

Avoid Alcohol

Although it may be tempting to look for some liquid courage, alcohol definitely won't do you any favors, warns keynote speaker Amy Morin , author of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do . "It may cause you to slur your speech and forget your lines, so wait until after your toast to celebrate," she advises. If you need a drink to loosen up the nerves or can't refrain from participating in a toast without being rude, stick to one glass of Champagne before you address the crowd.

Use Nerves to Your Advantage

A little nervousness can actually liven up your speech. "I get worried if I'm not a little nervous," says Maher. "I'll actually try to make myself a little tense to get my energy level up." The key is to harness that energy and communicate it in a positive, genuine way; tensing up to the point that you forget your words or panic won't make for a great presentation.

Be Yourself

Keep in mind that you're not putting on a show, only sharing your personal perspective. Trying too hard to force the funny can yield the opposite of the desired effect, cautions Matt Dalley, co-founder of Simply Eloped . "I've noticed that keeping it short and sweet, heartfelt and warm, and coming across as authentic and focused on the couple is something we are all capable of and generates some very wonderful moments," he says.

Never Embarrass the Newlyweds

It's a wedding toast, not a roast. While this should go without saying, keep the bachelor or bachelorette party jokes out of it, and remember that grandma and possibly a few colleagues are in the audience, notes Laurie Battaglia , a keynote speaker and workplace strategist. "It's okay to look back at childhood and refer to something funny, but ask yourself if you'd like 200-plus of your closest friends knowing that story about you."

Use Your Notes

Reading your speech straight from a piece of paper is a big no-no. However, having a couple of note cards handy is encouraged. "You're likely to be nervous, excited, and exhausted, which can make you forget your lines," explains Morin. "The audience won't care if you glance at your notes. In fact, there's a good chance they won't even notice."

Wedding Speech Brainstorm Ideas

Need some inspiration? Ask yourself these questions to get the brainstorming process going.

  • Who will speak before you? After you? How will this affect the content of your toast? (Perhaps you want to include a reference to their speech, thank them for an introduction, or introduce the next speaker).
  • Is there someone you should thank for making the event possible and inviting you to speak?
  • What would you want to hear in this speech if you were in the audience?
  • Is there a favorite story or memory that the couple would want you to share with their friends and family?

Wedding Speech Examples to Make Your Own

So, what does it look like when all these elements come together? Wedding vow and speechwriter Katelyn Peterson , owner and creator of Wedding Words , offered us three examples of successful toasts to inspire your own.

Maid of Honor Wedding Speech Example

"Hi, I’m Maya, the bride’s older sister . With Lucy being three years younger, we fell right into our respective roles as sister-rivals growing up. We constantly fought over stolen clothes, monopolizing the phone back when landlines were a thing, and what boy band to blare from the car speakers. I’m still Team Backstreet Boys while Lucy is forever indebted to NSYNC.

Looking back on those memories, I should have stepped up and granted Lucy permission to wear my favorite sweater for picture day, to hand her the phone once in a while, and to let her play, 'Bye Bye Bye.' Even I can admit that’s a good one. But despite Lucy being the younger sister, she has always been more patient, more accommodating, and more thoughtful than me. And that’s because when it comes to the people she loves, she’s all in.

She’s the one to prioritize their desires. She’s the one to compromise first. And, she’s the one to support their dreams as if they were her own. 

This is why it makes me so happy to know that Lucy has found a home in David. He matches her in compassion, thoughtfulness, and warmth. And I know he’ll spend his life prioritizing her desires, being ready to compromise, and supporting her dreams as his own.

Cheers to Lucy and David! May you always feel loved because you always put each other first."

Best Man Wedding Speech Example

"Hello, everyone. My name is Luke and I’m the best man . I met Robert eight years ago when I became his neighbor. His reputation preceded him as I had heard about the 'Block Party King' before my closing papers were inked. 

Rob has never been the guy to wear fancy clothes. In fact, I’m still in shock seeing him in that tux tonight. And he’s never been the guy to show off even though the work he’s put into his vintage Mustang could make Henry Ford himself envious.

But when it comes to cooking, he should receive an award. His pulled pork is a staple at our summer block parties and his homemade barbeque sauce has remained our neighborhood’s best-kept secret. But the most satisfying part about his delicious dishes is that there’s always plenty to go around. And Rob makes sure your plate is never empty. I have no idea how he pulls it off, but Rob has a covert ability to scoop seconds onto your plate without you ever seeing him do it. I hope you all came hungry tonight, folks. You’ve been warned! 

The first time I met Jasmine I could immediately tell she was an amazing person. She laughed at his jokes which I never thought anyone would get. She supported his career and the nonstop travel involved. But most importantly, whenever we’re all hanging out, Jasmine is the one always topping off Rob’s plate with more pasta, more chicken, more of everything. When she’s around, it’s never empty. 

And that’s when I saw what a perfect match they were for each other. I know they will always put each other first, make sure their needs are met, and will never allow the other to go hungry.

So let’s raise our glasses to toast the newlyweds! As you begin this next chapter together, may your plates and your hearts always remain full."

Father of the Bride Wedding Speech Example

"Good evening, family, and friends. I’m Daniel Lee, the father of the bride. I’d like to welcome you to this special occasion where we get to celebrate the love between my daughter Allison and her new wife, Kristin. 

Standing up here today, I’m reminded of all the moments that led to this significant one. The dance recitals that ended with standing ovations and the soccer games that concluded with winning scoreboards. 

But, while those were fun and rewarding times, those aren’t the moments I cherish most with Allison. The memories that make me smile the brightest are those in-between the big stuff moments. It’s the makeshift magic shows in our living room using a bedsheet that Allison confiscated from our linen closet to convert into a curtain. It’s the countless tea parties she hosted with exclusive invitations just for me and her beloved stuffed bear, Buttons. And it’s the way she’d beg to stay up for just five more minutes but was asleep on the couch by minute number two.

Those everyday, blink-and-you’ll-miss-them moments with Allison are the ones that gave color to my life and filled my heart with a happiness I never knew could exist.

So, my beautiful daughter, as you begin your life with Kristin today, I have one wish for you: May your warmest memories come from the ordinary moments throughout your marriage, and may those moments give you a reason to smile brighter every day. Cheers! I love you both." —Daniel

What Not to Say in a Wedding Speech

Your job when delivering a wedding speech is to keep things light—tell an anecdote, make an emotional connection, then wish the couple well before you close out. Anything that doesn't feel definitively positive should be avoided. "I would advocate against bringing up negative details, specifically past relationships or past spouses," says Carter. "Skip anything that you wouldn't want to be physically recorded and played over and over again—this is a rule of thumb."

Keep it light, delicate, and present- and future-focused, Carter adds. "If you're going to go into the past, make those stories really intentional," she says. "Bring those stories back to who they are now. Your mission is to create a great environment and vibe and to potentially give some information about one of the newlyweds, so that it's enlightening for all guests."

A Guide to Wedding Reception Toasts

Who Gives a Speech at a Wedding Reception?

How to Write a Wedding Toast

Tips for the Father of the Bride Speech

How to Write a Best Man Toast

Advice for the Maid of Honor Speech

What to Know About a Newlywed Toast

Public Speaking Experts' Wedding Speech Tips

60 Quotes to Use for Your Wedding Toast

Related Stories

How to Write a Father-of-the-Groom Speech

How to Write a Sister-of-the-Groom Speech

How to Write the Perfect Best Man Speech

How to Write a Wedding Toast: Examples, Tips, and Advice

How to Write a Rehearsal Dinner Toast

How to Write a Maid of Honor Speech

Mother-of-the-Bride Speech Examples and Writing Tips

How to Write a Father of the Bride Speech

Everything to Know About Your Groom Speech: Tips, Advice, and Examples

6 Simple Tips for Delivering an Amazing Best Man Speech

36 Funny Wedding Toasts and Speeches That'll Get the Whole Room Laughing

9 Mistakes You're Making With the Timing and Order of Your Wedding Dances

How to Write an Unforgettable Newlywed Reception Toast

The Ultimate Wedding-Day Packing List for Bridesmaids

60 Wedding Toast Quotes for Every Speech

For Her Provence Nuptials, Designer Katherine Tash Created a Wedding Dress That Told Her Love Story

how to write a good groom wedding speech

Best Groom Wedding Speech: Ideas on how to write The Perfect One

Being a groom can be daunting, especially when it comes to writing your wedding speech. Whether you’re hosting a large wedding or an intimate celebration, standing in front of an audience can be nerve-wracking.

How can you share your love for your bride, and thank your guests, in an entertaining yet sincere manner?

Thankfully, our handy guide to writing the perfect grooms speech is here to help. Discover when to give your groom wedding speech, who to include, and how to write a sentimental speech that your guests (and bride) will love.

Giving a Groom's Speech

Who Does The Groom Toast?

When preparing to write your groom wedding speech it’s important to know who to address. When planning your speech, you’ll want to thank your guests for attending your nuptials, say thank you to the father of the bride (who will give his speech before yours) and your best man. Naturally, you will want to say thanks to your beautiful bride and her family as well as the bridesmaids and your own wedding party. Remember, giving a shout out to specific people will enhance the sincerity of your speech.

If you’re hosting a rehearsal dinner, you may wish to give a short wedding speech at this event as well. Don’t worry too much about this. A speech at your rehearsal dinner needs to be very short and essentially thank the people who have already given toasts as well as thanking other attendees at your wedding rehearsal dinner.

When Should The Groom Give His Speech?

Tradition states that the groom gives his speech at the wedding reception, following the ceremony. The father of the bride generally delivers his speech first, but if there is no father of the bride, you may wish to ask another family member, or the bride, to give a speech first.

Sit down with your bride and decide the order of speeches – you may want to avoid tradition and choose your own order of toasts – whatever you decide is perfectly fine.

Writing A Groom Speech

Writing a groom’s speech doesn’t need to be overwhelming. The key to giving a great wedding speech is preparation. It’s a good idea to begin writing your wedding speech at least several weeks before your actual wedding day. This gives you plenty of time to write the perfect groom wedding speech and rehearse in front of friends or relatives.

The ideal wedding speech for a groom should be a blend of romance, entertainment, and authenticity. Writing doesn’t come naturally to everyone, so to start, write down the main points of your speech first. These tips will help when it comes to writing your first draft.

  • Create a warm introduction by thanking your guests for their attendance, thank the father of the bride, best man, groomsmen, bridesmaids, wedding parties, and of course, your stunning bride.
  • Use “we” to speak on behalf of you and your wife. For example, “we would like to thank…

Related Posts

Where to buy Qalo Rings

Where to buy Qalo Rings?

Veterinary Wedding Bands: Silicone Rings for Veterinary Technicians

Veterinary Wedding Bands: Silicone Rings for Veterinary Technicians

Gold vs. Silicone Wedding Rings: Which is Better [& Why]

Gold vs. Silicone Wedding Rings: Which is Better [& Why]?

Guide to Figuring Out International Sizing for Silicone Rings

Guide to Figuring Out International Sizing for Silicone Rings

Unique Qualities of Silicone Rings That Make Them Popular

Unique Qualities of Silicone Rings That Make Them Popular Among Chefs

Why Promise Rings Have Become So Popular These Days

Why Promise Rings Have Become So Popular These Days

Best Silicone Wedding Rings of 2022

Best Silicone Wedding Rings of 2022

What Kind of Silicone Rings are Trending

What Kind of Silicone Rings are Trending?

Leave a comment cancel reply.

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.

how to write a good groom wedding speech

@2022. All rights reserved. WeddingByColor.com

Jennings Trace Logo – standard

How To Write A Wedding Speech: The Ultimate Guide For Do’s, Don’ts, and Delivery PART 1/3: Do’s

holiday wedding pros and cons

Holiday Wedding Pros And Cons

how to write a wedding speech dont's

How To Write A Wedding Speech: The Ultimate Guide For Do’s, Don’ts, and Delivery PART 2/3: Don’ts

how to write a good groom wedding speech

  • best man speech
  • bridesmaid speech
  • how to write a wedding speech
  • wedding planning
  • wedding speech

how to write a wedding speech dos

how to write a wedding speech dos

Someone you love is getting married, and you’ve just been asked to give a speech at the wedding. What an honor! But also, if you’re not used to giving speeches, what a nightmare! Public speaking can be scary , which is why many people prefer to avoid it. But when your bestie asks you to make a speech at his or her wedding, it’s time to rally. But now you’re wondering if you even know how to write a wedding speech! What makes some wedding speeches fun and memorable, and what makes others cringy and fall flat? We’ve got you. We’ve put together the ultimate guide for how to write a wedding speech, focusing on things you definitely should do, things you definitely should NOT do, and then how to deliver your killer wedding speech like a pro.

If you’re wondering how to write a wedding speech, here are a few “Do’s” to keep in mind.

  • Start planning early
  • Introduce yourself and how you know the bride and groom
  • Thanks to hosts, guests, and wedding party; congratulate the couple
  • Make it personal
  • Think of 3 traits with 3 stories
  • Talk about the couple
  • Have a beginning, middle, and end
  • Consider your audience
  • Keep it short and sweet
  • It’s okay to be simple and meaningful

1. Start planning early

If you don’t know how to write a wedding speech but the bride just asked you to give one, this is not a time to procrastinate. Public speaking is one of the number one fears many people have, so it’s likely you’ve avoided giving too many public speeches before this. And unless you’re a performer or a veteran improv comedian, you might not do too well winging this one. If you get nervous in front of an audience (as most of us do), the best defense against freezing up when you take the mic is being prepared. 

As soon as you know you’ve been asked to give a speech at the wedding, begin jotting down notes immediately. Whenever you’re inspired by a thought of the couple or remember an anecdote that might be worth retelling, make note of it. This will help to give you a pool of ideas to draw from when you start writing down the speech.

Begin gathering ideas and writing the speech a couple of weeks to a month before the wedding. You’ll need time to edit, fine-tune it, and make it concise. And as wedding showers, bachelorette parties, and other wedding festivities begin, you might find there are entertaining stories from these events you want to add as well. If you want to write it all at once, you can do that too. However, make sure to sleep on it and come back with fresh eyes. You don’t want just “okay,” you want your speech to be heartfelt and meaningful.

You will also want to begin early to give yourself time to practice and rehearse your speech plenty of times.

2. Introduce yourself and how you know the bride and groom

No matter how large or small the wedding is, it’s likely you will not be familiar with many of the guests on one or both sides. And they won’t be familiar with you either. So don’t leave them guessing! 

Make sure when you start to write a wedding speech to introduce yourself and mention how you know the couple. This will help them understand the context of your speech, which will also help it to be more well-received. 

3. Thank hosts, guests, and wedding party; congratulate the couple

It’s also courteous to take this time to thank the hosts and other members of the wedding party for all the hard work that went into the event, and to thank guests for being there to support the newlyweds, especially those who had to travel far. 

It’s also a good time to officially congratulate the newlyweds and offer them your personal well-wishes for their future. It is imperative that you don’t forget this part, because they are the whole reason you’re there and giving a speech!

4. Make it personal

Whether you are the maid of honor, the best man, father of the bride, or just a friend, you were asked to give a speech because of your close connection and relationship with either the bride or groom (or both). 

And since you know your friend as well as you do, you probably have plenty of stories to share; so the next tip for how to write a wedding speech is don’t hesitate to make it personal and share those stories! This will also help guests get to know the other half of the couple they might not know as well or are just meeting for the first time. And those guests who do know them will love hearing some entertaining stories they might not have heard yet.

5. Think of 3 traits with 3 stories

If you’re finding it difficult to come up with anything, a useful approach for how to write a wedding speech is to think of 3 positive defining traits or qualities of the bride or groom and recount three stories or examples that illuminate a time they exhibited these traits. These stories could be comedic, heartwarming, or both. Just make sure they are relevant and entertaining!

6. Talk about the couple

If you’re the maid of honor and have been chatting up the bride for the whole speech, part of how to write a wedding speech is to make sure at some point it circles around to the groom, too, and to the two of them as a couple.  

Recount the time you met him, or how you remember talking about him with the bride in the beginning stages of their relationship. If you don’t know the groom all that well, talk about how good they are as a couple and about how happy he makes her. 

And If you’re not a fan of the groom, this is not the time to air your grievances. Always keep it positive. 

7. Have a beginning, middle, and end

All good speeches have a good flow and take the audience along with it. 

Don’t let your speech fall flat or jumble together in a haphazard confusion of disconnected anecdotes. Give it the structure of an overarching theme, with a beginning, a middle, and an end. 

We are not talking about a novel here, just make sure there is a direction to where the speech is going, and that the destination, end, or sentiment is achieved. It doesn’t need to be Charlie Chaplin in The Great Dictator, but a three-act structure does help keep you grounded. Most people also follow a story easier when there is a clear direction for a story or speech. 

8. Consider your audience

The next thing to keep in mind when considering how to write a wedding speech is to make sure you consider who your audience is. 

This is not the bachelor or bachelorette party. There will be a wide range of people present from children to the elderly, and from close friends of the bride and groom to casual acquaintances and coworkers. Make sure your speech is free of any crudeness that might not be fit for such a varied audience. Also, this isn’t the time to take a shot at any of the religious cermonies.

Be considerate and keep it positive and use language everyone can relate to. 

9. Keep it short and sweet

You want your speech to be meaningful and memorable; but the wedding is not about you, and yours is not the only speech. 

No one ever complains about a speech being too short, but they do begin to grumble if it runs on too long. A good rule of thumb to keep in mind when figuring out how to write a wedding speech is to keep your speech between 2-5 minutes long. Any longer than 5 minutes and you’ll lose everyone to thoughts of cake and whether or not to Cupid Shuffle later. 

10. Add humor

Don’t be afraid to be funny! Another tip for how to write a wedding speech is that if you’ve got a lighthearted, creative, joking side, use it and add humor to your speech! Everyone likes to be entertained. 

This doesn’t mean you should scour the internet for generic wedding-themed jokes, but if you’ve got some good original material to use that helps relate a story about the bride or groom in a comedic way, do it. As long as you’re not making fun of the couple but having fun with them, jokes are great. Or you can even poke fun at yourself to illuminate a higher quality in your bestie. It’s all about making the newlyweds shine. 

If you’re creative and have other talents, use them! If you are musical, bust out your instrument and/or vocal cords and make the speech in the form of a song! Use props, and get the other guests involved! The newlyweds will feel special because you created something for them, and the guests will love joining in the fun.

11. It’s okay to be simple and meaningful

If entertaining isn’t your thing, that’s okay! Don’t force it – just be yourself. It’s okay to be simple and meaningful with your speech. Always keep in mind when you go to write a wedding speech that what’s important is that you are genuine and speak from the heart.

Hopefully, you found these tips for how to write a wedding speech helpful, and can start writing today! And stay tuned to our blog for the next part in this ultimate guide for how to write a wedding speech where we highlight a few things you should definitely avoid.

Love this content and want more? Read more about weddings on our blog ! Involved in the wedding planning process and the bride is still looking for a venue ? Give us a call today and we’ll help you find the perfect place!

Jennings Trace

Jennings Trace

Related posts.

how to write a good groom wedding speech

Bridesmaid Responsibilities: A Guide

how to write a good groom wedding speech

So Your a Groomsman, Now What?

Your wedding day is a momentous occasion, and choosing the right wedding suit is key to looking and feeling your best.

Your wedding day is a momentous occasion, and choosing the right wedding suit is key to looking and feeling your best.

Dapper Decisions: Picking what “Suits” You

how to write a good groom wedding speech

I need an example of a good wedding speec for the bride.Its my first time.

[…] infusing genuine emotion into your wedding speech is essential for creating a heartfelt connection with the audience. Expressing warmth, sincerity, […]

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.

Take advantage of our special offer! $1000 off all wedding dates through 2024! Saturdays are available and openings will fill up quickly so please contact us to secure one of our available dates. * Offer valid for new bookings only.

Young, Hip & Married

How to Write A Killer Bride or Groom Wedding Speech

Young, Hip & Married

Writing a wedding speech can be a daunting task, especially if you’re nervous about speaking in front of a group. But it’s an awesome opportunity to let your nearest and dearest know how much they mean to you and how much you appreciate them celebrating the start of your marriage with you.

Traditionally, brides don’t give speeches. They sit quietly and listen while their dad, the best man and the groom give speeches. Brides were to be seen and not heard. But we’ve had enough of that. If you’re a bride who wants to speak at your own wedding – more power to you! We 100% support a bride being heard on her own wedding day.

Getting ready to write your bride or groom wedding speech? Awesome! We’ve got all the steps you need to write a killer wedding speech that will leave the room laughing, crying and applauding wildly by the time you drop the mic.

Decide on the logistics

Before you get to the nitty-gritty of speech writing, figure out some of the big picture issues. Who is going to be giving the speech? Are you speaking together or separately? If you’re giving two separate speeches, who is going first? When in the night are you giving the speech? How long will the speech be? What’s the tone going to be?

Start your wedding speech with some thank yous

This one is easy! You start your speech by giving a round of thank yous. Thank all of your guests for coming, thank your wedding party for supporting you, thank out-of-towners for making the trek, thank your parents for all their love, thank your new spouse’s parents for welcoming you into the family, thank special people who made the day possible, thank vendors, THANK THEM ALL! Or, y’know, thank who you want to thank.

giving a wedding speech at their wedding reception

Mention those who couldn’t be there

This step is optional, but if you’d like, it’s a great time to pay tribute to people who couldn’t be at your wedding. This could be important people who couldn’t physically make it, maybe they are unable to travel or sick. Or this could be people who have passed on that you want to honour on your special day.

Add a short & sweet anecdote to your wedding speech

Here’s the fun part: now you get to gush about your boo! Include a short story about how you met, when you knew you were in love or a funny tidbit from wedding planning. The idea here is that you want to share a cute story, nothing embarrassing. And you’ll want to keep it short, especially if you and your spouse are both sharing little stories. You’ll also want to double check with anyone else giving speeches that you’re not all re-telling the same story.

bride and groom wedding thank you speech at their wedding reception

End with your partner

You made it! You’re at the end of your speech. Now all you have to do is address your partner and cue the waterworks. This is where you let your brand new husband or wife know how happy you are to be married to them, how much today has meant to you or anything you weren’t able to fit into your vows.

Practice makes perfect

Especially if you’re nervous, rehearse your speech. Stand in front of the mirror, ask someone in your wedding party to lend an ear or recite your speech to your dog. And if you’re planning on doing the speech together and splitting up the different sections, you’ll definitely want to practice with your partner. If there are parts of the speech you want to keep as a surprise for the big day, that’s totally fine. Just rehearse the rest together so you know who says what when.

bride and groom wedding speech at their wedding reception, tips for writing your wedding speech

You know what we say – your wedding, your way! So if you’re really nervous about giving your speech in front of so many people, maybe you can give a speech at your rehearsal dinner in front of a smaller audience instead. If you’re scared you’ll be all teary by the end of the speeches, forget the tradition of the couple speaking last and do your speech first. And if the idea of a speech totally terrifies you, skip it all together! You can give out cards to your loved ones or talk to them one on one and let them know how much you appreciate them making your wedding day magical.

Last minute dos & don’ts for writing the best wedding speech ever!

  • DO: write it down and don’t try to wing it. Have a paper copy so you’re not frantically trying to find your phone only for it to die when you’re halfway done your speech.
  • DON’T: wait until you’re too drunk to give your speech. If you think you’ll be sloshed by 8:00pm, give your speech by 7:00pm.
  • DO: feel free to respond to other speeches. If you go last, you can totally improvise a bit and thank you dad for his sweet words or try to defend yourself in the story your best man just told.
  • DON’T: hog the mic. If you and your partner are giving the speech together, divide it up so you can both speak equally.
  • DO: be courteous of your guests’ time. Especially if you have a lot of speeches planned, try to keep yours short and to the point.
  • DON’T: share anything too embarrassing, too intimate or too inside joke-y. Trust us, you’ll regret it when your nana comes up to you later and asks you to explain that story from the time you had a pregnancy scare in Vegas.

Are you planning to give a speech at your wedding?  For more wedding planning advice, visit our blog . And to learn more about our team of wedding officiants and book an officiant for your wedding, get in touch! 

written by Riana Ang-Canning

Riana Ang-Canning (headshot)

Riana Ang-Canning

Riana Ang-Canning has been working with Young Hip & Married since 2017. She is a professional content writer with experience in travel, lifestyle and weddings. Riana not only writes Young Hip & Married blog posts but is also involved with the company's internal communications, social media, copywriting and more. She knows YHM, and the wedding world, inside and out!

'  data-srcset=

Related Articles

The Ultimate Wedding Ceremony Planning Checklist

The Ultimate Wedding Ceremony Planning Checklist

How to Write an Incredible Best Man Speech

How to Write an Incredible Best Man Speech

What’s the Difference Between a Wedding and an Elopement?

What’s the Difference Between a Wedding and an Elopement?

4 Mother of the Groom Wedding Speech Samples

4 Mother of the Groom Wedding Speech Samples

how to write a good groom wedding speech

The Ultimate Groom's Wedding Speech Checklist

Don't leave anyone or anything important off your list of thank yous.

how to write a good groom wedding speech

The groom's wedding speech is often about covering all bases. It doesn't have the bravado and general LOLs of a best man speech , the gushing and poignant words of a bridesmaid speech, or all the nostalgia and tear-jerking words of a father of the bride or groom speech. Instead, a groom's speech is half admin, half emotion; kind of like an Oscar acceptance! A chance to shout out the wedding party, thank the ushers, and tell your new in-laws how chuffed you are to be part of the family. To help you write your speech - and to make sure you don't leave anyone out - we've put together a handy groom's wedding speech checklist . You'll thank us later!

Best man speech cheers initials champagne prosecco

A groom doing a speech solo is more common, but we've also seen lots of couples do their thank you speech together , as well as brides making speeches too ( more ladies on the mic please !). Our list covers all bases and standard family structures, but tweak it as is appropriate for you. Hopefully it comes in handy whatever kind of wedding thank you speech you're making.

how to write a good groom wedding speech

Groom's Wedding Speech Checklist

(In no particular order, but this order makes for a nice crescendo!)

  • Thank the guests for coming - give a special shout out to anyone who's come a long way
  • Thank any staff or suppliers who worked on the day - only those present
  • Thank the celebrant - if present
  • Thank anyone who helped in the lead up to the day (outside of the wedding party and immediate family) - any one who gave lifts, stitched bunting, glued centrepieces, etc.
  • Thank anyone who took part in the day itself - ceremony readings , music, wedding cake baker, etc
  • Mention your new parents in law and siblings - this is a good time to tell them how happy you are to join the family, how welcome/terrified they made you feel, how you promise to be there for their son or daughter/brother or sister.
  • Mention your siblings  - be specific about things they helped you with or special memories. This is also a good time to mention any other special family members, grandparents, step-parents, etc.
  • Mention your parents - if both your parents are present, thank them both individually, usually an anecdote about the kind of person they've taught you to be goes down well.
  • Thank your wedding party - make sure both sides get a mention, though it's fine to gush a bit harder about your best man!
  • Thank your other half - for marrying you, for looking fabulous, for being wonderful, and all the other good things you can think of. Remember to tell them all about why you love them and why you can't wait to get started with married life!

how to write a good groom wedding speech

Need more help with your wedding speeches - we've got you covered!

  • 30 Funny Opening Lines for Wedding Speeches
  • How to Begin a Wedding Speech: Great Opening Lines
  • The Correct Order of Speeches at a Wedding?
  • 9 Ways to Shake Up Your Wedding Speeches
  • How to Give a Flawless Best Man Speech
  • Everything You Need To Play Wedding Speech Bingo

Listen & Subscribe to The One Fab Day Wedding Podcast

Episode 22: wedding speeches 101.

how to write a good groom wedding speech

You can listen to the One Fab Day Wedding Podcast wherever you get your podcasts , and search them on Spotify and Apple Podcasts.

Image credits

Tomasz kornas photography, via one fab day, see more in:.

how to write a good groom wedding speech

You might also like...

how to write a good groom wedding speech

Subscribe to the Newsletter

Your Ultimate Guide to Writing a Meaningful Wedding Speech

Bride and groom listening to groomsmen's speech at wedding

  • Lauren is a contributor for The Knot covering topics such as music, cakes, venues and speeches.
  • She has been published in a wide array of lifetsyle-oriented publications including SELF and Allure.
  • Lauren is a proud graduate of Syracuse University's SI Newhouse School of Public Communication.

Getting asked to speak at a wedding is exciting, but it can also be nerve-wracking, especially since you're not a professional speaker or speechwriter! So, if you're unsure how to write a wedding speech , know you're not alone. Whether you're a member of a wedding party or a parent or sibling of the soon-to-be-married couple, you may be wondering what to say in a wedding speech. However, that's where we come into the picture: Keep reading for a full rundown of wedding speech tips , insight and, last but not least, a fully written example that you can use as a guide. Happy speechwriting!

In this article:

How to Write a Wedding Speech

Wedding speech example, wedding speech tips.

Writing your wedding speech is no easy feat. To help ensure things go as smoothly as possible, we tapped into Renée Dalo, owner of Moxie Bright Events in Los Angeles, California. Below, she shares a step-by-step guide.

Brainstorm a great opening.

To captivate other guests' attention, Daloe recommends taking some time to brainstorm a great opening. For example, she says, "Try to resist saying, 'For those of you who don't know me, I'm Erica's sister, Michelle.'" Instead, skip this entirely in favor of something more fun and creative.

Start with a story.

…but be sure to make it a short one, says Dalo. "Make sure it's relevant to your friendship and/or the couple." When selecting what story to share, the wedding pro recommends sterling clear of any that involve ex-partners—and for that matter, anything negative about the newly married couple. "Even if you think it's funny , she says, "it's not." Instead, think of a special moment or fun memory you shared with the couple. What did it involve? What was so great about it? All of these things are worth considering as you jot down your wedding speech.

Share your well wishes.

After all, what would a wedding speech be if it didn't include some well wishes for the newlyweds? "Make sure to include both people in the couple in your remarks," advises Dalo.

End with a toast.

Cap off your speech on a fun and sentimental note by ending with an actual toast . Dalo recommends this foolproof example: "Please join me in raising a glass to the happy couple. Cheers to X and Y, and best wishes for a lifetime of laughter!" Afterward, go in for a hug with the couple, making for the perfect photo op !

Rehearse away.

After you write your speech down, spend a significant amount of time rehearsing it so that you feel confident and comfortable while giving the actual speech. "Don't try to wing it," says Dalo. "You're going to want to rehearse this [so that] you can be as calm and present as possible."

Still trying to figure out where to start? Don't fret: If you could use some additional assistance writing your wedding speech, consider Provenance , which helps users create personalized, meaningful wedding speeches using AI-powered tools along with real responses to personal questions.

Take the Provenance Toast Builder , for example. Couples can invite those who will be giving wedding speeches—including the father of the bride , mother of the bride , father of the groom , mother of the groom , maid of honor and best man —to use the Toast Builder. Upon being invited to use the platform, these individuals will "get alerted to how long their speech can be," as well as any other important information to mention—or steer clear of. "From there," says Provenance CEO Steven Greitzer, "you can see the status of the speech and the estimated length."

To help get those creative juices flowing, check out the below wedding speech example.

Hi! As Lisa's younger sister—and now maid of honor—I've had the unique privilege of growing up alongside her. Since we're just two years apart, we've been each other's built-in best friends from the start. Like most sisters, we bickered constantly throughout our childhood, hurling insults over clothing, makeup and missing pieces of jewelry: I'll finally admit it, Lisa, I was the one who lost your charm bracelet at summer camp! All kidding aside, I hope I've made it up to you with this epic speech.

When Lisa first met Jay on the train coming home from work (romantic, I know!), we lived together in a tiny one-bedroom apartment in the city, an experience that only brought us closer together. After their first date to their now-favorite pizza place, she came home all giddy—bubbly, smiling, and laughing. She told me that the two of them already planned their next date. I had never seen her so happy. The look in her eyes since that night has not faded, and if I know Jay—which I do!—he will make sure it never will.

Like Lisa, Jay is kind, patient, and compassionate, and this was evident from the first time we met, which was right before his and Lisa's second date. I ran to the door to catch a glimpse of the guy who was slowly but surely stealing my sister's heart. Upon meeting, Jay and I instantly hit it off. He greeted me by name, hugged me, and took the time to sit down and truly get to know me. Less than 10 minutes later, we were already cracking jokes. It was clear to me then that Jay was, without a doubt, my sister's perfect match.

Lisa and Jay, you've set the bar (very) high for all of your friends and family when it comes to relationship goals. The love and commitment you share with each other is inspiring and everlasting. I know Jay will spend the rest of his life making Lisa happy and supporting her through every endeavor—and I know she'll do the same, too.

So, Lisa and Jay, I wish you nothing but a lifetime of love and happiness together. And I'm so excited to have a front-row seat to all that's in store. Everyone, please join me in raising a glass to the newlyweds!

Keep it short and sweet.

According to Dalo, your wedding speech should be "no more than three minutes." She continues, telling The Knot, "Three minutes is a long time, and when you figure in getting up to the mic and then hugging afterward, it's about five minutes total which is ideal." If you go any longer, you run the risk of losing guests' attention and potentially boring them (a no-no in our book!).

Acknowledge both partners.

"A big speech taboo that we see way too often is when the person giving the speech only talks about the partner they're closest with, unintentionally making the other partner feel left out and unimportant," says Greitzer. If you need a helping hand, Greitzer recommends using the Provenance Toast Builder , which offers "thoughtful prompts to encourage you to share why they're both 1) good people and 2) a great match for each other."

Bride giving speech during wedding reception.

Laybuy and Afterpay available

Forget Me Not Journals

  • $ 0.00 0

how to write a good groom wedding speech

Baby Books & Childhood Journals

baby journal child prompted journal book 118 2

Writing the Groom’s Speech: The Ultimate Guide to Your Wedding Toast

  • Wedding Planning

Unless you’re a fan of public speaking, you’ve probably found your way here wondering how on earth you’re meant to begin writing the speech for your wedding day…

Well, as a groom, you’re in luck, the Groom’s Wedding Speech is actually a very simple, straightforward one to write, and with a couple of read-throughs, you’ll nail it (even if you are reading this the night before.

In what order should the Groom’s speech be?

A Groom’s Wedding Speech is one of the four traditional wedding speeches. Typically, the Groom’s wedding speech follows the speeches of the Father of the Bride and the Best Man, and is followed by the Maid of Honour (historically, a Bride would not make a speech). Of course, it will be completely up to you as a couple to decide who will be speaking, and what order that should be in (though someone may just surprise you and wish to speak on the day!), and of course, if this is a same-sex wedding, there may be two Grooms making speeches.  See all the different ways  same-sex couples can reinvent the speech section of their wedding.

Why the Groom’s Speech is the Easiest Wedding Speech to Write

It’s often said that the groom’s speech is the easiest speech to write because it has a simple structure and purpose. Here are some reasons why:

  • Shorter length: The groom’s speech is usually shorter than other speeches, such as the Father of the Bride or Best Man’s toast. This means that there is less pressure to come up with a lot of content, be particularly funny or entertaining, or even share personal stories – leave that up to the others if you wish.
  • Simple structure: The Groom’s speech typically follows a very simple structure, starting with an opening thank you and acknowledgment of the Bride, followed by a brief anecdote or two, possibly about wedding planning (and how much or little you’ve had to do with it), and ending with a toast to the future. This structure makes it easy to plan and write the speech.
  • Personal experience: The Groom’s speech is often based on personal experience, making it easier to write from the heart. The Groom can share stories about how he met his Bride, how he fell in love, or when he knew he wanted to marry her, which can easily make for a heartfelt and meaningful speech. Trust us, all anybody really wants to hear is how stunning you think your new wife is, and what a phenomenal job she has done planning the day (even if you think you took on a fair share of it!)

How to Write the Groom’s Wedding Speech

  • Start with a plan

Before you begin writing your speech, it’s important to have a plan in place. Think about the key points you want to make and how you can weave them together into a cohesive message, possibly incorporating a point into both the introduction and conclusion.

  • Begin with a strong opening

To captivate your audience from the start, consider beginning with a strong opening. This could be a heartfelt quote or a humorous story that sets the tone for the rest of your speech. The goal is to grab the attention of your audience and set the tone for the rest of your speech.

  • Speak from the heart

The best wedding speeches are those that come from the heart. While it can be tempting to focus on jokes or generic sentiments, take the time to speak honestly about your feelings. Share what you love about your new spouse and what makes your relationship special. Speak from the heart, and your words will be sure to resonate with your audience.

  • Keep it concise

While you may have a lot to say, it’s important to keep your speech concise. Aim for a speech that lasts around five minutes, as anything longer can cause your audience to lose interest. Stick to the key points you want to make and be mindful of your audience’s attention span.

  • Include humor

Wedding speeches don’t have to be serious all the time. In fact, including humor can be a great way to engage your audience and lighten the mood. Consider adding a funny story or anecdote to your speech to break up the more serious moments., practice, practice.

  • Practice Reading Your Speech

Once you’ve written your speech, it’s time to practice. Read it out loud several times to get a feel for how it sounds and to make sure it flows well. Consider practicing in front of a mirror or in front of a friend to get feedback. The more you practice, the more comfortable you’ll feel delivering your speech on the big day.

Making the Groom’s Speech Funny

If humour comes naturally to you, your speech is likely to be funny too, and your guests are the ones who know and love you best (so they’ll definitely laugh along with you). If you struggle to tell personal anecdotes, consider including some funny quotes or sweet sayings:

  • “The secret to a good marriage is to be a little deaf.”  —  Ruth Bader Ginsburg 
  • “If at first you don’t succeed…try doing it the way your wife told you.”  —  Unknown
  • “The secret to a happy marriage remains a secret.”  —  Henny Youngman
  • “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times—always with the same person.”  —  Mignon McLaughlin (this one’s in our ‘ I still do ‘ anniversary journal)
  • “To keep your marriage brimming with love in the loving cup, whenever you’re wrong, admit it; whenever you’re right, shut up.”  —  Ogden Nash

What should the Groom actually say in his wedding speech?

Of course, the groom’s wedding speech is also an opportunity to express his love and appreciation for his partner in front of friends and family. It’s a chance to share heartfelt words that capture the essence of their relationship and the depth of his feelings. While there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to writing a groom’s speech, the following tips can help create a personal and loving tribute:

  • Start with gratitude: Begin by thanking everyone for being there to celebrate this special day. Express your gratitude for their love and support, and how much it means to have them all there with you.
  • Acknowledge your partner: Take a moment to acknowledge your partner and how much they mean to you. Share a personal story about how you met or something that has strengthened your relationship over time. Speak from the heart and let your emotions guide you. Thank them, if they have worked really hard to plan the wedding , as it has probably been a huge emotional undertaking for them too.
  • Speak to their qualities: Talk about the qualities you admire in your partner, such as their kindness, compassion, sense of humor, or intelligence. Share specific examples that demonstrate these traits and how they have impacted your life.
  • Express your love: This is the perfect opportunity to express your love and affection for your partner. Use language that is personal and meaningful to you, whether it’s through poetry, song lyrics, or your own heartfelt words.
  • Make promises: A wedding is a celebration of a lifelong commitment, so take this opportunity to make promises to your partner about the future you will build together. Reinforce the vows you wrote to each other . You might promise to support them through thick and thin, to always be their partner in life, or to continue growing and learning together.
  • Thank the families: Thank both families for their love and support, and for coming together to celebrate this special day. Acknowledge any special people in your partner’s life, such as parents or grandparents, and express your gratitude for their presence.
  • End with a toast: Raise a glass to your partner, your families, and your future together. Invite everyone to join you in celebrating this joyous occasion and toast to the happiness and love that lies ahead.

Is there anything the Groom shouldn’t say in his speech?

Ah, yes, we’re so glad you asked, there are a few things never to include in a wedding speech .

  • No matter how funny the anecdote sounds to you on paper, ex-girlfriends or past relationships for either party are off the table . It’s best to avoid this topic entirely.
  • Controversial or sensitive topics: Weddings are a time to celebrate love and happiness, so it’s best to avoid controversial or sensitive topics that could potentially upset or offend guests. This could include politics, religion, or other divisive issues.
  • Inside jokes or stories that are inappropriate: While inside jokes and stories can be entertaining, it’s important to consider whether they are appropriate for a wider audience. If a story or joke could potentially embarrass or offend someone, it’s best to avoid it.
  • Negative comments about anyone (ANYONE): A wedding is a time to celebrate and show love, so it’s important to avoid negative comments or criticism of anyone. This includes family members, friends, vendors, or even the bride or groom themselves. Don’t resort to self-deprecating humour, this just isn’t the time. See etiquette guide to wedding speeches .

Remember, the most important thing is to speak from the heart and be true to yourself. While it can be tempting to focus on jokes or generic sentiments, take the time to speak honestly about your feelings. Share what you love about your new spouse and what makes your relationship special. Speak from the heart, and your words will be sure to resonate with your audience. Don’t worry too much about getting the words perfect – the emotion behind them is what really counts. With these tips in mind, you can create a personal and loving tribute to yo.ur partner that will be remembered for years to come.

Finally, the best, most entertaining and engaging speeches are ones which are to the point and concise. Aim for a speech that lasts around five minutes, as anything longer can cause your audience to lose interest. Stick to the key points you want to make and be mindful of your audience’s attention span.

voted best wedding planner book australia little white book

shop our best selling

Wedding planner book.

“Undoubtedly the best wedding planner book!” 

Frequently voted the best wedding planner book and featured in international magazines and publications (Cosmopolitan, Glamour UK & CNN to name a few), the little white book is a the ultimate wedding planner, 12 month journal, diary and keepsake.

Related Posts

average wedding budget new zealand 30000 australia -2.jpg

Is the Average Cost of a NZ Wedding $30,000 in 2024?

Polaroid Wedding Guest Book

The Perfect Polaroid Guest Book for Weddings

How to Write the Bride's Speech

Writing the Bride’s Speech: The Ultimate Guide to Your Wedding Toast

How to write a wedding speech to your Wife

How to Write a Wedding Speech to Your Wife

Making Barbie Wedding Dresses Bridal Shower

Making Barbie Wedding Dresses | Bridal Shower or Hens Party Activity

couples journals wedding anniversary journals australia nz love wedding planner diary 06

How to Celebrate your Wedding Anniversary

Forget me not.

Forget Me Not Journals © 2022 

FORGET ME NOT   | formerly ‘ SHE SAID YES’

Groom Speech Examples

The groom often gets a good roasting from the best man, so the groom’s speech is a chance to get in a few jokes of his own! As well as thanking the wedding party and both sets of parents, what all the guests are waiting for are some romantic and heartfelt words about his new spouse. You’ll find plenty of example groom speeches to help inspire you when the time comes to write yours, plus jokes and delivery tips.

Recently added to Hitched

The Wedding Secret Magazine

The Wedding Secret Magazine

Tips and advice for planning your big day

  • We love Titchwell Manor’s rebrand! 12/05/2022

how to write a good groom wedding speech

How to Write the Perfect Groom Speech

It’s the day you’ve been waiting for all your life. You’ve married your beautiful bride, tucked into the delicious food, and now all that is left to do is relax before the evening reception. Wait, don’t forget about your speech!

For many of us, speaking in front of a room full of people is probably pretty nerve wracking. After the act of actually getting married, giving the Groom speech is probably the second most nerve-wracking thing every man has to face on his wedding day, and it’s easy to see why.

Groom's Speech - photo by Hiller James

To help you out, we’ve talked to some industry professionals to get their expert advice. Below, we have outlined everything you need to mention in order to make your speech a hit.

The Structure

Thank your guests.

Coming to a wedding is a big expense for everyone involved. Your guests pay for a good amount of petrol (or even flights), a hotel room, and your gift. Therefore, it is important you make sure they know they’re appreciated.

Groom's Speech - photo by Pip and Simon Photography

The first way you can do this in your speech is by thanking them. On the other hand, if you make your whole speech relatively short, they can get on with drinking and dancing. Trust me, everyone will appreciate this!

Toast absent friends

Toast to those who couldn’t make it, as well as those who are no longer alive. All guests should be thanked, even ones who are not there. Don’t be afraid to show your sensitive side here. It’s a nice touch and it will definitely be appreciated.

Big up your best man and your ushers

Your best man has been with you every step of the way with this wedding, so thank him for this. Don’t forget your ushers, either. Your boys have done you a big favour by playing a part in your wedding day (even if all they did was roll out of bed and put on a nice suit), so don’t be afraid inject a little bromance in your speech.

Groom's Speech - photo by Penny Young

And, of course, make some jokes at their expense. After mentioning deceased friends and relatives, this is a good time to lighten the mood. Furthermore, your best man probably mentioned some embarrassing anecdotes about you in his speech, so get him back!

Just remember this speech isn’t all about you and your mates

“But please do this briefly,” says Seb of  Great Speech Writing . “One regular complaint from wedding guests is that they came to listen to stories about the bride and groom, not the groom and his best man. Don’t forget who you are marrying and why you have asked people to come and celebrate.”

Groom's Speech - photo by Tansley Photography

Don’t forget everyone else. Tradition dictates you mention the bridesmaids and flower girls as well. They played a massive role in the day and have likely also acted as important support for your new wife. Especially if your wife isn’t speaking, make sure they know they are appreciated.

Others who have lent a helping hand

This is not school speech day; however, you should still acknowledge those who’ve made your day the wonderful occasion it’s been. For example, consider the person who set you up with your spouse, or the venue manager. If you haven’t given them a nod yet, do so here.

Groom's Speech - photo by Him and Her

Be careful of rattling off a list like an Oscars speech, though. “It is important to thank those people who have helped you on the way to this special day but there is always a risk of simply standing there and reading a list of people to whom you wish to show your appreciation,” says Kevin of  Speeches For You .

Seb of Great Speech Writing agrees. “You don’t want you speech to become a long list of thank yous,” he points out. So just keep it to the really vital people. Everyone else can get a thank you note.

Your new in-laws and your own parents

This is your moment to gain some serious credit with your new wife’s parents, so don’t throw it away. Thank them for all they’ve done. If they paid for the wedding, sing their praises to the rafters. Thank them for raising the woman of your dreams and for accepting you into the family. And, even if they haven’t quite accepted you yet, that doesn’t matter right now! Get your now legally-binding relationship with them off to the right start nevertheless and make them feel appreciated.

Groom's Speech - photo by Real Simple Photography

When it comes to your mum and dad, only you know what to say. They raised you and, hopefully, have supported you through good times and bad, so make sure they feel the love.

Last, but absolutely never least, your new wife is the star of the show on your wedding day. Therefore, make sure the longest and most heartfelt part of your speech is all about her. It’s cliché, yes, but if you don’t mention how beautiful she is, how lucky you are, and how you’re punching well above your weight with her, you won’t have done your job with your speech.

Groom's Speech - photo by Susie Mackie

Then, talk about your relationship in as genuine and real a way as you can muster. If you both have a good sense of humour and you like joking around, let that come through here. But, nothing is worse than a groom who spends his speech reciting bad one-liners he found on the internet.

If you do tell some jokes or a funny story about your new wife, think hard about what tales to go for. Some jokes are best left just between you two. That being said, a couple of funny and endearing stories can go a long way.

Make your speech memorable for all the right reasons  

It’s up to you to break the ice, but keep it simple.

“Weddings always have a large mix of people and not many know one another,” Kevin of Speeches for You says. “You and your wife will probably be the only people who know everyone in the room. Including some shared memories will have guests talking to each other after the meal and will make for a much more pleasant atmosphere in the evening.”

Groom's Speech - photo by Hiller James

Maybe you’re the type of guy who doesn’t really wear his heart on his sleeve, and for whom saying a lot of cheesy, lovey things during your speech would feel alien. In that case, don’t force it. It’ll feel and look awkward and disingenuous.

Bear in mind that the most important thing during this part of your speech is to stay true to yourself and to represent your relationship honestly and with love, and no one can dictate to you how to do that.

Other things to bear in mind

This part of your day doesn’t have to be scary if you don’t let it be. As long as you’ve written a speech that is authentic to you and your relationship, you really can’t go wrong. Be as funny or as serious as you typically are in your everyday life; forcing either one will make for a boring or robotic speech that will be forgettable or even embarrassing.

Timing is key

When it comes to timing, try to keep it to 5-10 minutes. According to Seb, as much as your guests love that you’re happy and in love, they’re mainly there to party. And, before you think that’s untrue or harsh, remember the last time you sat through speeches at a wedding. As for the toasts, keep it down to two; one to the bridesmaids and one to your new wife. Any more than that and your speech could turn into a drinking game.

Groom's Speech - photo by Susie Mackie

And if you are left totally blank? “Just remember to thank the parents, the best man for his help, and the guests for coming, and say how beautiful your wife is,” Seb says. That’ll guarantee you say what needs to be said with as little drama as possible!

So, go ahead and write an amazing speech (or ask for help from Seb or Kevin). Wow your guests and, more importantly, your new spouse. We also have speech writing advice for the Father of the Bride and the Best Man . Good luck.

2 thoughts on “ How to Write the Perfect Groom Speech ”

Crucially – don’t get too tied down by ‘the speech rules’ or traditional etiquette. Other than keeping the speech no longer than ten minutes and thanking the important people – the speech is yours to have fun with.

Gray is a well known colour for the grooms. So, this colour is elegant. I love that style thanks.

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Post Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed .

Related Posts

Lucy and Sam’s Wedding at Bedruthan Steps in Cornwall

Lucy and Sam’s Wedding at Bedruthan Steps in Cornwall

Reduce Your Wedding’s Carbon Footprint With These Eco Wedding Ideas

Reduce Your Wedding’s Carbon Footprint With These Eco Wedding Ideas

Handfasting and Pagan Wedding Ceremonies | An Alternative-Religious Wedding!

Handfasting and Pagan Wedding Ceremonies | An Alternative-Religious Wedding!

First Wedding Anniversary Gift Ideas – Paper

First Wedding Anniversary Gift Ideas – Paper

Begin typing your search term above and press enter to search. Press ESC to cancel.

how to write a good groom wedding speech

HOW TO WRITE A MEMORABLE GROOM SPEECH

MEMORABLE GROOM SPEECH

Traditionally, the wedding reception is home to several speeches from the wedding party and the bride and groom’s parents. It’s a time to celebrate the new marriage and share stories of fond memories of the couple. Your groom speech is a chance to share how much you love your bride, but writing the groom’s speech can be daunting for those who haven’t attended several weddings this year to see them in action. Here’s an easy format you can follow to write the perfect groom’s speech for your big day.

WELCOME YOUR GUESTS

Start off your speech by welcoming those who have come to help you celebrate your marriage. Thank them for coming to share this special day with you and your new wife. You can give specific welcomes, but try to stick to the basic categories: friends and family.  Sometimes is may be ideal to start out with a joke to break the ice, have a look at some of our funny examples .

THANK THOSE WHO HELPED

In this section, you’ll want to thank those who have had a significant role in making your wedding a reality. This includes those who funded the wedding (though this doesn’t need to be stated aloud during the speech), parents, supporters, the Best Man, and the Maid of Honor . You can also thank anyone in your life who had a large role in supporting your relationship before your engagement. Is there someone who introduced the two of you? A married couple that mentored you during your relationship? A community that you both belong to that supported your relationship? These people helped make your wedding happen, so take a moment to thank them publicly.

  • The Ultimate Guide to Wedding Speeches & Toasts . Our go-to guide.
  • Groom’s Speech.  Deliver an amazing Groom wedding speech. Groom speech examples .
  • Best Man Speech.  Create an awesome best man speech. Example best man speeches .
  • Father of the Bride Speech .  A heartfelt father of bride speech. Example father speeches .
  • Sample Toasts & Speech Quotes . One liners, funny quotes, love parables and much more.
  • Recent Wedding Speech Posts . Latest blog posts about wedding speeches and toasts.

ADDRESS YOUR WEDDING PARTY

Take a brief moment to thank and acknowledge each groomsman and bridesmaid. Even just calling each one by name and thanking them for helping your big day run smoothly is enough. Everyone likes to be recognized.

FAWN OVER YOUR LADY

At this time, you can look your bride in the eyes and share how much she means to you. This part of the speech can be made very personal, and is intended to make your bride feel loved and adored in front of all of your guests. Remember to include aspects of her physical beauty as well as her character and what makes you love her. You can be sappy or you can remain more formal, but remember not to lean too far in one direction. Too formal, and it won’t feel natural and true. Too sappy, and everyone will be rolling their eyes by the end of it, including your bride.

INTRODUCE YOURSELVES AS A MARRIED COUPLE

After you’ve talked about how great your blushing bride is, you have the chance to tell everyone present what you are as a couple. You can share a meaningful or funny story, describe how you met, and talk about how she has changed your life since meeting her. You can talk about how you look forward to growing with her over the years, or share a value the two of you intend to base your lives on. If you share a religious affiliation, this is a good time to bring that up if you intend to make it the basis of your shared life. This is the first time you get to introduce yourselves as a married couple, so think about how you want to represent your new marriage to your guests.

FAWN OVER YOUR LADY…AGAIN

You’ll want to end your speech by talking once more about how much you love your bride. This is the day to celebrate how much you love her, so take every opportunity to do that! You don’t need to drag the speech on, but make sure the last thing you say is about how much you love your wife.

WHAT NOT TO SAY

Almost as important as what you do include in your speech is what you choose to leave out. Obviously, you’ll want to leave out any profanity, but make sure these don’t make it into your final speech either:

Delivery Tips

  • Over-used cliches. Unless it’s one that really speaks to your relationship, try to keep it original.
  • Excessive thank-yous. Thank the important figures in your relationship, but it’s not necessary to thank every person who helped with the wedding in a small way.
  • Innuendos or sexual remarks. This should go without saying, but keep it PG for the sake of your bride’s conservative grandmother.

Even the most experienced public speaker can get flustered at the thought of speaking at his own wedding, so it’s normal to feel nervous about the speech. Keep these points in mind to make sure your speech is well-received and natural:

  • Practice, practice, practice. The more you go over your speech beforehand, the more comfortable it will be to give it. You don’t need to feel pressured to memorize it, but make sure you can give the whole speech without reading straight from your notes
  • Look your bride in the eye. Don’t stare her down the whole time you speak, but you should make intentional eye contact while you’re talking about how much you love her.
  • Use tasteful humor to keep a lighter mood. Sharing a funny story or telling a short joke can put your guests at ease and make the whole speech feel more conversational.
  • Keep it brief. Choose your words carefully and intentionally to avoid dragging on your speech. A short but meaningful speech is easier to deliver than a long speech that is full of verbal fluff.

Most importantly, remember that the speech you give at your wedding won’t be the only thing people remember. As long as your bride can tell that you love her from your speech, nothing else matters.

  • PRO Courses Guides New Tech Help Pro Expert Videos About wikiHow Pro Upgrade Sign In
  • EDIT Edit this Article
  • EXPLORE Tech Help Pro About Us Random Article Quizzes Request a New Article Community Dashboard This Or That Game Popular Categories Arts and Entertainment Artwork Books Movies Computers and Electronics Computers Phone Skills Technology Hacks Health Men's Health Mental Health Women's Health Relationships Dating Love Relationship Issues Hobbies and Crafts Crafts Drawing Games Education & Communication Communication Skills Personal Development Studying Personal Care and Style Fashion Hair Care Personal Hygiene Youth Personal Care School Stuff Dating All Categories Arts and Entertainment Finance and Business Home and Garden Relationship Quizzes Cars & Other Vehicles Food and Entertaining Personal Care and Style Sports and Fitness Computers and Electronics Health Pets and Animals Travel Education & Communication Hobbies and Crafts Philosophy and Religion Work World Family Life Holidays and Traditions Relationships Youth
  • Browse Articles
  • Learn Something New
  • Quizzes Hot
  • This Or That Game New
  • Train Your Brain
  • Explore More
  • Support wikiHow
  • About wikiHow
  • Log in / Sign up
  • Education and Communications
  • Communication Skills
  • Public Speaking

How to Write a Wedding Speech

Last Updated: January 4, 2024 Fact Checked

This article was co-authored by Jenny Yi . Jenny Yi is the Founder of Chloe+Mint, an award-winning full service event planning company that specializes in wedding planning, design and floral design. Jenny has been in the industry for over 5 years, and also works closely with notable brands and celebrities on branding and events. There are 7 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources. This article has been viewed 599,764 times.

For most people, their wedding day will be among the most important days of their lives. As such, it is customary for a close friend or loved one to deliver a speech congratulating the newlyweds on their union. This can be a nerve-wracking prospect if you’re the one called upon to give a speech in front of a big, expectant crowd. As the speechwriter, it will pay off to make sure that you’re organized, keep it concise and practice extensively beforehand.

Things You Should Know

Professional wedding planner Jenny Yi says the wedding speech should be “impactful, short, and sweet.” Explain how you know the bride and groom, share a quick backstory on how they met, then wish them well as a couple.

Sample Speeches

how to write a good groom wedding speech

Writing a Meaningful Speech

Step 1 Introduce yourself to the crowd.

  • The best man and maid of honor are usually each asked to make a short speech on behalf of the wedding party. After that, the microphone is sometimes turned over to whoever would like to say a few words.
  • Saying your name and briefly summarizing your history with the bride or groom will be enough. Don’t talk about yourself too much. Remember, the focus of your speech is the married couple.

Step 2 Open with a joke.

  • Use jokes judiciously to break the initial tension and keep the crowd relaxed. Try not to let your speech turn into a stand up comedy routine.
  • Keep your humorous stories and remarks appropriate. There will be people of all ages in your audience, including children.
  • Funny stories might include a funny story about the bride and groom's meeting, or an anecdote about one of them as a child.

Step 3 Share memories of the bride and groom.

  • Sharing unique memories or stories is much more effective than simply complimenting the bride or groom because it is a more personal touch.

Step 4 Offer advice or well-wishes for the future.

  • If you decide to use a quote for this segment of the speech, make sure it is short, relevant and not a cliche.

Step 5 Thank everyone in attendance.

  • Acknowledging the people who helped make the wedding festivities possible will make you appear humble, as well as making them feel appreciated.
  • Express your gratitude in a couple sentences. There’s no need to go on and on thanking every person individually by name.

Making Sure You're Prepared

Step 1 Write the speech well in advance.

  • Treat your speech like you would a school assignment. Compose several drafts, check it for errors and have a friend proofread it to make sure it sounds good.

Step 2 Know when you’re expect to deliver the speech.

  • Familiarize yourself with the order of presentation if multiple speeches are to be given.
  • Don’t spend the entire ceremony fretting over your speech. If you’re sufficiently prepared, you won’t need to give it a second thought until it’s time for you to deliver it.

Step 3 Practice, practice, practice.

  • Know your speech word for word, but try not to sound like you’re simply reciting it from memory. Pace yourself and give every passage emphasis, emotion and clarity.

Step 4 Bring your notes with you.

  • Put your entire speech on a couple note cards rather than a several large sheets of paper. Not only will this look better, it will help you keep your speech at the appropriate length.
  • Only look at your notes if you draw a blank or forget the next part. This will allow you to keep your eyes up and engage your audience. Even the most riveting speech will be a bore if the person giving it is reading off a note card the whole time.

Giving the Speech

Step 1 Maintain your composure.

  • Take a few slow, deep breaths. Think about what you’re saying and shut out all other distractions. Imagine that you’re giving your speech to one person instead of a room full of people.
  • Have a drink or two if it helps your nerves. Just don’t have too many—you want to be focused and clear-headed when it’s time for you to take the floor.

Step 2 Keep it short and sweet.

  • It’s perfectly okay to give a short speech. Simply say a few kind words, raise a toast and hand back the microphone.
  • Speak slowly and deliberately. It’s easy to start chattering too fast when you’re nervous. By talking slower than you feel like you need to, you’ll probably be going at just the right speed.
  • People who are underprepared or extremely anxious tend to talk aimlessly. Avoid this by sticking to what you’ve written and look to the crowd for cues about when their attention is evaporating.

Step 3 Be sincere.

  • Take a moment to speak to the bride and/or groom directly.
  • It’s normal to get a little choked up! As long as you can finish your speech, there’s no need to worry. It may even be flattering, as it will show the people you’re talking about how much you truly care.

Step 4 Finish with a toast.

  • It’s customary for the best man or groomsmen to toast the bride, and the maid of honor to toast the groom.

Expert Q&A

Jenny Yi

  • Keep quotes to a minimum, as other people's words can distract from what you're trying to say yourself. Thanks Helpful 2 Not Helpful 1
  • If you're stumped on how your speech should flow, approach it the way you would a story: give it a beginning, middle and end. Thanks Helpful 0 Not Helpful 1
  • Ask an honest, objective friend to give you feedback on your speech after you've finished writing it. Thanks Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0

how to write a good groom wedding speech

  • Never use a premade template you find on the internet to write a wedding speech. Your speech should be a product of your own unique thoughts, feelings and experiences. Thanks Helpful 6 Not Helpful 1
  • Don't drink too much before delivering your speech. Thanks Helpful 5 Not Helpful 1
  • Leave out especially embarrassing or offensive anecdotes. These are usually considered bad form. You're supposed to be honoring the married couple, not getting a laugh at their expense. Thanks Helpful 6 Not Helpful 3

You Might Also Like

Write a Speech Introducing Yourself

  • ↑ http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2110745/Lost-words-Top-tips-write-winning-wedding-speech-deliver-like-pro.html
  • ↑ https://www.theknot.com/content/wedding-toasting-tips-for-the-maid-of-honor
  • ↑ https://www.presentationmagazine.com/the-structure-and-etiquette-of-wedding-speeches-1041.htm
  • ↑ http://www.artofmanliness.com/2008/07/22/how-to-write-deliver-good-best-man-speech/
  • ↑ https://www.theknot.com/content/wedding-toasting-tips-for-the-maid-of-honor/
  • ↑ https://finley-h.schools.nsw.gov.au/content/dam/doe/sws/schools/f/finley-h/localcontent/how_to_write_a_speech.pdf
  • ↑ https://mediacenter.toastmasters.org/2014-07-01-10-Tips-for-the-Perfect-Wedding-Toast

About This Article

Jenny Yi

To write a wedding speech, start by introducing yourself and explaining how you know the bride and groom. Then, share some fond memories, like stories from when you were kids or how you met. Next, offer well-wishes to the bride and groom, such as wishing them health, happiness, and prosperity. Alternatively, try opening with a joke or funny anecdote, but make sure that your remarks are appropriate for everyone in attendance. Finally, briefly thank everyone for coming and for making the celebration possible. For tips on how to memorize your speech so that it doesn’t sound rehearsed, read on! Did this summary help you? Yes No

  • Send fan mail to authors

Reader Success Stories

Brianna Carl

Brianna Carl

Feb 1, 2017

Did this article help you?

how to write a good groom wedding speech

Sep 16, 2016

Mady Schlosser

Mady Schlosser

Jun 22, 2017

Lindsay Hilman

Lindsay Hilman

Jun 10, 2017

Abz Kagwa

Oct 28, 2016

Am I a Narcissist or an Empath Quiz

Featured Articles

Make a Balsamic Reduction

Trending Articles

How to Take the Perfect Thirst Trap

Watch Articles

Wrap a Round Gift

  • Terms of Use
  • Privacy Policy
  • Do Not Sell or Share My Info
  • Not Selling Info

wikiHow Tech Help Pro:

Level up your tech skills and stay ahead of the curve

The Abbey

How to write a Groom’s wedding speech

Nail your nerves and craft a groom’s speech that’ll blow your wedding guests away.

As a groom, what makes the perfect wedding speech? Should you be funny like the best man? Emotional like the maid of honour ? Or pull the heart strings like the father of the bride? Well, the answer is, a little bit of each would be ideal! With some admin thrown in. Unlike many of the other wedding speeches being given on the day, the groom’s speech is basically one big thank you. There’s no set things you should say, no style it has to be written in, or reaction it needs to receive. Essentially, you just have to praise and complement those closest to you for all their hard work ( and money ), while thanking the assembled guests for being there. Easy, right…?

If you’re not used to speaking in public, or you’re unsure of exactly how to lay out your speech, don’t worry. We’ve put together some easy-to-follow tips that’ll help you write the perfect groom speech for your wedding day.

The people you need to thank

As mentioned, the groom’s speech is all about thanking friends and family who were involved in putting the wedding together. Alongside that, it’s nice to also welcome the other side of the family, as well as remembering those who couldn’t be there on the day. Suppliers too, if you feel they played a really significant part in your day being a success, share the ones who deserve a special mention. You never know, it could lead to one of your loved ones hiring your wedding photographer for their big day.

Give your speech structure

It could be tempting to just run head first towards all those thank-yous, desperately trying not to miss anyone out. This approach, although potentially fun to watch, will seem quite chaotic and almost certainly lead to you missing important members of the wedding party out. Instead, organise your thoughts, and create an outline. You don’t need to write your groom’s speech out and follow it word by word on the wedding day. But you should have bullet notes you can (mentally) tick off as you go. Here’s a simple outline that will work for most groom speeches: · Introduce yourself, and say a few words about the day so far. · Welcome everyone, and thank them for coming · Thank specific people involved in the wedding. · Share a personal anecdote or story about your wedding planning journey, or relationship. · Share how you feel about your spouse. · Thank everyone for coming again and let guests know any information the venue has given you. Food or bar times, when certain events will be, that sort of thing. · Raise a toast.

Keep it light, but don’t force humour

We’re not all blessed with a funny bone. If you’re someone who’s never been the joker in the pack, the wisecracker in the group. Don’t force yourself to be one during your groom’s speech, on your wedding day! Your guests know you, they love you, and they want to hear a speech that sounds like it came from you, not Seinfeld. However, if making a joke here and there is part of your personality, by all means, use humour in your speech. But it’s important to strike a balance between laughs and sentiment. Guests should get a sense of how serious you are about the day, and feel your emotions. And they can’t do that if you’re just delivering a stand-up routine. Keep wedding guests interested and engaged in your groom’s speech by bouncing back and forth between playfulness and sentimentality. Jokes, interspersed with more serious, and emotional parts, is the key to a successful groom’s speech.

How long should a Groom’s wedding speech be?

The secret to any good speech is to keep it short and sweet. However humorous, or emotional your groom’s speech is, wedding guests will soon start to nod off if it goes on too long. Likewise, if you only share a couple of words, there’s no way loved ones will get a sense of how you feel about the day, or their contribution. Recite, or practice your groom’s speech ahead of the wedding day, multiple times, so you know how long it is. And remember that nervous energy will potentially take over on the day, speeding up the whole speech , and shaving off 30 seconds from the total time. Another reason why it’s important to practice. Overall, on your wedding day, aim to keep your groom’s speech around 2–3 minutes long. In that time, you should be able to convey just how delighted and thankful you truly are. Without sending any older relatives off to sleep! We hope we have inspired your groom’s speech, and hopefully settled some nerves ahead of the wedding day! It would be a pleasure to guide you further, and introduce you to our lovely wedding venue in Co Kildare. The Abbey is only an hour away from Dublin, and has an 18th century chapel on-site, a stunning ballroom, multiple events spaces and 38 contemporary style rooms. You are welcome to have a browse of our wedding venue online , and if you like what you see, please get in touch via our contact page to book a viewing. And while you wait for your visit, you can find out more about us via our online brochure .

To revisit this article, visit My Profile, then View saved stories .

How to Write—And Deliver—The Perfect Wedding Speech

By Shelby Wax

How to Write a Perfect Wedding Speech

We may earn a commission if you buy something from any affiliate links on our site.

If one of your nearest and dearest is tying the knot, it’s possible you may be asked to give a speech during the wedding festivities. And while having an opportunity to share your love and memories at a major milestone event is an honor, there’s no denying that it’s a big ask—especially if public speaking isn’t your forté. A wedding speech presents a unique challenge: There’s no set formula for how the speech should play out, but it often requires sentimentality, a touch of humor, and the good sense to know when to wrap it up.

Are you a member of the wedding party that wants to (or has been asked to) give a toast at an upcoming celebration? Read ahead to learn how to write and prepare for your big moment.

Who Gives a Wedding Speech?

Image may contain Housing Building Architecture House Villa Person Adult Dress Clothing Formal Wear and People

First off, it’s important to make sure that the couple definitely wants you to give a toast at their celebrations. Traditionally, the maid of honor, best man, and parents of the couple will give a speech at the wedding. However, the couple should explicitly ask these guests well in advance to give a speech so they have plenty of time to prepare. They may also choose additional wedding party members to give toasts at the reception or pre-wedding parties; but if the couple has not asked you to give a speech, do not prepare one. Speeches are carefully placed into a wedding timeline so the day will stay on schedule, and an additional five minutes could cut into strategically timed moments of the celebration.

The to-be-weds also have the right to curate the day as they wish, and occasionally at a rehearsal dinner or welcome party, the couple may open the floor to additional toasts. But if this doesn’t happen, grabbing the mic unexpectedly for an off-the-cuff speech (especially after a few glasses of wine) will not be appreciated.

How to Write a Wedding Speech

How to Write a Perfect Wedding Speech

If you are asked to give a toast, it’s important that you don’t just wing it. “First, recognize that speechwriting is a creative process,” shares Allison Shapira, founder and CEO of Global Public Speaking . “Give yourself plenty of time to be creative (i.e. not the night before, when you already have so much to stress about). Wait for your most creative time of the day, and turn off any distractions. Spend some unrushed time thinking about your relationship to the couple, and what you’d like to say.”

While there’s no exact template to follow, there is a good basic formula to adhere to. “The framework I recommend for a wedding speech is: story, message, blessing,” she shares. “Tell a heartwarming story, share the message or value behind that story, and then offer a blessing or wish for the couple based on that message.”

“Typically, we advise our speakers to try to bring the audience on a journey where you initially try to make them laugh, then get to the real depth of the speech and earn some tears, then bring the whole speech full circle with a deep insight or story about the couple that ends with a funny final punch,” shares Steven Greitzer, CEO and founder of Provenance , an AI company that specializes in helping write personalized wedding vows, ceremonies, and toasts. “It’s important to have a good balance of humor and sentimentality because, if it’s a full roast, it can feel like you’re just doing a standup comedy show for your own benefit and it could lack substance. Or, if it’s too overly emotional, it can get heavy and perhaps a bit too somber for a wedding celebration.”

When choosing a story, Shapira recommends reading the room. “It should obviously be good-natured, without making anyone look bad. And, it all depends on the family dynamics,” she says. “What one family considers good-natured, another family could consider scathing. Choose someone in the audience whom you think could give you some helpful feedback, and practice the speech with them in advance.”

How to Write a Perfect Wedding Speech

By Elise Taylor

The Best Drugstore Mascara, Endorsed by Editors and Makeup Artists

By Kiana Murden

First Comes Hailey Bieber, Then Comes the Street Style Scene! Red Footwear Is in for Spring

By Laura Jackson

Greitzer adds that it's important that both members of the couple are highlighted in the speech. “Great anecdotes showcase who each person was before meeting, their synergy together, and their individual and collective growth,” he shares. If you don’t know one member of the couple very well, don’t be afraid to get creative. “One of the best speeches I’ve seen was from a bridesmaid who hadn’t really been able to spend too much time with her best friend’s fiance because of the pandemic,” Greitzer shares. “She creatively read texts she found in her phone that gave her a hilarious timeline of her friend falling in love.”

If you’re still not sure where to begin, consider giving an AI platform a try to help you form your toast. “The Provenance tools guide speakers to create unique, and personal ceremonies, vows, and toasts without the stress. It’s a partner in your brainstorming process; a way to help you verbalize what you were trying to say—but faster,” explains Greitzer. “Instead of being some outdated, mad-libs-style template, the expert-curated prompts inspire special stories and insights, ultimately weaving your responses together into a custom, editable first draft.”

A final writing tip from Shapira? “I definitely recommend creating an outline but do not recommend writing the speech out word for word. When we script the entire speech, it sounds too formal,” says the public speaking expert. “I recommend first brainstorming the content, rearranging it into a logical structure, then drafting a general outline which you can bring with you to the event. While it may look better to simply give the speech ‘from the heart,’ the stress involved in trying to memorize your speech is simply not worth it.”

How to Deliver a Wedding Speech

Writing a wedding speech is half the battle—next comes your performance. It’s important that your toast has a good flow, feels natural, and doesn’t drag on. Here’s where the idiom “practice makes perfect” rings true. Shapira advises giving yourself a few weeks of rehearsal to make your speech feel authentic and fluid. Her recommendations? “Read your speech out loud and make sure it stays within the time you have allotted. Read it to someone else and get their feedback. Record it and watch it back. We use a tool called AMPLIFY to get AI-based feedback.” She adds, “Don’t memorize the speech, but do read it out loud and make sure it sounds like your voice.”

The ideal length of a toast is between two to four minutes, which translates to around 500 to 1000 words on a page. Still, Greitzer notes, “The perfect length for the wedding toast complies with whatever length the couple wants it to be. Many guests don’t realize that long speeches can impact the whole evening’s timeline and affect the caterer, DJ, and so much more.”

This image may contain Human Person Electronics Phone Mobile Phone Cell Phone Dance Pose and Leisure Activities

While it’s now common to see toasts being read off a phone, both experts agree that it’s much better to print out your speech. “Reading off of a phone comes with the risk of distractions from notifications, a weird backlight that can affect the color of your face in photos, finicky technical difficulties, and having that annoying sound interference with the mic,” says Greitzer. (You also should make sure your speech is legible with a large font and wide spacing so you can easily find your place.)

The final hurdle of giving a wedding toast is getting over your nerves. “Find a quiet place right beforehand to center yourself (perhaps the bathroom or a corner of the room), pause and breathe, and remind yourself why you care about the couple,” recommends Shapira. She also adds—perhaps unsurprisingly—that it’s best to hold back on alcohol consumption ahead of the toast. “No one expects a perfect or professional speech; they want a unique, authentic message. The speech isn’t about you—it’s about the couple. Once you reframe the fact that the center of attention isn’t on you, you can relax.”

How to Write a Perfect Wedding Speech

More Great Living Stories From Vogue

Naomi Biden on Her White House Wedding

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle Hold Hands in Two Never-Before-Seen Portraits

Kim Kardashian Gives a Tour of Her Most-Cherished Home Objects

The Best Celebrity Wedding Moments in Vogue

The Most Unusual Celebrity Baby Names : Y, Gravity, Pilot Inspektor, and More

Sign up for Vogue ’s wedding newsletter , an all-access invitation to the exceptional and inspirational, plus planning tips and advice

Vogue Weddings

By signing up you agree to our User Agreement (including the class action waiver and arbitration provisions ), our Privacy Policy & Cookie Statement and to receive marketing and account-related emails from Architectural Digest.. You can unsubscribe at any time. This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.

Easy, peasy: How to write a groom’s wedding speech

For those grooms fretting about writing their wedding speeches, don’t. Believe it or not, there’s nothing to fear.

Your groom’s speech is actually quite an easy task, after all, the crowd will be on your side; your partner is definitely going to back you and, well, you’re the groom, so you can’t really put a foot wrong on your wedding day, can you?

To start with, there are really only two things you need to do in your groom’s speech: thank people and talk about your new spouse (and your new life). Of course, peppering your speech with jokes is a bonus that always ties the whole thing together nicely.

Follow this basic formula and you really can’t go wrong. Add a dollop of creativity, a smattering of good humour and a little imagination – and expect a rousing ovation.

Thanking people Thanking people is easy – and the right thing to do. Weddings are never the result of just one or two people’s efforts. Tally up the names of the people who’ve contributed to your big day and thank them for their contributions.

Of course, your thanks should extend to the people in your life who’ve helped you and your new partner over the years too, people such as parents, siblings and dear friends etc.

Don’t just say ‘Thank You’ and list the people who’ve helped. You can make this portion of your speech a little more entertaining by giving a short one-line story about each individual or discussing their contribution and how much it helped the two of you in the run-up to your wedding day.

Thank as many people individually as you need to but try not to make this part go so long that it starts to become uncomfortable.

Regardless of who you thank, don’t forget to thank your new partner. Thanking them is typically, the climax of a groom’s speech and the point you make your wedding toast, so build up to it.

When you thank your new spouse, obviously do more than just say ‘Thank You’. Weave in a lovely story or two and express your feelings for her at this pivotal moment in your life.

Talking about your partner Whether you join this portion of your speech with thanking your love, the best way to figure out what you want to say is simply to jot down the first few thoughts that come to mind.

It sounds corny but speak from your heart. Don’t try to be overly romantic or to steal lines from songs or movies. Just write down your initial thoughts and it will start to take shape.

Once you have your basic thoughts down, start editing it.

Read it back to yourself out loud and you’ll start to remember things, moments, quotes etc. Avoid too many inside references as most of your guests won’t understand them, but unless you’re dead against public declarations of affection, just ensure your words express how much you love her. It really is that simple.

The groom’s wedding speech doesn’t need to comprise of Shakespearean prose or grandiose declaration of your affections. While this is nice if you can pull it off, your speech just needs to be simple and sincere.

If you’re still stuck, consider incorporating the following tid bids:

– Talk about how you first met. – Mention the little things that you think about when you think of her. – Bring up funny or sentimental stories about events that occurred early in your relationship, particularly if they are amusing.

Making jokes Don’t worry too much about this one if it doesn’t come naturally. Remember the audience is already on your side, so if you don’t consider yourself someone who can ‘do funny’, you don’t need to do it.

If you are someone who can ‘do funny,’ keep it simple and, particularly if parents or children are present, try to keep it clean. Of course, you know your audience best and how far you can push it, but while your mates might find the odd rude joke hilarious, your new parents-in-law, may not.

The best way to write a successful groom’s wedding speech really is to just relax and let it flow naturally. Speak the truth and speak from your heart and you can’t go wrong.

Nobody is going to make fun of you and nobody is going to think badly of you.

You and your spouse are the stars of your wedding day  – and everybody is there to celebrate it with you, not judge you on your public speaking skills!

Need some inspiration? Check out this fantastic groom’s wedding speech which was sung!

Suppliers in the Spotlight

Find Your Suppliers

Share this article on Facebook

Find Suppliers

80% of Australian couples use Easy Weddings to connect with their dream wedding suppliers. Browse the directory and start planning today!

Wedding Venues

Wedding Venues

Where most couples begin

Wedding Dresses

Wedding Dresses

Imagine walking down the aisle

Wedding Cars

Photography

Wedding Hair & Makeup

Hair & Makeup

Marriage Celebrant

Marriage Celebrant

Wedding Decorations

Decorations

Wedding Flowers

Related Articles

Long sleeve wedding dresses and styles Fame Park Studios

Long-sleeved wedding dresses we love right now

Benn Stone

Get to Know Benn Stone: Melbourne Cityside Celebrant

Melrose Events Tullamarine

Celebrate in style: Melrose Events Tullamarine

Herbivore Florals

Wedding arbour ideas from real florists

Hi! I'm Chelsea and I can help you find suppliers for your wedding. Would you like some help today?

Chelseabot

The Tech Edvocate

  • Advertisement
  • Home Page Five (No Sidebar)
  • Home Page Four
  • Home Page Three
  • Home Page Two
  • Icons [No Sidebar]
  • Left Sidbear Page
  • Lynch Educational Consulting
  • My Speaking Page
  • Newsletter Sign Up Confirmation
  • Newsletter Unsubscription
  • Page Example
  • Privacy Policy
  • Protected Content
  • Request a Product Review
  • Shortcodes Examples
  • Terms and Conditions
  • The Edvocate
  • The Tech Edvocate Product Guide
  • Write For Us
  • Dr. Lynch’s Personal Website
  • The Edvocate Podcast
  • Assistive Technology
  • Child Development Tech
  • Early Childhood & K-12 EdTech
  • EdTech Futures
  • EdTech News
  • EdTech Policy & Reform
  • EdTech Startups & Businesses
  • Higher Education EdTech
  • Online Learning & eLearning
  • Parent & Family Tech
  • Personalized Learning
  • Product Reviews
  • Tech Edvocate Awards
  • School Ratings

4 Easy Ways to Get Verified on Dating Apps

3 ways to tell if bread is 100 percent whole wheat, 3 ways to avoid falling too hard for someone, how to heal a scratched cornea, 12 easy ways to prove your worth at work, how to use command blocks in minecraft, 5 simple ways to connect two monitors to a laptop, 5 ways to look hot without make up, 4 easy ways to set healthy boundaries in marriage, how to become a wet nurse, how to write a rehearsal dinner speech.

how to write a good groom wedding speech

Introduction:

Rehearsal dinners are a time for the wedding party, family and friends to come together and celebrate before the big day. Often, someone who is playing an integral part in the wedding will give a speech at this event to express gratitude and well-wishes for the couple. Writing a rehearsal dinner speech may seem daunting, but with these tips and tricks, you’ll be prepared to deliver an unforgettable and meaningful message.

1. Know Your Purpose:

Before you start writing, it’s crucial to understand the purpose of your speech. Is it to honor the couple, thank the hosts, or share personal anecdotes that celebrate their journey? Knowing your goal will give your rehearsal dinner speech focus and make it easier to write.

2. Keep It Brief:

Rehearsal dinners are typically more relaxed than wedding receptions, so maintain a conversational tone throughout your speech. Aim to speak for just a few minutes – under five minutes is ideal – so you don’t lose the attention of your audience. Remember that less is often more when it comes to getting your message across effectively.

3. Start with a Strong Opening:

A great way to begin your rehearsal dinner speech is by giving a warm welcome or sharing a light-hearted joke or story to engage your audience. This sets the tone for what’s ahead while simultaneously breaking the ice and building rapport with listeners.

4. Share Personal Stories:

Recounting personal stories or anecdotes is an excellent way to highlight the couple’s qualities and share your bond with them. Share specific instances that reflect how they’ve grown individually and as a couple, but keep in mind that these stories should be light-hearted, fun, and family-appropriate.

5. Include Gratitude:

Take a moment in your speech to acknowledge some key people involved in planning this special occasion. Thank the hosts for organizing such a lovely event and give credit to the bride and groom for their hard work in putting together their wedding celebration. Showing gratitude adds a touch of sincerity to your speech and helps create a positive atmosphere.

6. Offer Well-Wishes:

Before concluding, share a few heartfelt lines about your hopes and wishes for the couple’s future together. You could include anecdotes, quotes, or advice about love relationships and partnerships that inspire you. Express this with sincerity so that your message resonates with the couple and everyone present at the event.

7. End on a Toast:

The perfect way to wrap up your rehearsal dinner speech is with a toast to the couple. Raise your glass, encourage everyone else in attendance to do likewise, and end with a few simple heartfelt words that celebrate the bride and groom.

Conclusion:

Writing a memorable rehearsal dinner speech is all about finding the right balance between humor, sentimentality, and structure. Follow these guidelines, inject your unique spin, and you’re sure to deliver a touching tribute that will be remembered fondly by all who hear it.

3 Simple Ways to Report Dangerous Driving ...

How to write an opinion piece.

' src=

Matthew Lynch

Related articles more from author.

how to write a good groom wedding speech

How to Speak Hindi

how to write a good groom wedding speech

3 Ways to Welcome New People

how to write a good groom wedding speech

3 Ways to Calm an Aggressive Dog

how to write a good groom wedding speech

4 Effective Ways to Improve at Physics

how to write a good groom wedding speech

How to Care for Poinsettias

how to write a good groom wedding speech

5 Ways to Stay Cool in Warm Weather

Bored Panda

Wedding Gets Ruined By The Bride’s Twin Who Just Couldn’t Let Her Sister Shine For One Day

Wedding speeches are a common tradition and an essential part of the reception. They’re a great way for the couple and the guests to express love and gratitude for each other and can set the tone for a wholesome, fun, and memorable evening.

However, this bride’s sister used such a precious moment to make it all about herself. During her speech, she unexpectedly took out a love letter that the groom wrote to her when they were in the 8th grade.

Read further to find the full story and a conversation with wedding vow and speech writer Katelyn Peterson who kindly agreed to tell us what speakers should avoid to save everyone some unnecessary awkwardness .

A wedding speech is a great way to express love and gratitude

Image credits: Arjun adinata / pexels (not the actual photo)

However, this bride’s sister used it to make it all about herself

Image credits: Pixabay / pexels (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Stephanie Lima / pexels (not the actual photo)

Image credits: anon

The author provided more information in the comments

While including a few jokes in a wedding speech is fine, you don’t want to cross any lines.

Usually, wedding speeches should be short and sweet. While including a few jokes in it is totally fine, you don’t want to cross any lines and make everyone uncomfortable.

Bored Panda contacted wedding vow and speech writer Katelyn Peterson, who kindly agreed to share some things to avoid while making a toast on such an occasion.

She advised, “Skip any words or topics that you’d feel awkward sharing in front of your own grandparents. Save those anecdotes for the bachelor or bachelorette party.

And remember that brevity is key. Shorter speeches will have a greater impact than longer ones. Keep your stories short and your message tight. Guests will thank you for it!”

Peterson mentions that a common mistake people make is not putting enough effort into preparation. “Don’t procrastinate drafting your toast. Start four to eight weeks before the wedding. Begin by jotting down general ideas, stories, and key points. Then, spend most of your time editing those notes into a seamless speech.

Be sure to practice reciting your speech out loud several times before the wedding. Most people aren’t naturally gifted public speakers, so focus on the delivery just as much as the content of your speech. Remember to speak slowly and loudly and to vary your tone for maximum emotional impact.”

When asked what the couple should do when a guest has delivered a souring monologue, she told us, “The best way to handle a crisis is to avoid one. If your chosen speaker is known for creating awkward tension, choose someone else to give the wedding toast. You can also ask them to send their speeches to the wedding planner so she can vet all the toasts. ”

Things to definitely avoid while making a wedding speech

Image credits: Mario Schafer / pexels (not the actual photo)

One doesn’t have to be proficient in writing or public speaking, but whatever they say has to be sincere and somewhat original. To master the fine line between humor, wholeheartedness, and sentiment, writer Andie Eisen from Coveteur also lists a few things to avoid saying in a wedding speech.

She recommends refraining from making it about yourself, no matter how tempting it is to talk about decades of your friendship with the bride or groom. Make sure that the main subject of your speech is them, not you. “Regardless of your fumbles or nerves, heartfelt emotion and a few cheeky jokes will go a long way for the happy couple,” she adds.

Something else Eisen mentions is knowing where to edit and cut things that may be inappropriate for this occasion. In general, the inclusion of personal stories might not be a good idea. Unless they have an arc, a twist, and a good ending, it’s better to avoid talking about the time the bride got wasted in Amsterdam. If you still wish to go along with it, ensure it shows off their good qualities, not only embarrassment.

Some extra advice from her is not to get too drunk and keep it PG-13. Eisen emphasizes that having a drink beforehand can be good to calm the nerves, as some people could really benefit from it. But knowing your limits is important, and no matter how anxiety-inducing it might be, don’t go toasting shattered. This probably won’t look good, and you risk coming off as disrespectful and irresponsible. As for swear words or “grown-up jokes,” she recommends being aware of the audience. For everyone’s sake, keep the funny bits classy and PG-13.

To round this off, some general topics that should be avoided in a wedding toast include:

  • Bride or groom’s ex-partners
  • Engagement or new baby announcement
  • Referring to marriage as a trap
  • Mentioning that you dated the bride/groom first
  • Talking about your own wedding
  • Betting on how long the couple will last
  • Calling it a “shotgun” event

Image credits: Al Elmes / pexels (not the actual photo)

Commenters expressed their surprise and even called her a jealous witch

Wedding Gets Ruined By The Bride’s Twin Who Just Couldn’t Let Her Sister Shine For One Day

Zola wants to bring the wedding industry into the 21st century

how to write a good groom wedding speech

Welcome back to Found, where we get the stories behind the startups.

This week Becca and Dom are joined by Shan-Lyn Ma, the co-founder and CEO of Zola, an online platform for wedding planning and gift registries. Ma talked about why she decided to launch the business after trying to buy a gift for a friend and realizing that wedding registries were still living in the past. Ma also spoke about:

  • How the company has listened to its customers and evolved to offer new features its clients are requesting.
  • How Zola navigated through the pandemic, which completely disrupted the wedding industry.
  • How AI can be incorporated into the wedding process.
  • Why Ma had always wanted to be an entrepreneur.

In the outro, Becca and Dom dive into some of the questions that remained after the conversation, such as how Zola stands out from an increasing competitive field or how its handled controversy in the past such as when the company was asked to remove slate plantations venues from its marketplace. The hosts also got into the company’s fundraising history and whether or not they’d be offended by an AI-generated thank-you note.

Subscribe to Found to hear more stories from founders each week.

Connect with us:

Here’s the full transcript, which has been edited for clarity.

Becca Szkutak: Hello, and welcome to Found, TechCrunch’s podcast that brings you the stories behind the startups from the folks that are building them. It’s me your host, Becca Szkutak, and I’m joined, as always, by the mysterious, the lovely, Dominic-Madori Davis. Hey, Dom how’s it going?

Dominic-Madori Davis: I’m hanging in there. What about you?

BS: I feel like I’m also hanging in there. But something that will maybe pull us through is today’s amazing episode that we have for you, dear readers. So if you also feel like you’re just hanging in there, maybe this will brighten your day. Maybe it won’t. Who knows? Today we have on Shan-Lyn Ma, the co-founder and CEO of wedding registry and planning site Zola.

DMD: Yes, we had an amazing conversation with her. And as always, before we get to the episode, we’re going to do two truths and a lie. So listen carefully to see what am I lying about. Okay, so Shan was able to raise a seed round after one conversation. Is that true or not? The idea for Zola came from the need for a usable gift registry. Or is it true or not that Becca used Zola last week? Stay tuned, you gotta listen to the episode. And then afterward, as always, we’re going to reveal what was the lie.

BS: This one is particularly fun. So definitely listen in, and we’ll catch you back at the outro.

Shan-Lyn Ma:  Becca, how are you?

BS: I am doing well. Happy to have you on the show.

SLM: Thank you so much for having me. Fan of the pod.

BS: Very timely, too . . . we’ll dive into this in a second. But I am actually going to a wedding. Not this Saturday. But next Saturday and my friend set everything up on Zola. So I think probably the perfect place to dive in. Why don’t you start by telling us a little about the company?

SLM: Sure. Well, we aim to serve newly engaged couples. From that first day they get engaged through their entire wedding planning journey, everything you have to do in the lead-up and day of the wedding. And then after that into their first years of newlywed life. So we aim to be that one-stop shop where you can do everything you need to do for that big day.

BS: And of course, because I know weddings are obviously something that have a lot of cultural meaning to them. It’s not necessarily a universal experience. But everyone either goes to weddings or they get married themselves. It does have that universal feel in a lot of ways that some things don’t. How did you get interested in starting a business around it?

SLM: Well, very similar to you, Becca. I had that time in my life where it felt like all my friends were getting married at exactly the same time. It seems like you have that year where you spend every weekend going to a different wedding. It’s a wonderful year, but it’s also very expensive, stressful. And as part of that, you know, going to a lot of friends’ weddings, you end up buying a lot of gifts from their wedding registries. So I was having that year in 2013. That was the year we started Zola. I found myself on my friend’s wedding registries. And my background was I had worked in e-commerce building e-commerce products. And I was on these wedding registry websites. And I thought these are just some of the worst shopping experiences I have ever seen online. At that time the wedding registries were really dominated by the big, traditional department stores and websites or mobile apps were really not their strength or their focus. And so I was talking to my co-founder, Nobu [Nakaguchi], who also has been working in shopping products. And I said, this is terrible. We can do a much better job. And our friends who are the ones getting married really deserve a lot better than this. This is kind of insulting now, Nobu. He’s married; he’s gotten married. He was complaining about it from the couple side. He was saying, yeah, it was. [It] nearly caused a breakup of his fiancée before they even got married. It was so terrible. They had so many fights over it. And so we thought we had the perfect people to work on this, and we can do better. And that was the beginning of Zola.

BS: What was it like going from that idea stage realizing the problem, figuring out the pain point, thinking of how you guys could attack it? What was it like actually building out the company? Because I know Zola does so much more now than just sort of like the registry side. So what has the journey been like of taking that idea and turning it into what we all want? I am going to go on and use this week to buy a wedding gift because I will not forget this time.

SLM: It really started off with [us thinking] . . . this is an interesting idea. But let’s make sure that it’s actually a good idea and when that’s valuable when that’s needed. And so we just tried to find as many people as we could who had either recently gotten married or engaged in planning their weddings, and we ended up going to a lot of coffee shops having a lot of one-on-one coffees, lunches, breakfasts, asking people, “Tell us how you’re thinking about your wedding. What are you excited about? What you’re stressed about? What do you use? Say what’s good and bad about that.” And through these coffee conversations, we found a lot of stress and anxiety, and everyone said the same thing: “I’ve never done this before. This is the first time I’m getting married. I have no idea what to do. But I have a deadline, and just help, please help me and tell me what I should be doing.” And so [we thought]  . . . we could reimagine the wedding registry [and it] expanded into this bigger idea of we could help couples with their entire wedding planning journey; we can start with the registry. But the the industry itself is so antiquated, that it really needs to be disrupted in the same way that every other industry has been with technology. And so through those user conversations, we kind of validated this is a need, this is a pain point. And slowly we started designing a prototype for what would be a better product; we started having these design brainstorming sessions together in my living room, on my coffee table, on the floor. And we would sketch out on pieces of paper these designs, what we thought would be a better user experience, and then put those into an online prototype, go back to the same couples and friends and say, “Okay, based on that conversation, what do you think? Is this what you had in mind? Would you want to use this?” And over that period of a few months, [we] designed what is the basis for Zola today.

DMD: Talking about industry disruption. What was the reception like from the big box retailers? Who just came in there and did their whole thing? What was the reception like in the industry?

SLM: Yeah, I think we were lucky in that we were kind of flying a little bit under the radar, because the big box retailers had a lot going on, and they were being disrupted, and you had people migrating away from traditional department stores [and going] online . . . We were able to build this business, kind of under their noses. I think a few years in, we started to really find product-market fit and brand recognition. Some of these department stores came to us wanting to work together. And we also were interested in how do we offer products from stores that our couples do want, but they don’t necessarily want us to create three different registries at three different stores, just for one wedding. They would rather have that all in one registry. And so can we be that place, but still partner with those stores to offer their products. And today we do have partnerships with some great stores, where their products are only sold at their store as well as Zola.

DMD: And this seems like such an obviously amazing idea that taps into a really pressing need. Did you initially start bootstrapping this? Or did you immediately go to investors and pitch this?

SLM: Well, every founder that I’ve spoken to has always had a very unique fundraising story. And our story of how we initially got our seed funding is no different and that it’s very different. So what happened was Kevin Ryan, who is a well-known New York entrepreneur and investor who had built many successful businesses over the years, including Gilt Groupe, he was someone that Nobu and I had worked with for many years at Gilt where we were joined in the early days and built that on the product side . . . So we were all talking together about this idea for a new weddings company — Nobu and I were talking to Kevin about what we’d heard, what we were interested in doing. And he said to us, “I love this. I’ve always wanted to do something in weddings. I would love to work with you guys. I will give you the seed funding. And let’s just get started.” When I tell people that, they’re like, “Wow, that was so easy. You raised your seed round in a second. I wish I could do that, too.” And what I always say is, “No, Nobu and I worked our butts off for four years, day, night, weekend, 24/7, to prove that we were good enough to be able to have someone to say, ‘Okay, I’ll invest in you in a second.’ And so [it was] both luck and hard work. But that was how we had seed funding to really be able to invest in building the first product, building the MVP, and getting it out there into the world.

BS: And thinking about when you guys got started, a lot has changed since then, because I know even just talking about what you mentioned was sparked the idea of these big box retailers not even being really designed yet for smooth e-commerce transactions, let alone wedding registries. That kind of stuff has all come up to date by this point. Plus this category has gotten more crowded in general. I know there are a couple other venture-backed startups that are also trying to do wedding registries and wedding websites — all a little bit different, but all kind of trying to solve the same problems that you guys set out to as well. What has it been like riding that wave and keeping Zola . . . as a major player in this category? How has it been able to ride the changes that have happened in this space since you guys launched?

SLM: Yeah, so my background, and my co-founder’s background is really around product and product design. And so naturally, we believe that the best product always wins in the market. And what we are very proud of is that even though our wedding registry product has been out there in the world now for 10 years, there is no other player that offers the same things that we do in our very first product that everyone could see and potentially could do the same thing. But for some reason, they just can’t. We let you add products from anywhere, including the Zola store, which you can then decide when you want to ship. We integrate our registry fully into wedding websites into our guest list, invitations and paper. All the things that we’ve built are built in a way that’s a seamless kind of ecosystem of products. I think if you were to look at each product available in a winning space, you would find that really isn’t the case anywhere except for Zola. And so I think the way that we’ve stayed ahead is through product development; day in, day out, we think about what can make the couple’s lives easier and better. We just keep adding on to that day by day, brick by brick, until we see 10 years later, this ecosystem of products that are both wide in terms of breadth, but each product in and of itself is best in class. And each product competes with a different set of competitors but is the winner in that category. And then no one connects these products together like we do.

BS: To stick to the product side for a second, I’m curious how you guys decided to add on to that original idea with the wedding registries. What products made sense to add on, which things were nice to have, but maybe our clients don’t need to have that? I know something I’ve seen in this space is how some companies now do baby showers. You can do a registry for a baby shower or you can book your Lyft for after the wedding through the platform. So people are going off in different branches. I’m definitely curious how you guys decided when and where to expand as you were building out these different products?

SLM: This is an interesting question. Because in the early years, we tried to stay very focused on just let’s make sure where we can really win and get it right in our first product. And so we stayed on that wedding registry product and doing only that 24/7 for four years. But pretty much from day one we find we kept hearing people say, “Well, I love Zola from my registry. If I could just add a few details about my wedding. I could also [use] it as my wedding website. [If it was] both together, then I’d be done. Can you please do that?” And we purposely kind of said, “No, we aren’t doing that right now.” After four years of hearing that we said, “Okay, it’s time we can do that.” So we launched the wedding website, and it was a hit straightaway. It took off out the gate. And so we thought, okay, maybe we shouldn’t wait for years to listen to couples and what they’re telling us they want. I think once we launched that wedding website, we very quickly heard, “I love the design I picked for that website. Could I also just print my save the dates and my invitations in the same design? Because you already have the guest list of the guest list manager. If I could just print it all out, send it, that would be great.” So we did that, actually. We did that very quickly after the wedding website. And similarly by listening to the couples, that turned out to be a runaway success in terms of people wanting to use that. It led to our next product of couples who were saying, “Okay, you have all these older couples. You probably know where they’ve booked their weddings. Which venues should I be considering? Which photographers do people like me like? Which photographers did my friends use?” So that led to probably one of our biggest launches yet, which is our venue and vendor marketplace where couples can find venues where they want to get married or vendors for the day of their wedding from their photographer, caterer, DJ, salon. That marketplace has really been informed by couples, and we see where all the couples have gotten married, and then how can we get those onto Zola so that other couples can see and find where they want to get married faster?

DMD: It’s so interesting, because you’re obviously talking about adapting with the times and moving product really fast. But I remember a few years ago there was something with Color of Change in terms of where someone wanted to throw their weddings and how there’s a lot of sociopolitical weirdness that might come up with weddings these days. So how do you navigate that as a company, when someone wants to get married at a very weird location that they should not be getting married at? How do you say, “Oh, we’re not going to have our users do this, or we’re going to have them do that?”

SLM: So obviously we can’t tell our users or our couples what they can and can’t do on their wedding day, because we can’t control everyone. But we can decide who we want to accept into the Zola vendor marketplace based on a vendor vows. Every vendor that shows up on Zola has to sign up for these vendor vows. And what’s included in those is that vendors must not discriminate against couples based on their race, religion, sexual orientation, you know, all these dimensions that are, frankly, offensive and hurtful and just wrong. So, if someone was to discriminate against a couple on those dimensions, we would not have them on Zola. That has been very important to us and to our team, important to our couples. And we are proud that we were able to say that.

BS: If you want to talk about that a little bit more? I’m curious, because that sounds like a great policy, having people put this commitment forward to be able to use the site and advertising that way and get connected with potential couples. Was that a reaction to something that happened? Or was that something that you guys baked in from the beginning? How did that come to be? Because I definitely agree with Dom, that is something that I feel like we weren’t talking about as much 10 years ago, but now obviously is a much bigger part of the conversation when we’re talking about weddings, and just decisions about events in general, based on where the country’s going, what we’re talking about in the zeitgeist and such. So what how did that decision come to be?

SLM: I think it’s very reflective of Zola culture and values from day one, which was very consciously Nobu. And I said, even before we had launched a single design of Zola, that we want to be inclusive of all couples. One thing that really offended us was that many of the other wedding sites that we looked at would just automatically assume that it was a bride and groom getting married. When you fill out the form to sign up, the default is what’s the bride’s name and what’s the groom’s name. And, of course, that makes no sense. For us, it sounds so obvious now when I say it, but 10 years ago, what no one else was doing that we built in from day one was, let’s not assume who’s getting married. Let’s just ask for names. They can tell us who they are. And the images that we show on the website, we used to show a silhouette. If it was a groom and groom getting married, it would show a silhouette of a groom and groom. I can’t tell you the number of emails and outreach that we got from couples saying, “Thank you so much for not assuming that this is a bride and groom thing.” We tried to weave that inclusive value throughout the entire user experience from the very beginning and continue to do so in every product that we launched. It’s a natural conversation that comes up [in the vendor marketplace] where we say, okay, let’s make sure that we’re not discriminating against anyone in the design of this new product.

BS: Expanding on that, too, not even getting into that side of it, where we’re talking about discrimination, but weddings are so broad. I’ve been to a number of weddings. I’ve been to a wedding in the yard of a bar in New Orleans. I have been to a wedding at a very fancy club in Nantucket, Massachusetts. There’s so many different cultural traditions, traditional commercial traditions; there’s just so much. How can you design a product that fits every kind of potential couple that does come through the door just based on everything else that’s going on? Because I know every one I’ve been to has both felt the same in some ways, but also felt very, very different.

SLM: Yeah. So this was another thing that we actually tried to do early on in one of our products, which is a checklist where everyone’s like, I have no idea where to start what to do; please help me. And so we have a wedding checklist where we say, here are the things you need to think about. Think about the venue — where do you want to get married? Who do you want to invite? And to your point, it could have been easy to fall into a default one-fits-all. But, no, there’s very different cultures with very different traditions that, depending on the type of wedding you want to have, your checklist would change. So we incorporate that into the product. If you’re from a certain type of culture, [we would modify] activities in the checklist based on that. For example, an Indian wedding has different ceremonies and so we incorporated that into the planning and the timeline of the checklist. What I will say is that you are right, everyone’s wedding and experience is different. And it’s really up to them. We kind of say, “You do you.” What we try to do is offer a very flexible platform where people can pick any of the designs that we have, say for their wedding website, or their invitations, or they can upload their own. You can always personalize your wedding to really reflect you well, which is something, again, we’ve really seen as a big change over the last 10 years. Hopefully we’ve been a part of that in the degree to which people want to personalize their wedding day.

DMD: I’m so curious, I have to ask this. What was the pandemic like when the wedding industry just exploded, in terms of people having to cancel in that time?

SLM: It was one of the hottest periods of time, potentially the hottest of my professional career. As you might have guessed, everyone’s pushed their wedding back in terms of date or timing. Very early in that first week of lockdowns in the country, everyone was pushing their wedding dates back to later in the year. Because we could see that happening, we knew this was going to be a very hard time for both the company and the industry. And we started thinking two things. One is what do we need to do to support the couples who are obviously very stressed and upset that they’ve had to postpone something that they’ve probably already invested a lot in both emotionally and cash wise, but also what do we need to do to secure the business? What do we need to do to just plan for any scenario that could happen? And frankly, one of the hardest things during that period of time — apart from everyone just being panicked about what does this pandemic mean for me and my family — from a Zola perspective, was we were thinking who knows when weddings will come back, because who knows how long this pandemic is going to last. And while of course, we could put scenarios down on paper, like what if it lasts three months, what if it lasts six months, what if it lasts nine months. The thing is no one knew. Now sitting up here a few years later, now 2024, what did happen was that we saw, even though the pandemic might not have been over by the end of 2020, people did start to get married again. So what we thought was going to be kind of a no weddings year ended up being actually pretty strong in the latter part of the year. People decided, you know what, I’m going to get married. And so the bounce-back in terms of the wedding industry happened faster than I guess anyone would have projected. It was really toward the end of the year weddings picked up again. And then 2021, 2022, huge years for the weddings industry. I think a lot of people postponed and then also maybe put forward their wedding. So 2022 was the biggest year in decades in terms of the number of weddings in the U.S. But yeah, I would not want to relive 2020 again.

BS: I’m curious, coming out of that experience — which, of course, every business runs into those hurdles, runs into those peaks, those pits, as you can’t always plan for everything — what is something you’ve taken away from going through the pandemic that you guys can continue to implement at Zola to protect you from having something like that happen again? At the end of the day, is it helping push the business for you to have been through that experience and have been able to navigate a challenge like that?

SLM: I think one thing that it taught us is that speed is of the essence. And that you’re as soon as we saw people starting to move their wedding dates out. And we knew what the implications would be for both the couples and the business, we were able to act very quickly in terms of okay, thinking about what kinds of features and products do couples need in terms of how we can support them. So we launched this feature on people’s wedding websites where they could put a message to their guests in terms of how they were postponing their weddings or what they were doing what the plan was. We launched a virtual weddings feature we let anyone who had ordered a save the date or an invitation from us. We gave them free change-the-date cards. And so that quick response was really just overwhelmingly well received by couples and I think just kind of paid back in terms of the loyalty that Zola couples have to Zola, particularly from that timeframe is out of this world from the business perspective. I think we saw very quickly we have to start planning now. And for what we do if this pandemic lasts, all these different time periods, and how are you going to get through this? So those quick actions that we took to support the couples in the business, it kind of makes you think, okay, if we lived through that, we could live through anything, because we know how we can react is really dependent on us. I’m proud of the way that the team handled that. Because during what was clearly a time that people could potentially just freeze, no one froze. No one panicked. Everyone was like, Okay, we need to do what what the right thing is. And let’s just do it.

DMD: And switching gears just a little bit. I want to know more about your entrepreneurial journey. Growing up, did you always want to be a founder? Did you know that when you would have a wedding business, like what has been this process?

SLM: I was a nerd and still am a nerd. But growing up, I had always dreamed of being part of something, an industry that was changing the world, something where people who started from nothing kind of like myself came from the middle of nowhere. I grew up in Australia. It’s a lovely country, but it’s very remote, and you really feel like you’re very far away from the action. So growing up, I had posters of entrepreneurs I admired like Jerry Yang, the founder of Yahoo, was kind of on my bedroom wall. And so yes, I had always wanted to do what I’m doing now. I’m very lucky in that way. I don’t think I ever would have thought that it would be in weddings, because, I never particularly dreamt about my own wedding. I’m not married. So it’s just something where the stars aligned, and it was a combination of a market that I thought was really interesting and fun and joyful. And my skills and experience seem to match it. And there was this huge, exciting opportunity to go after and really serve my friends. And so here we are.

BS: And what has it been like personally for you? Because I know you worked at Yahoo for a while as well. And of course Dom. We love Yahoo, as Yahoo employees technically. You started at Yahoo. And then you were at Gilt, which was definitely more of kind of in that startup step phase, like in that scaling phase, and then launching your own company. What has this journey been like for you? Personally, I know, of course, being a founder, being an entrepreneur isn’t exactly the easiest job on the planet, and how have you kind of been able to adapt to that job in a business that has had so many challenges and ups and downs, since you guys got started?

SLM: You know, I think the years that I spent at Yahoo and Gilt were the best possible experience on trading ground for starting my own company. And I get many potential founders who come up to me and say I’m thinking of starting a business, but I don’t have that kind of experience. Do I need to get that kind of experience? Can I just start it now? And, of course, it always depends on the individual. But for me, I never felt ready. I personally felt like I wanted to get the experience and learn from people who could teach me how to do something that is best in class. So at Yahoo, what I learned was how to build products that are best in class from best-in-class products, people, once I started to see those great product leaders leaving for other companies. That’s when I started to think maybe it’s time for me to leave to at Gilt. I learned what does best in class look like in all these different startup functions. That then helped me identify what kind of qualities would I want in leaders in what ultimately became Zola. So for example, you get exposure. Even if you’re working in one particular function, you get exposure to so many things in a startup. So I learned, oh, what a merchandising people do want to finance, accounting, legal, talent, and HR people do, and got to do a little bit of everything. And then got also had the opportunity to launch and start my own business unit within that safety net of a bigger business, which was in retrospect, the best practice for then lodging a startup myself. So the advice I always give to people is follow people that you think you can learn from, and no matter what it is the company, the industry, if you are really inspired and think you can learn from and want to work for these people, you will gain so much in terms of how you then apply that to your future startup. Otherwise, you could learn it the hard way you could learn it yourself in your own startup. People do that, too. Sometimes it works out great. Sometimes it doesn’t work out. And for me, I really, I wasn’t in a financial position where I could just start a startup and afford to have it fail. And so many reasons why I did that journey. But I don’t regret it for a second. I’m so glad I did. And I hope and another thing Nobu and I, my co founder and I spoke about when starting Zola is we hope to give that experience to people who work at Zola, we hope that one day after many, many years of working with us, they will then go on and start their own startup and it will be better because they worked with us and we were able to hopefully pass something onto them.

BS: And thinking especially with talking about what you’ve learned and how that kind of affected how you started the business. If there was one thing and you can’t say nothing. What’s one thing if you could go back and change about starting the business getting started being new to being a founder? What would you change?

Shan-Lyn Ma I really wish I would have prioritized if finance and accounting function and skill set much earlier than I did. You know, I think in many early stage startups you kind of running to get the product launch, then get the product into the hands of users or couples for us then get some kind of revenue so that you can afford to keep going. And you have all these 101 priorities. And for me, it never quite made it to the top of the list to make sure that books were best in class. And so yeah, we had a bookkeeper, a part time bookkeeper, like many startups do, but it was not until we started to raise more serious rounds of funding that I realized, oh, no, we actually need an in house team of great finance and accounting people. And I wish we had built that team much earlier, because it resulted in a lot of long, sleepless nights and weekends, trying to put it all together in a very condensed timeline, which, you know, in retrospect, was just unnecessary stress that both myself and team much more than I should have

Becca Szkutak I’m definitely curious, you guys are now just a little over 10 years into the business, what are the next 10 years look like? I know about it products, you’ve added these different aspects to the business, but kind of where does it go from here?

Shan-Lyn Ma You know, when one thing we realize is that we really are a modern life stage company. So speaking about where to couples kind of ask us our biggest to kind of expand into next. Another thing that I’ve heard pretty much from the first year of Zola is, can you please now helped me with my baby registry. So I think we spoke a bit about baby earlier. But for 10 years, we said again, no, we can’t do that yet. That’s not the right time for us. And then last year, with the closure of byebye. Baby, we thought, Well, if there’s ever a time to do it, this is the time so we did launch Zola baby, we now kind of see a great number of people who use all of their weddings over the past few years use us for baby. And I think it’s one another kind of life stage or category where there is no clear tech driven market leader. And so it’s an exciting phase because we continue to expand both in weddings and the number of things that we do right from that first day of getting edge. And then we are also expanding outwards. Now, first day that you learned that you you might be having a baby. Other than that I continue to be excited about AI, as is the entire world. We’re kind of playing around with the tech to see how can we use it to support couples in a way that they find genuinely useful. We just recently launched an AI tool that helps couples right there thank you notes, which is one of the top things couples complain about in terms of how painful it is to write like 75 to 200. thank you notes and perfect use case. Right. So we launched that in our mobile app. And we’ll continue I think to launch more things like that to help take the workload off. That’s unnecessary. Unfortunately, I wish I could could say this is not the case. But unfortunately, women still do an unfair share of wedding planning work. And so yeah, we’re passionate about helping make that both more equitable, but also maybe lighten that load.

Becca Szkutak I think that’s a good place to wrap because we’re pretty much right at time. But I love the thought of an AI. thank you note, you said that. And I started thinking about it. And I’m like, they really are like, Hey, thanks for coming to the wedding. Thank you for the gift, like love the couple edits. Like it’s true. It’s like I don’t expect something heartfelt because I know how many they have to do. So that actually does make a great case for AI. One, then Sam Altman should look into that. That’s all I’m gonna say.

Shan-Lyn Ma Well, we have your guest list that, you know, we helped you put together and we have the designs that you picked out for your invitation. So imagine you could use the AI tool to have the note done right there, edit it slightly, and then we can print it directly into your thank you card for you. And you’re done.

Becca Szkutak We love a practical use case for AI. But thank you so much for coming on the show. This has been really fun. So thanks for taking the time.

Shan-Lyn Ma Thank you. It was great. Appreciate it.

Becca Szkutak And that was our conversation with Shan starting with the two truths and a lie I’m going to take at this time because unfortunately the lie was something that I said by accident. So a little bit of a different format than our usual two truths and a lie. When I mentioned that my friend was getting married next weekend she had a site on Zola. I was confusing her wedding with one of the very many I went to last year. Her site is on The Knot. I went to a couple of weddings on Zola last year. I regret the air. I had just been getting off a red eye flight that morning. No excuse but the reason your listeners we decided to keep it in as opposed to say cutting it out is that we think it sparks an interesting conversation about competition. Sure. Well, my brain was kind of fried when I said that. We asked Shan a little bit about the competition between some of the different platforms like Joy, Zola, and the Knot I think they’re a little more similar than Shin let on to especially as a guest I know personally, I have never noticed really any difference between the platforms. I don’t know what you thought about that, Dom.

Dom Davis I, oh, my goodness, I’ve only been to one wedding. And it was very recently. And so I’ve never used any of these wedding platforms before. But I mean, based off of just a simple elite, I don’t see how different day could be really, I mean, when the service functions are like the same, basically, right?

Becca Szkutak Because it’s like, in theory, people want the same things. And we’re all talking about the same thing surrounding the same event. I was curious. And I definitely put myself out there by bugging my friend about this, who is literally preparing for her wedding in one week. But I asked her, like, why did you use The Knot over Zola, or some of the other options? And she said, largely word of mouth. Like they just knew other people who had used it. And there was like, a little bit of the pricing stuff, but it didn’t sound like that was kind of what drove the decision at the end of the day. But I mean, it’s a bit of industry that it would seem weird if there was one player, so I don’t really necessarily think there being a fair amount of competition in this space really matters as much as some other industries.

Dom Davis No, I don’t I don’t think it matters at all. I think there should be more. I mean, how many wedding companies are there like this? Because I don’t hear about it often. But I’m also none of my friends are getting married, man. It’s hard out here. So I’m like, Nah, I’m, like totally disconnected from this wedding world. How many of there are there because I feel like I’d heard of Zola. But now that I’m thinking back, I think I’ve also heard of the knot.

Becca Szkutak Yeah, the only other one I know of is Joy, which is another venture backed startup. And I know of them because I covered one of their funding rounds a couple of years ago. But again, like even with them to chatting with them, some of their answers are on like how they were different, kind of or similar to what Shan said about being able to just if a customer tries to use them, which she had mentioned a few times, and they are like, we want this feature, which you don’t already have. And she was like, Oh, we learned to be quick to build it, like build these products that our customers are asking for as like a competitive edge. And it sounds like they all do that. But I guess if you are hearing different things from your different customers, they’re gonna end up with like, slightly different differences on the back end too

Dom Davis Yeah, I think I don’t know how many different ways there are to plan a wedding. I think the basics are the same. Right. But I wouldn’t know once again, I wouldn’t know. But what what are your thoughts on the the AI? thank you notes. I think that’s it. I mean, does it matter if the thank you note, or the gift note is personal or not? Is that a big deal?

Becca Szkutak Personally, one, I am a thank you note, Stan. I still write them for my birthday and things like that to my older family members because I know that they like getting them even though I know people always joke like Gen Z doesn’t even know what a thank you card is. I love a thank you note but I also think for weddings and and I think you know what, I actually don’t hate that because I get that they have to do so many. And I also just feel like my attendance like No one plans, their weddings so that I come you know, like I get how big of like a hurdle it is to do those kind of things. You know, it’s I remember I raise money for like a race a couple of years ago, and I was like, I’m gonna send thank you notes to everyone who donated over like $50 or something like that. And I sat down to write them and there weren’t crazy personal but after 25 I was like oh my god fuck this like I was like this is taking hours just to like do like a significantly smaller amount like most weddings have. So I may be pro AI thank you note, but that might be a controversial take.

Dom Davis No I mean, my hand hurts thinking about it. I would definitely be like a thanks exclamation point moving on, because what but were people handwriting these anyway? Or were they using some type of Microsoft Word or like I’m basing it off the thank you note that I got from the wedding that didn’t look handwritten to me. It looked like it was like that was thought that was clear font from like a font machine or something. Yeah, maybe that’s like the personalized thank you note industry.

Becca Szkutak I have no idea. Big thank you note.

Dom Davis The big thank you. No industry. Sam Altman is coming. Okay. But I guess that is the way AI would disrupt the wedding industry. Yeah, AI is everywhere.

Becca Szkutak It really is. But I think one of the other things that stood out to me about this conversation is some of the talk we had about inclusivity, which I know it sounds like Zola really prides themselves on how inclusive they’ve been as far as making sure their site is set up for same sex couples, as well as just like different wedding arrangements than the traditional, say, bride and groom. But there definitely is some other stuff in their history that’s worth touching on.

Dom Davis When I was talking about when I mentioned, like some people are getting married in places they shouldn’t be. That was a direct hit at people who get married at slave plantations. And that Wall Street Journal article that shows people are now getting married in prisons. That’s weird behavior, everyone, I just have to first call that out. So there was a controversy a few years ago, or not a controversy. It was just this advocacy organization called Color of Change, sent a note out to kind of all the big wedding players, including the knot, I believe, just saying like, hey, people are getting married at slave plantations. That’s weird. Can you tell them to stop? And you know, the big players said, Yeah, you’re right. That is weird. So they’ve stopped and I think the thing that happened with Zola was, at first they were like, Oh, this doesn’t violate our policy, and then they came back and they were like, actually, we’re gonna start working with Color of Change to be better being more inclusive and everything. And so that was something that happened a few years ago. And I brought it up, because I don’t know, it’s just really interesting. Like, how do you as a platform, weddings are very magical days for people? And how do you kind of create boundaries with people like that saying, like, Hey, you can’t get married at Alcatraz? Like, that’s insane. You know, but at the same time, you want to please your customers, but she did not address that at all.

Becca Szkutak No, no, it definitely feels like one of those situations where it’s like, the substack argument, where people they’re like, Well, we’re a free speech platform. And like, anyone can write whatever they want here. We can’t like police them. And then users are like, well, then you’re gonna have bad stuff on there. Like you have to like, and I’m sure, cuz you mentioned their whole agreements with vendors on the platform sounds like that existed prior to that. But it was just that they wouldn’t discriminate against any couples who wanted to potentially get married there, which I know, that doesn’t sound like that was the issue. Obviously, that’s not the issue of when she said like, Sure, it doesn’t violate that. But like, we can look a little more big picture.

Dom Davis That was so funny when she said that I was like, No, that was not the issue. The issue was not always getting married. It was where

Becca Szkutak no, but I mean, I do on the one hand, you do get her argument where it’s like, even if they take them off the marketplace, it’s like someone, there’s probably wedding sites on there. Right now we’re getting married at save plantations, they just didn’t find the vendor through the marketplace. So it’s like she did make a good point where it’s like, they only can do so much. But they definitely can at least acknowledge, like, what they can do.

Dom Davis I guess Definitely. It’s just an interesting conversation, I guess, in terms of the role that companies and founders play in shaping society. I do not think people should get married in prisons. No, that’s not something that I would help someone do. If you’re a wedding planner, and someone is trying to get married at Rikers, stop, like say, no, just say no. So I guess it’s, I guess this is where capitalism intersects with society and values and everything, and kind of where’s the line for a company and a founder to walk that line, especially

Becca Szkutak with the being like a marketplace to because I’m sure, it’d be interesting to talk to other marketplace. And obviously, this is not fully a marketplace. But what we’re talking about relates to the marketplace that they do have, but like, I’m sure you’d get the argument a lot. But it’s like, well, people can choose who they want to work with. Like, they are just the platform to connect people. So it’s like, I don’t know, I can see people making the argument. It’s not an endorsement of having stuff like that on the site. I personally don’t agree with that. But um, I definitely can see why there would be a perceived gray area, even though I don’t think there’s a greater personally Yeah,

Dom Davis but you know, that’s just us. Those are just our thoughts and opinions.

Becca Szkutak I mean, those kinds of wedding venues are probably booked every weekend isn’t just a different world.

Dom Davis Those antebellum weddings are ripping to the south, please stop. Why? Just be more creative, just be more creative. Like, seriously.

Becca Szkutak it’s such a huge thing, too. It is nice that these platforms have kind of been able to stay. And I know, she talks about like, COVID. And it’s interesting how they were able to adapt, even though I’m glad to have not been planning a wedding at that time, because a virtual wedding may have killed me, like I cannot I cannot do a virtual wedding.

Dom Davis I wanted to ask her about if she seen any of the Animal Crossing weddings, because that was like a thing. You know, like people were having graduations they were we trust I remember the Animal Crossing meet up this people were having I was using Animal Crossing, because that’s I don’t know, why was I doing that? I don’t know. I also wanted to ask her if she saw an increase in people having multiple weddings, because it seems like a lot of people just had two weddings at the time.

Becca Szkutak Yeah, I would be curious about that, too. Because it is kind of a product where you hope use it once. Like, that’s why it is interesting. Weddings are such a huge industry, which is interesting, because it’s a one time industry, which usually those kind of things aren’t good businesses to invest in and like aren’t huge industries, trying to do another example. Like I always think about cars, like when they get like car demand wrong. And it’s like, well, sure, I’m interested in getting electric vehicle, but I’m planning to buy a car every 12 to 14 years. So it’s like, it’s not something you do all the time, when the new thing comes out. You don’t like go and get a new car. So it’s like the weddings is so interesting in that way that it like has been able to be this like, ginormous thing that it is, even though it’s like people you hope to use it once.

Dom Davis I know. Which makes me think how, how sustainable and profitable. Oh, actually, what are the metrics of the wedding industry? Aside from them up charging people at venues for food and stuff? What are the metrics of but I guess also, do people even get married once now or are a second or third? Like I don’t know. I always tell people I would be a great second wife. So already that’s like two weddings for Zola. How many times are people getting married now? Anyway? I don’t know what the financials are of this industry.

Becca Szkutak Oh, I just know it’s big. And if it gets a news to be big, I mean, it’s a good industry to grow in for sure.

Dom Davis Big Wedding into St. This is going to be the next will. But will investors still get it? Will investors get it? Because they always miss out on the big industries?

Becca Szkutak Yeah, I don’t know. It sounds like this one has like worked out decently well, for the companies in it. Yeah. What’s the next disruption in the wedding industry?

Dom Davis And is it seen as a women’s industry? Did we talk about that a little bit? Like, how is the wedding industry seen to investors who are looking at are they saying like, Oh, this is just like a targeted toward women? Or do they see it as like an everything in every one type of business.

Becca Szkutak That’s what was interesting, because she had mentioned, obviously, like, raising the seed round was relatively easy for her and her co founder. And, of course, not all weddings, but a lot of weddings include men, as well. But I definitely feel like planning is seen as like a women’s thing, like setting up the website and stuff like that. But then it’s also that weird thing, because when you have same sex couples have you have two men, there is no woman to be setting up the site. So it’s like maybe that’s what kind of has shielded it from getting put into that box. Because I know one of the other companies in the space I’ve talked to is like the founding teams, all men who like we’re running into the same issues like going to their friend’s weddings and stuff like that. So it was like, maybe it is that universal, even though it definitely gets that more like perception of being a more feminine aspect. Wedding wedding planning in general seems like a more feminine aspect of it. But yeah, maybe it is more universal, which would be a good thing because it should be but it doesn’t usually work out that way.

Dom Davis I hope more investors back more wedding planning businesses because it’s clearly everyone is suffering as a guest and that is what I’m seeing and hearing. So that’s it. invest more in wedding put help us help us.

Becca Szkutak Help us plan our future weddings. Dom second wedding.

IMAGES

  1. Groom Wedding Speech Guide with Examples| TopWeddingSites.com

    how to write a good groom wedding speech

  2. How To Write A Good Toast Father Of Groom

    how to write a good groom wedding speech

  3. How To Write A Good Maid Of Honor

    how to write a good groom wedding speech

  4. Groom Speech Quotes. QuotesGram

    how to write a good groom wedding speech

  5. Groom Wedding Speech Template Free

    how to write a good groom wedding speech

  6. Ultimate Groom Speech Guide With Examples

    how to write a good groom wedding speech

COMMENTS

  1. How to Write The Perfect Groom's Speech (With Examples)

    1. Don't be too formal Unless you're known for your love of a bit of pomp and circumstance then you don't suddenly have to become the master of all things etiquette and stuffy speech-making just because it's your wedding day.

  2. Top 10 Groom Speech Examples

    Couple Advice Expert Advice Sophia Shafiee Last updated: 15th Aug 2023 Bookmark Share The great thing about the groom's speech is that it's generally one of the easiest to write. You don't need to stress about making everyone laugh like the best man or worry about whether your words are heartfelt enough, like the father of the bride.

  3. 12 Groom Speech Tips: How to Make a Killer Groom's Speech

    1. Acknowledge This Special Moment "A great groom speech should be a really good dollop of entertainment and fun, whilst at the same time acknowledging what a very special moment this is.

  4. Groom Speech Examples And Writing Tips (+ Free Template)

    ADVERTISEMENT Ironically, brides are always prepared, but grooms often leave the speech at the last minute, probably from panic. So whether you're shy, confused about what to do, or don't have the time to whip up something, we've got you covered. See our Post for the best groom wedding speeches tips and ideas ever. Quick Navigation Speech Examples

  5. Everything to Know About Your Groom Speech

    This is a great chance for you to say thanks: You can thank your guests for being there, thank your family members for their financial and emotional support, thank your wedding vendors for...

  6. How to Write a Wedding Speech: Examples, Tips, and Advice

    "You'll lose them if you do this." Introduce Yourself After your opener, introduce yourself, says Fallon Carter, a wedding planner, even designer, and professional speaker. "A lot of times,...

  7. The Groom Speech: What to Write, Say & Do

    Ideas & Advice / Planning Advice The Groom Speech: Here's What to Write, Say & Do All your burning groom's speech questions—answered. Cheers! Molly Lichten Photography by Jessica Estrada Updated Jul 25, 2021

  8. 8 Tips for How to Write a Groom's Speech

    Speak loudly and slowly. Use a microphone. Don't try to memorize your speech and don't read it from your phone. Instead, print a copy of your speech and read from the paper while making natural eye contact throughout your delivery. Keep hand gestures to a minimum. If you mess up a line, don't apologize.

  9. How To Write Your Wedding Speech (Grooms' Edition)

    1. Say thank you If you're part of a couple made up of a bride and groom, it's likely you'll be the second speech of the evening as it's tradition for the groom's speech to follow the father of the bride's. In this case, you may want to start by thanking him for his kind words - and, of course, raising his wonderful daughter! Psst!

  10. The Groom's Speech: The Ultimate Guide to Making Your Speech

    The groom traditionally thanks and leads toasts to the following in his speeches: The father of the bride (or the equivalent person in that role). The groom should thank them for their speech on behalf of himself and his new wife or husband. The guests. The groom should thank the guests for coming to celebrate their day.

  11. Groom Speech Examples: 7 Keys To Writing The Perfect One

    The ideal wedding speech for a groom should be a blend of romance, entertainment, and authenticity. Writing doesn't come naturally to everyone, so to start, write down the main points of your speech first. These tips will help when it comes to writing your first draft.

  12. How To Write A Wedding Speech: The Ultimate Guide For Do's, Don'ts, and

    how to write a wedding speech dos Someone you love is getting married, and you've just been asked to give a speech at the wedding. What an honor! But also, if you're not used to giving speeches, what a nightmare! Public speaking can be scary, which is why many people prefer to avoid it.

  13. How to Write A Killer Bride or Groom Wedding Speech

    Getting ready to write your bride or groom wedding speech? Awesome! We've got all the steps you need to write a killer wedding speech that will leave the room laughing, crying and applauding wildly by the time you drop the mic. Decide on the logistics Before you get to the nitty-gritty of speech writing, figure out some of the big picture issues.

  14. The Ultimate Groom's Wedding Speech Checklist

    Mention your new parents in law and siblings - this is a good time to tell them how happy you are to join the family, how welcome/terrified they made you feel, how you promise to be there for their son or daughter/brother or sister. Mention your siblings - be specific about things they helped you with or special memories.

  15. Groom Wedding Speech Guide with Examples| TopWeddingSites.com

    Just remember what your wedding is about. It is about you and your wife: fewer jokes, more love. Yes, call her 'my wife': We recommend you do this early in the groom's speech. Mention 'my wife and me.'. Do it right, and you will. It will always receive a warm clap and will help set your nerves.

  16. How to Write a Wedding Speech: Your Easy Step-by-Step Guide

    How to Write a Wedding Speech Writing your wedding speech is no easy feat. To help ensure things go as smoothly as possible, we tapped into Renée Dalo, owner of Moxie Bright Events in Los Angeles, California. Below, she shares a step-by-step guide. Brainstorm a great opening.

  17. Writing the Groom's Speech: The Ultimate Guide to Your Wedding Toast

    A Groom's Wedding Speech is one of the four traditional wedding speeches. Typically, the Groom's wedding speech follows the speeches of the Father of the Bride and the Best Man, and is followed by the Maid of Honour (historically, a Bride would not make a speech). Of course, it will be completely up to you as a couple to decide who will be ...

  18. Groom Speech Examples

    "I Consider Myself the Luckiest Man" - Groom Speech by David "Additionally, sending his apologies today is Amy's cat, Marvin. Marv is unable to attend such a busy event due to ongoing anxiety issues stemmed from his feuds with the 'Black Cat' but he wishes us a purrrrrfect day". By hitched.co.uk, 23/04/2020 Groom Speech Examples Speech by Will

  19. How to Write the Perfect Groom Speech

    Seb of Great Speech Writing agrees. "You don't want you speech to become a long list of thank yous," he points out. So just keep it to the really vital people. Everyone else can get a thank you note. Your new in-laws and your own parents. This is your moment to gain some serious credit with your new wife's parents, so don't throw it away.

  20. HOW TO WRITE A MEMORABLE GROOM SPEECH

    Traditionally, the wedding reception is home to several speeches from the wedding party and the bride and groom's parents. It's a time to celebrate the new marriage and share stories of fond memories of the couple. Your groom speech is a chance to share how much you love your bride, but writing the groom's speech can be daunting for those who haven't attended several weddings this year ...

  21. How to Write a Wedding Speech: 13 Steps (with Pictures)

    Remember, the focus of your speech is the married couple. 2. Open with a joke. Start by telling a joke or recalling a humorous anecdote to loosen up the crowd (and yourself. Humor is very disarming, so getting everyone laughing right off the bat can help dispel some of the nerves of giving a speech.

  22. How to write a Groom's wedding speech

    Here's a simple outline that will work for most groom speeches: · Introduce yourself, and say a few words about the day so far. · Welcome everyone, and thank them for coming. · Thank specific people involved in the wedding. · Share a personal anecdote or story about your wedding planning journey, or relationship.

  23. How to Write a Perfect Wedding Speech

    Wait for your most creative time of the day, and turn off any distractions. Spend some unrushed time thinking about your relationship to the couple, and what you'd like to say.". While there ...

  24. Easy, peasy: How to write a groom's wedding speech

    Thanking them is typically, the climax of a groom's speech and the point you make your wedding toast, so build up to it. When you thank your new spouse, obviously do more than just say 'Thank You'. Weave in a lovely story or two and express your feelings for her at this pivotal moment in your life. Talking about your partner.

  25. How to Write a Rehearsal Dinner Speech

    Spread the loveIntroduction: Rehearsal dinners are a time for the wedding party, family and friends to come together and celebrate before the big day. Often, someone who is playing an integral part in the wedding will give a speech at this event to express gratitude and well-wishes for the couple. Writing a rehearsal dinner speech may seem daunting, but with these tips and tricks, you'll be ...

  26. "Jealous Witch": Bride's Sister Steals The Spotlight By Reading Groom's

    During her speech, she unexpectedly took out a love letter that the groom wrote to her when they were in the 8th grade. Read further to find a real-life example of what no t to say at a wedding to ...

  27. Zola wants to bring the wedding industry into the 21st century

    Bringing the wedding industry into the 21st century with Shan-Lyn Ma of Zola. This week Becca and Dom are joined by Shan-Lyn Ma, the co-founder and CEO of Zola, an online platform for wedding ...